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“Okay,” you say, standing in front of the room. Dr. Theodore has asked that you briefly introduce yourself. You know, considering you’re a transfer student, and everyone else knows each other.

“I’m Peter. I live on the other side of the country, and–” Before you can finish your sentence, the blonde bombshell Sabrina raises her hand. She smacks on a piece of gum and smiles at you.

“You’re cute. What’s your face-care routine?” The class chuckles. But Sabrina looks completely earnest. She tilts her head like a confused puppy and smacks her gum, waiting for an answer.

You clear your throat. “Uh,” you say, “warm water and–” And then you get interrupted again, this time by her buff, dopey-eyed boyfriend. He looks like he struggles with simple thoughts.

“Do you play sports?” Callum asks, looking you up and down. “You look like a swimmer. Do you swim?” Again, you start to answer a question, but this time Dr. Theodore steps in and chuckles.

“Alright, alright,” he says. “How about we break up into pairs to discuss Coriolanus. Callum and Sabrina, since you’re both so curious, let’s have one of you catch Peter up on the latest reading.”