New world, new me.

I scrunch my eyes shut, the white, all-encompassing light glaring painfully bright. I lose track of time as the sensation persists, but eventually the light fades. Eyes still clenched shut, the first thing I notice is the trilling call of a distant bird. The realisation is enough for other little details to come streaming in.

The air is warm and smells fresh, with sweet hints that speak of blooming plants. I can feel the warmth of sunlight against my face and feel the stirrings of a slight breeze as it ruffles my hair and fills the surrounds with the sound of swishing leaves. The ground underfoot has shifted from hard tile to something soft and loamy.

Soon, the unnaturally bright light fades, and ever so slowly I peel open my eyes, holding my breath in anticipation of my first look of my new home. I got the briefest glance of what is probably a forest, before my vision is drowned in notification windows.

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Quest complete!

Congratulations! You have completed the Quest: Evacuate!

Objectives completed:

• Accept the offer of evacuation at the end of the 2 hours prep (1/1).

_You have received the following_:

• X1 Rooky adventurer’s starter set
• Full access to the IRLRPG System.

Optional Objectives completed:

• Start an adventuring party. (1/1 party formed)
• Reward: Access to the Party interface (already granted).
• Invite your family members to your party. (4/4 party invites accepted)
• Reward: your family evacuated with you.
• Fill your inventory with your belongings. (14/30 inventory slots filled)
• Reward: An inventory (almost half) full of useful items.

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The window closes, and I am granted another flash of brown and green (probably trees?) before my view is immediately taken up by another window.

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You have now been granted full access to the IRLRPG System. You are now able to view your status, skill and magic pages. As you have yet to view your status screen, it is highly recommended you do it now. View status? (Y/N)

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With excitement (and more than a little trepidation) I select yes, and am met with the following:

https://imgur.com/Hxn0QGL

Hell yes, I have Mana now! A quick glace confirms that a blue bar has now joined the red and green bars already present in my vison. I take a moment to revel in the knowledge that magic was now within my grasp, before glancing over my Attribute scores.

‘Okay… could be worse, could be considerably better. Attributes are the good ol’ familiar D&D Attributes, so the tomato rule applies.’ I smile to myself as I try to remember the meme. ‘How did it go again? Oh yeah, Strength is a measure of how far you could throw a tomato, Constitution lets you eat rotten tomatoes without getting sick, and Agility shows how accurately you could throw a tomato. As for the metal stats, Intelligence tells you that a tomato is a fruit, Wizdom stops you putting a tomato into a fruit salad, and Charisma helps you sell tomato-based fruit salads.’

I study the numbers that I have been assigned briefly and overall; they aren’t too surprising. I always knew that I had the upper body strength of cooked spaghetti, so the physical side of my attributes made sense. ‘Still, 3’s and 4’s? Ouch!’

The honest surprise (at least to me) was my relatively high Charisma. I eye the nine with more than a little annoyance, wondering where it had been all my life. ‘Kinda sucks that I can’t blame my complete lack of girlfriends on a low Charisma score. Actually, how high is a nine?’ The thought has barely formed when a tool-tip pops up, answering my question.

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Attribute scaling:

Attributes, especially physical Attributes, will have differing levels of effects on different people. As a general rule of thumb for physical Attributes is that an Attribute score of 5 is considered the average for your planet of origin, whereas a score of 10 would be considered the peak of what is possible naturally. Mental Attributes tend to differ differ strongly from person to person, so are much more difficult to summarise. How attributes scale beyond the 10 point mark is something you will need to discover on your own.

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Now that is interesting. Beyond ten in a stat is considered superhuman? I can’t help the power fantasy that plays out in my mind, but it's tempered by caution. I hadn’t missed the part about those scores being the average for Earth. Presumably, things here on this new world were different.

I hear various ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’ around me, presumably my family are looking over their stats too. I close my own stat screen for now, knowing full well that I’d be back later at a quiet moment to do some number crunching. I’m honestly not surprised at this point when, as soon as the stat window is closed, another springs up to take its place.

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Congratulations! For taking the reins of command during a distressing situation, preventing panic in your Party, and motivating your Party through your words and actions, you have unlocked the following Skills:

• Leadership (Lvl 1).
• Speech (Lvl 1).

For in-depth descriptions of these Skills, please examine your Skills tab.

For unlocking two Skills at the Novice rank, you have been awarded 100 Exp.

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Ding!

Congratulations! You have reached Character level 2!

Your Health, Stamina, and Mana, have all increased by 10 points.

You have 5 free Attribute points to spend.

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Awesome! I can’t help the grin that spreads across my face. I’ve been here for a few minutes at most and I’m already level 2! 'I’ll just close this and go back to… oh for the love of god!'

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Achievement unlocked!

Traveller.

You’ve left your home-world behind you and have set foot on another planet home to intelligent life. Kudos! Here’s a little something that’ll help you talk with the locals (you’re welcome).

Rewards:

• X1 Perk (Gift of gab).

Description: Gift of gab allows the user to learn to read and/or speak any language in its entirety, as long as two conditions are met. First, the user must hear or read at least three words of a new language. Second, the person who wrote or is speaking the new language must have assimilated with the IRLRPG system. Whether people will actually want to talk to you is another matter entirely.

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Reading the new prompt quickly removes any irritation I had been feeling, right until the snarky comments. I sigh, shaking my head. ‘I know snarky notifications are a staple for the books I’ve read, but really?’ I take a moment to consider if the notifications are snarky because I subconsciously expected them to be snarky, but cut myself off before I could get too far down that philosophical rabbit hole. To my surprise, the System seemed to be listening.

0----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------0

You intuited the inner workings small part of the system worked, but wisely stopped prodding before you broke something. Pay no attention to that System behind the curtain!

• +1 Intelligence.
• +1 Wisdom.

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‘So, the System listens to my thoughts, can award Attribute points, and apparently has watched the Wizard of Oz… neat.’ The thought flashes through my mind, but is shortly followed by a sensation that can only be described as ice water directly to the brain. The sensation passes in an instant, but somehow leaves my thoughts feeling sharper and more focused. ‘Is that the increase to Intelligence, Wisdom, or both?’

I Shrug, filing the question away with the conformation that the notifications I receive are personally tailored, and read over the description of my new perk again. The worry of language barriers had been lingering at the back of my mind, but it looked like this Perk would fix that. ‘That’ll help when we actually come across anybody, for now? I’ve got points to assign! I’ll just close this down and… oh come on!!!’

0----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------0

You have received a rooky adventurer’s starter set. The set contains the following:

• X1 Primary weapon.
• X1 Secondary weapon or shield.
• X1 Set of armour (Basic).
• X2 New spells, 1 spell each in your highest 2 affinities.

Please select your weapons, and your armour.

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Sweeeeeet, two new spells! But first, equipment. Focusing on each menu brings up a list of different weapon types. Normally, I’d spend hours uming and awwing over the best possible choices, but I’m the king of the nerds, and thus had spent endless hours considering this very question. In mere moments, I have selected my equipment and confirmed my choice.

For my primary weapon, I select a spear rather than the classic sword. The reason for my choice is simple. I don’t have the first idea how to wield a sword. I am a rank amateur who would be just as likely to hurt myself as any enemies. But a spear? Simplicity itself, just stick 'em with the pointy end ('em being the enemy, not my sister, little 'e' and all that...'). It’s a classic joke, but that doesn’t make it wrong.

For my secondary, I had long ago decided on a ranged weapon. Following the same logic as my previous weapon, a light crossbow would have been the perfect choice. Point, shoot, re-cock, reload, repeat. Luckily, Lisa is an avid archer, and has dragged me along to more than one archery lesson. I am nowhere near the shot she is, but I can certainly hit the broad side of a barn… as long as it doesn’t move around too much. For my second choice, I went with a shortbow.

Third and finally, I look over my armour options, which are chain-mail, leather, or cloth armour. A little note off to the side mentions that there is a penalty to casting in heavy armour, but doesn’t mention any specifics. In the end, I choose the leather set. Much quieter than the chain and without a pesky casting penalty, but better protection than the cloth. The happy middle ground.

The weapons I've selected appear in my inventory, but the armour appears directly over my body, replacing my clothes (which move to my inventory). I shift around a little, testing the range of movement, and am surprised and satisfied by the results. All that is left now were my spells. I wait with bated breath as the System does its thing.

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Scanning affinities… complete.

Congratulations, the use of a rooky adventurer’s starter set has unlocked your two highest affinities. You have unlocked the following Spheres of Magic:

• Life Magic (Lvl 1).
• Water Magic (Lvl 1).

As these spheres of magic were unlocked with the help of an item, you do not earn any Exp. You do, however, learn the following spells:

New Life spell learnt!

• Spell name: Minor Heal (Lvl 1).
• Spell School: Evocation.
• Range: Touch.
• Description: The mage channels the power of Life Magic into the target, curing minor injuries and closing small wounds. The spell costs 10N Mana to cast and heals the target for 5N damage, where N is the spells level. The spell can be channelled for a shorter time to cast the spell at a lower level.
• Cast time: 3 seconds.

New Water spell Learnt!

• Spell name: Ice shard (Lvl 1).
• Spell School: Evocation.
• Range: 15+N metres.
• Description: The mage channels the power of Water Magic into a shard, before firing the shard at a target. The spell costs 5N Mana to cast and deals 5N cold damage to the target, where N is the spells level. The spell can be channelled for a shorter time to cast the spell at a lower level.
• Cast time: 1 second.

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The spells are… a little underwhelming, honestly? But I suppose my journey to master wizard has to start somewhere. Life Magic is not that big of a surprise to me, I always ended up playing a healer during D&D after all, but I hadn’t expected to receive Water Magic. ‘Ah well, walls of ice are almost as cool as flinging fireballs.’ My starting equipment picked. I mentally close the notification.

I begin a mental tirade of mythical proportions as yet another window opens, but the wind is quickly out of my sails as I realise that this is in fact the window I wanted, the level up screen. I am truly tempted to boost both Charisma and Wisdom to 10 at the cost of a single point each, but resist the urge, and instead invest the points in shoring up my weaknesses. ‘2 in Strength, 2 in Constitution, 1 in Agility, Confirm.’

What has to be the weirdest sensation I’ve ever experienced in my life flows through me as I feel my body changing. My muscles don’t grow larger, and yet they somehow feel denser, capable of providing more power. My body feels sturdier somehow, whilst at the same time feeling lighter and more balanced. ‘If adding attribute point feels like this every time, I absolutely want more, what a rush!’ With an eager grin, I glance over the changes to my character sheet.

https://imgur.com/a/gJNBEWn

Progress! That should be everything, Right? I close my status screen, and get a full five seconds to look around at the beautiful forest I now find myself in, before one final prompt fills my vison.

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Achievement unlocked!

Painfully Average.

You have increased every single one of your Attributes to at least 5 points and are now considered incredibly average on your world. Well, you were incredibly average beforehand, but now it's official? Good job, buddy!

Rewards:

• X1 Gold star, just for you.

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I can’t help the laugh that bubbles up from within as I read my new achievement. Now I know these notifications are formed by my subconscious, I can’t help but view it with exasperated amusement. I check my Inventory, and sure enough, one slot is now occupied by the shittiest gold star sticker I’ve ever seen in my life. Grinning like a madman, I withdraw the sticker, carefully peel it, then stick it to the front of my leather chest piece. My sense of spite now satisfied, I settle in to wait for the rest of my family to finish with their notifications.