Not to Trishas liking

"Did he seem to mind?" John choked out between laughs.

"Yes you idiot! Of course he minded! he just caught me streaking in my own damn yard! you asshole!" I found myself shouting.

"That wasn't nice to say," he pouted.

"Oh my god, get over it! You just made me streak, and I flashed someone who has known me since I was like 5 years old! This is awful! How can I ever face him again!?" I shouted at my brother.

"Oh come on," he choked between laughs. "Its not THAT big of a deal. I'm sure he's seen a woman naked before. " he said.

"Buts now he's seen ME naked you jerk!" I shouted, knees shakily holding me up as I did.

I didn't have much time to unwind when I peaked a movement coming up our footpath through the living room blinds.

"Oh my god! He's coming over! Make him go away!" I shouted running into the bathroom.

"Stop Trish. Stay right there. Are you fucking wet right now?"

"John that's, none of your business... shut up, and let me go get dressed!"

"No," came a curt reply between sniggers, that were seemingly given an exclamation point of a well timed knock on the door.

"Answer the door," he said with a forceful smile.

"Please John, don't make me do this," I pleaded with tears welling in my eyes.

His smile made me doubt his willingness to budge on the issue, but his face did brighten and he said softly "Trisha, it's not that big of a deal, just tell him you are experimenting with nudity, since it's not like it's illegal, and ask if he minds."

The air streamed out of my lungs as my hand reached out for the handle. I'm about to flash am old man. Not just flash, but conversate with. My hand shook but followed orders as the lock clicked, and rays of light beamed through the opening.

The door stood wide open. I couldn't find words for the wide eyed man in front of me.

" Um..... Hi Mr. Wilson," I stammered. I wasn't covering, why wasn't I covering? Would it be weird to cover up now?

"Is everything ok Mrs Williams?" he asked.

He was admittedly being about as respectful as he could be, given that I was completely exposed before him. His eyes only briefly shift down before snapping back up to my eyes. This did not help the stubborn feeling in my stomach or my shaking legs as I stood there for what felt like an eternity before answering.

"Everything is fine sir," I said, sounding way more calm that I felt. "Just trying out my birthday suit around the house. I hope I didn't offend you." I put on the most **** smile I have ever worn. In the corner of my eye I could see John holding in the laughter with his literal hand.

"Oh, you didn't bother me dear, I just wanted to make sure everything was ok, I didn't expect to see, well, you know," he gestured at my body.

" I know sir, it's a bit shocking, one of the Kardashians does a naked red carpet appearance and all is girls have to give it a shot!," I shouted louder than I intended. "Just seeing how it feels! Nice weather huh?" I'm literally dying inside. C'mon Trish, you don't to scream every word.

"All the girls are doing it?" He puzzled staring at me unconvinced.

I sighed, "Well maybe just me then. It's a little embarrassing, but in this humidity can you blame me?" I shouted once again, fanning myself exaggeratedly.

"Well if it doesn't bother you, consider me not bothered as well. I think I'll keep my kit on, but it looks smart on you. Should I let the neighborhood watch know about this to keep an eye out for your safety?" He asked still unsure.

"Absolutely!" I shouted at the man. Why the Fuck did I say that!? Oh yes sir please tell the neighborhood to look out for my naked body!

"Oh alright then, can't be too safe. So you'll be dressed this way..... Often?"

"Don't know, just trying it out! It's fun right!? Every day can be a birthday haha". I hate myself, where are these words even coming from?

"You aren't going out of the neighborhood dressed like that are you?" My stomach tightened at the mere thought of John getting ideas.

"Of course not, that'd be insane" I said emphasizing the insane in John's direction. "Like I said, I was just trying it out! I need to go Mr. Wilson, I have things to do, see you later!" I said closing the door on the man as he stammered a surprised goodbye.

Once the door closed John let his laughter erupt. It was nearly ten minutes before he finally got a hold of himself. Eventually his laughter infected me and we laughed over the absurd conversation.

"John, ok it WAS funny, but please don't ever ask me to do anything like that again."