To find yourself.

You decide that the best course of action, before making any major decisions in your life, is to find out more about your superpowers.

The very next day, you put on an inconspicuous blue hoodie that jives well with your big gut, a pair of loose maroon jeans, and a pair of white basketball sneakers. You then flew yourself downtown to the public superhero testing facility.

Scientists have developed a non-invasive test to scan a person’s body for special wavelengths which they named ‘Superhuman or Transhuman Definitives.’ It was the most widely accepted test available to the public to discover their superpowers and most governments have made it available for free in order to better track the number of Supers in society.

You arrived at the entrance of the testing center. Large banners hung from the walls with the words “Test yourself for STDs today!!!”

You meekly marched through the door, filled and submitted a form at the counter, and went to sit down in the waiting area.

“Tommy? Tommy Dawson?” Someone chirped behind you.

You turned around to find…?

1. A hot chick your age.
2. Two hot chicks your age.
3. Three hot chicks your age.
4. Six. Six totally smoking babes your age.
5. A cock in your face.