No, just hope that Hank doesn't say anything to Candace

Nate kept his fingers crossed that Hank wouldn’t spill his secret. Things looked promising. Candace texted on Saturday morning – the morning after her mixer with Hank – to confirm her date with Nate. She didn’t mention Hank at all.

That evening, they met at a local pizza place that turned out to be a favorite of both of them. And with its dark wood paneling and dim lighting, it was a perfect romantic spot. The flames from their table’s candle cast an angelic glow on Candace’s face.

Their conversation was lively and flirtatious. Nate seemed to have shed his usual awkward demeanor for something much more suave. Wouldn’t this be something, he thought to himself, the newly-handsome nerd sweeping the popular girl off her feet.

After they’d placed their dessert orders, Nate excused himself to use the restroom. He’d been holding it in for a while because he didn’t want to interrupt the evening’s magic.

“Ahh,” he sighed as he finally relieved himself at the urinal trough.

“Looks like someone hasn’t added any inches since we last met.”

It was Hank, his head turned to stare directly down at the small pink nub that peeked out of the fly of Nate’s slacks. Tauntingly, Hank reached down to tug at his own five flaccid inches.

Nate immediately tucked his tiny member away, splashing urine down his pants in the process.

“Heh, need some practice at the urinal, Natey?”

“F- fuck you Hank. What the hell are you doing here?”

Hank zipped up. “Better put this away so you don’t feel too ... overshadowed, Natey. I mean, you need to keep up the illusion that you’re some kind of big man to impress Candace.”

“You leave her out of this,” Nate snapped back.

“The thing is, I think she’s pretty sweet... I happen to like her. And I just don’t want her to end up with a man who will never be able to satisfy her.”

“Grow up, Hank. Unlike you, Candace is not some childish moron who puts so much stock in trivialities.”

“So, cuz – if the size of your junk is so irrelevant, you wouldn’t mind if I spread the word. Right? Let Candace, all your friends know, Nate’s got an itty bitty penis. Because all the very-adult intellectuals here at HHU couldn’t possibly care about such a trivial detail.”

Nate’s eyes widened involuntarily.

“Your expression tells me all I need to know, Natey.” Hank sneered.

“N- no. Don’t be such an asshole, Hank. You know how ... some people... would react to that....”

“Maybe folks here are more childish than you’d like to admit. Listen, I like messin’ with you, but I don’t really want to subject you to the humiliation you’d face if your little secret got out.”

Hank flashed a smug grin.

“So here it is. You break things off with Candace – tonight – and I’ll keep my mouth shut. Deal?”