Of course not!

Carl's idiotic decision had led to this moment, so...why not double-down? Surely that wouldn't have consequences!

"What? No! I was just - just worried about the other people, is all."

Aundrea gave him "the look" a second time, eyebrow raised. However, she did not press him further. Their eyes drifted to Evelyn, the awkward silence filling the room again like so much cloud of space dust. Aundrea moved to say something, but Carl got his words out first.

"So...are we good?"
"I - yes? Your mom wanted me to check on you, you appear to be fine, so...yes." She began to back toward the door once more. "Call her: she should hear from you."
Carl gave a little salute-gesture in response. "Will do."
"And water Evelyn: she looks thirsty."
"Yep."
"Okay."
"...Okay."

Aundrea sighed, giving Carl a half-smile before saying 'goodbye' and shutting the door behind her. Carl's shoulders slumped: why did he have to be weird around her? They had perfectly normal conversations in the past, and now there existed a barrier that wasn't there before. If this whole event had shown anything, it was that he was both an idiot and inept. Having just lied to the girl he loved, it would serve him right to get infected with cosmic rays and die from fifteen cancers, let alone any one in particular. Probably would include testicular cancer, too; really emphasize how stupid of a man he was.

Carl absentmindedly scratched his balls before shuffling over to the sink; there he went through the motions of watering Evelyn. Grab the pail. Fill the pail. Itch himself. Move to the plant. Dispense the water. Scratch himself again. Though as if to dwell on his previous thought, he could feel the itchiness continue to grow in his crotch, a heat starting to simmer. Carl picked up his pace, but it would not abate from idle touching: this only seemed to exasperate the problem. Groaning in a mixture of pain and confusion, he dropped the empty watering pail and stumbled over to the couch. Once there, his mind raced as-to what to do.

Soothing lotion? He was trying to alleviate the itchiness, not masturbate in his living room!
Ice bath? Maybe that could combat the heat, although it seemed unlikely. Plus he'd have to acquire the ice first.
Call Aundrea back? She could take him to the doctor: that would be the smartest play, admittedly, but then he'd have to admit he lied to her.
Call Aundrea back, then fuck her? That could - wait, why did his mind go there?!

The thought of having sex with his ex-girlfriend would not go away. The more Carl tried to come up with actual solutions, the more pressing the idea became. And all along, the heat rose in his pants. They could do it right there in the entranceway: they wouldn't even need to head to the bedroom. And Evelyn could watch; hell, Evelyn could participate for all he cared! A sexy three-way between a man, a woman, and their houseplant. The American Dream. Argh! The fire in his loins was becoming unbearable! Carl groaned again, fumbling for the button on his jeans. His enflamed nether region didn't help matters, making the process of removing his pants a truly miserable experience. His hands would brush his penis, already hard from his sexual thoughts and rubbing against his boxers and the denim, amplifying the heat and the pain. It took much longer than was normally required to free himself from his pants. Carl sighed in momentary relief at his victory.

It was not to last, however.

"Ahh, what the fuck?"