Netocity’s newest Superhero

They call you The Blimp, because, you know, you’re basically just an indestructible fat fuck with above average strength and practically unlimited stamina. Also you can fly.

Your powers awakened when you turned 18 last week, and after ignoring it for a couple of days, you got annoyed with your neighbors across the street for blasting their music out the window all night. So you went out to pay them a visit in ill-fitted lycra shorts, a bright neon yellow T-shirt, and a blue ski mask.

Some harsh words were exchanged, then people ended up strewn all over the house, contorted at impossible angles. The cops arrived soon after and started hauling your neighbors out of the house. Turns out they’ve been breaking into homes in the area and using that house as a base. They found all the loot in the basement.

Reporters did their thing and you became an overnight sensation. Offers started pouring in and pretty soon, you had to make a choice. You narrowed down the offers to just three:

1. An offer to attend a school for ‘gifted’ youngsters to learn how to utilize your powers effectively and be a for good.
2. An offer from a group of local amateur volunteer crime fighters who call themselves “The Nightwatch.”
3. An offer to join a professional superhero team called “Netocity Nine,” but as a sidekick to one of the nine heroes. Basically, it’s an internship.

As you ponder your future pathways, you jerk off your enormous fat horsecock which was a side effect of your powers awakening…