Murasaki REMIX, a pervert in an all-girls afterlife.

((Author’s note: I decided to rewrite this thread because I felt like the old version lacked focus and didn’t really have the feel or energy that I wanted out of Murasaki’s story. This was mostly due to lack of planning and foresight. Now I have a better understanding of what I want from this thread, so I think I will be able to tell this story in a way that’s more in-line with what I originally wanted. There will likely be repeated scenes, specifically ones that still work with this altered setup, so bear with me. But don't be fooled, a lot of the "repeated" scenes will have changes that may be important. Lastly, I understand that inevitably not everyone will agree with the new direction I’m taking and to those of you I sincerely apologize.))

Here I was in a beautiful classroom with a high-vaulted ceiling and numerous ornate carvings in the wood. I was seated at a comfortable and large desk with a magic pen that never ran out of ink and a mystical notebook that I could lock so that nobody but me could open it. There was no need for a backpack because I had an extradimensional pocket that I could store things in and retrieve with a thought. I was surrounded by a veritable ocean of women with a variety of both mundane and exotic appearances, but all sharing the common traits of being absolutely gorgeous and either amazingly busty or perfectly flat as a board.

They were in uniform, as this was one of those kinds of academies, but the outfits seemed like they were designed by someone like me. Probably the least objectionable piece of these eutopic uniforms was the belt worn around their waist which made the white blazers with gold trim and milky pink blouses more form fitting. These latter two items, by the way, were tailored specifically to show off cleavage with a criminally low neckline that often went below the breasts.

And their skirts? Psshhh, what skirts? The magenta garment that only barely covered the top part of their thighs was so mini that it basically was just a pleated belt. I lost count of the number of times I had seen the panties of the girls at this academy by happenstance at around fifty, and that was on my first day. Some students wore a small tie around their neck that was deposited in the cleavage of their hefty boobs, but as I understood it, this accessory was not a requirement.

And everyone at this academy was exclusively female with the exception of yours truly. This was a pervert’s paradise.

And I loved it here. Apparently, due to a clerical error, this was the afterlife I had been sentenced to when I died a week ago. I was totally in my element here, even though it wasn’t technically the afterlife I was supposed to go to. In fact, this afterlife, apparently called Melfluere, wasn’t even one of Earth’s afterlives, it was tied to a different world called… Halphor? I honestly didn’t pay a whole lot of attention to lessons around here; I was way too focused on the way too revealing uniforms of the staff and students. I learned very quickly that not a single one of them seemed to care all that much if I stared at them brazenly and without shame. The worst reaction I would get was an embarrassed blush, but never outright anger or disgust. There was only one notable exception to this that I had encountered thus far, but even then the “anger” seemed like it was an act.

Frankly, it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows, a few aspects of me being here by mistake were kind of a pain in the ass. For instance, since this wasn’t Earth’s afterlife, nobody here knew anything about the world I came from and I, likewise, had no idea what Halphor’s deal was. Thankfully, at least on a basic level, the two worlds weren’t terribly dissimilar. This meant that the culture shock wasn’t so bad, and they even seemed to be speaking the same language as me, little as that made sense. Also, being reincarnated in the afterlife hadn’t made me any better at studying, luckily it seemed like I could stay at this school as long as I wanted, even after completing my coursework, so there was no real pressure to succeed.

Oh, how did I die, you might be asking? Well, let’s just say I had a very fateful meeting with a certain Truck-kun. You heard me right, my was a literal cliché on eighteen wheels. I was glad that asking people how they died around here was a bit taboo, I never wanted anyone to know my tragic backstory.

If that wasn’t enough, every person who ended up here was supposed to have a job, like a character class in an RPG, assigned to them by the time they got here. That apparently never happened for me, so I was stuck being jobless and the academy’s administration had no idea what to do about me. I would have loved to be an awesome knight or a powerful mage, then I could have treated this afterlife like a never-ending game of Lairs and Liches, but no. Instead, I was just a guy while all these fellow students got to have all the fun.

Well, at least I got to watch them bounce around in their skimpy uniforms while they practiced. And it wasn’t just the other students who were looking fine as hell, my own looks got an upgrade too. This was apparently because people who come to this afterlife took on their most idealized form.

This, I supposed, went far to explain the discrepancy between bust sizes. Girls that wanted bigger boobs would get them; girls that hated their boobs got to be flatties. Either way I didn’t mind, I was an equal-opportunity perv when it came to lady-chests. Huge honkers were the epitome of softness, but flat was justice! Even medium-sized boobs had the whole perfect balance of proportions thing going for them.

Once again, this was all a dream come true for a pervert like me, right?

Hell to the fuck yes. Even with these drawbacks, the Faerie Arts Academy was like heaven for me. To top it all off, since I was both from another world and also the only guy in school, I was pretty popular. There were a few ladies around here that seemed to find my pervy antics tiresome or annoying, but it seemed most of the fine students were fairly open-minded about it. In the entire week since I’d been here, I’d only been slapped once!

There were even a few girls who seemed perfectly fine with me feeling them up, only a few though; that one slap was well-earned. A lot of them were even pretty flirty with me, but that produced its own interesting problem.

See, the most I’d ever managed to do with anyone was light groping, I’d never had much success with doing much else beyond that. Whenever I brought the idea up with even the most forward of them, they’d have varying reactions along the lines of outright denial, being really cagey, or just politely declining. This had the inevitable consequence of giving me a supremely bad case of blue-balls on a nearly constant basis. I couldn’t even avoid them at this point, because many of them would come to me to flirt.

The ultimate result of this teasing and blue-balling was that I spent many a sleepless night restlessly tossing and turning or furiously masturbating from the day’s erotic exploits. I never had any true release nor any true rest, however, so the lack of sleep was catching up to me over the course of the week.

I peered over at my desk-partner. The ornate and beautifully crafted desks of the academy were sized for two people, and I just so happened to share mine with a real cutie. Her name was Tsuki Hinomoto, she was the class representative and she filled out the erotic uniform of our school very nicely with her amazing curves. Though there was no Japan on Halphor it certainly had an equivalent because she looked like a traditional Japanese beauty.

Long black hair in a hime-cut pulled into a ponytail with a white hair tie, deep and lovely black eyes, milky white flawless skin, and boobs that were frankly deadly weapons in their own right. She also filled out her uniform quite nicely with seemingly a delightful combination of muscle and a small layer of fat that made her look soft all over. I just couldn’t keep my eyes off of her… nor my hands frankly.

“Tsukiiii…” I groaned sleepily and reached over to grope at her chest.

“Eep! Murasaki,” she chided in a whisper and blushed, “we’re in the middle of class.”

“I want to fall asleep nestled in your glorious boobies…” I replied with my own agenda.

“No interruptions!” the teacher, a darkly dressed and raven-haired witch, shouted. She wasted no time in enveloping her hand in a purple-ish black glow and firing the bolt of dreadful magic directly at me. It struck me dead in the heart.

“Gah!” I cried, but nobody else reacted. They were all too afraid to, Professor Morgana Belrose was not a to be trifled with. In my tiredness, I momentarily forgot where I was and who was teaching.

“ be upon thee…” Professor Belorse muttered ominously.

Thanks to my lack of sleep, this was all it took to cause me to instantly go lights-out. I lost consciousness and immediately began snoring and dreaming…

---

I was in a dark void, blackness stretched out in every direction with two exceptions, a pair of spotlights. One of them was centered on me, another was pointing at the only other person in this inky abyss. It was a woman with long blonde hair dressed in what appeared to be a toga. She was sprawled across a chaise-lounge in a disheveled and haphazard manner. Her tits looked fantastic.

I was about to be concerned for this woman, but then I saw what she had grasped in her right hand, a familiar sort of amber bottle. It was beer.

“Uh, hello?” I greeted, not knowing what else to do.

“Oh shit,” she said, looking like I had just woken her from a nap, “hello there.”

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“Fine, fine, just…” she drifted off, and I was about to assume she had passed out before she suddenly and loudly began again, “I’m just drunk everything is all.” She was slurring her words heavily, sloshing through her sentences like water in a flood.

“Oh, gotcha.”

“Who are you again?” she began to stand up, and she was stunningly beautiful. Even her current state of intoxication was having little impact of how amazingly hot she was, although her looking not dissimilar to a newborn deer learning to walk as she stood up wasn’t especially appealing.

“Murasaki,” I smiled as I introduced myself. I definitely didn’t want to get off on the wrong foot with this beauty.

“Oh yeah, Murski. Japanese for ‘green’, right?” She rubbed a slender hand across her forehead and peered at me with bloodshot baby blue eyes.

“Right, Murasaki,” I just decided to roll with the punch on that one, “and it means purple, actually.”

“That’s what I said,” she replied, a dazed look on her face. Okay, she wasn’t just drunk, she was absolutely smashed. “Whyzat name sound so familiar to me… I feel like I’m having a case of… whatsitcalled… Dijon mustard?”

“I think it’s ‘déjà vu’.”

“Right right, yeah, Dijon mustard, like I said.”

I shook my head, exasperated, this clearly wasn’t going to get us anywhere, “Where am I?”

“Dreamscape. I brought you here… for some reason. I was gonna tell you something, but I can’t remember what. I’m Anterose, goddess of uh… something. How ya doin’?”

“Uh, great, actually. I got dropped off in the wrong afterlife, I guess, but it’s an afterlife full of cute girls so I’m not really complaining.”

She blinked this time and then narrowed her eyes, “Wait, what do you mean ‘wrong afterlife’? Ah crap did I do it again?”

“Again?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ve done it before I just… can’t remember when or to whom. Anyway, I guess I should probably bring you to the right afterlife, eh?” Anterose asked and then hiccoughed ominously.

“Please no!” I cried in desperation, “Everyone here is so hot!”

“Oh? You wann stay?”

“Yes, absolutely. I mean, everything isn’t perfect, but it’s like, the perfect afterlife for me. I uh,” I hesitated to bring this up in the face of a literal all-powerful being, “I’m a hopeless pervert.”

The goddess’ face suddenly lit up with shocked delight, “Whoa! Me too! You an’ me should be like, best friends or something. Not like, lovers or anything though, I’m a proud lesbin.” That revelation was simultaneously very disappointing but also very welcome. Either way, interacting with this blonde beauty of a divine being was kinda fun. And did I mention she was hot? I mean like, god damn.

“Okay, as your official bestie forever and always, is there anything I can do to make your after-… afterl-… whatever, even better?”

“Well, I mean, I feel kinda like I’m looking a gift horse in the mouth here just asking for more stuff, kinda awkward.”

Anterose simply waved her hand dismissing the thought, and the act nearly threw her off balance and toppled her, “Issa gift, think of it as an apolomogy for droppin ya in the wrong place.”

“Okay well, I guess it would be nice to have a job like everyone else in the school. Also, it would be nice to know how to get closer to the girls at the Faerie Arts Academy.”

The drunken goddess blinked, “Wait, don’t let me forget about the job thing, but first, wait.” She then paused, and then belched before continuing, “Thanks. Did you say Faerie Arts Aca… Acad…?”

“Academy? Yeah.”

“Bruh, they all horny pervs.”

I had to have heard that wrong, “What?”

“All the different schools are consiss of people who have similar personalities, desires, and goals. I set it up that way… for some reason…” she paused, scratching her head, “… oh yeah! Cuz otherwise Mulflurr can be kinda overwhelming. Always better to go through new experiences with likeminded peeps. So yeah, your school is full for horndogs. Iss actually kinda ser—serend—serundup—… lucky that you ended up there too, being a proud perv yerself.”

Understatement of the century. “You’re kidding! That’s amazing!” This afterlife just got even better.

“They’re also like, lowkey mega horny because they all died without knowing true love, and Halphor’s got a really lax culture when it comes to polymary and stuff like that. Those crazy bastards don’t even have a word for monogamy, it don’t even exist in their culture.”

“Well awesome! That means all I need is a job, and some advice for how to deal with them, then.”

“Yeh, yeh. And as an apology for mixing stuff up, I’ll whip you up something right now, something unique to show you how sorry I am.”

“Wait, that seems like a bad—” I began but was cut off by what felt like a surge of power coursing through my whole body as I was bathed in a bright pink light. When it subsided, I was a bit worried. A drunk goddess had made me a class from scratch, who even knew what would be in this thing? Somehow, I found that I could easily conjure an image in my mind of my stats. It was very surreal to have numerical values attached to nearly every aspect of my being, even stranger was the job’s apparent name.

“Eromancer?”

Anterose giggled, “I thought it was pretty clever. You will have ultimate erotic power at your disposal, no strings attached. Best of all, the more you flirt n’ squirt, the more expurrance you’ll earn. Issa good deal!”

I briefly mentally skimmed all of the class skills, which was also a weird feeling. Like reading a book that was in my mind. Every last one of these skills was something perverted with barely clever titles. That’s when I really thought about this, I didn’t want to be one of those guys who ladies into doing stuff they didn’t want. I was one of those consent-is-sexy kind of guys. “Some of these skills are pretty racy. Are you sure, like, people will be cool with me using them?”

“Whatcha mean?” Anterose nearly fell over again as her balance wobbled and she took another swig of her beer.

“Well, I mean, I’ve been there for a week already and if they’re all as horny as you say, they’re really tame. Like, they’ll flirt and stuff, but I haven’t managed to take it much farther than groping and touching, you know? They all seem pretty hesitant to do much more.”

“What do I look like t’you kid? A character whose only purpose is for expository dialogue?”

“Actually, yes. In fact, if this were an anime or a videogame, that is precisely what you’d be.”

“Oh,” she replied as though this possibility genuinely hadn’t occurred to her, then seemed to get lost in thought.

“Then again, those characters usually aren’t drunk,” I shrugged. “Good job nailing the word ‘expository’, by the way.”

“They’re all virgins.”

I blinked, “Wait, really?” If she wasn’t just fucking with me, that did explain a lot. If they were virgins then it meant they were hesitant because they were inexperienced, probably nervous about messing something up. But that meant I could teach them the ways of being a sexual deviant, I could be their horny sensei! This was amazing!

“Now befurr you go and get too excited there, lil’ bucko, this comes with a couple snags. Can’t just give you total free reign, there are a couple rules you gotta follow. If you don’t follow them, I’ll stick you in an all-male school full of horny virgins like yous.”

Please dear god no, “Okay,” I said, swallowing hard.

“First rule, when it comes to any kind of flirting or sexual contact, you are permitted to take the inishtiv, but no means no. If the girl gives any kind of serious indication that she doesn’t want what you’re doing—and trust me, these girls are not pushovers and will make it clear—you better stop right there and not try whatever it was you did for at least another day. Two strikes and yer out!” she mimicked a swinging motion like she had just swung a baseball bat, which also nearly toppled her.

Honestly, the girls being more than clear was kind of refreshing. It meant I didn’t have to be paranoid all the time that my advances were only being accepted due to some kind of social pressure. Again, I didn’t want to be one of those guys.

“But don’t let this stop you from espermenting, they aren’t gonna hate you if you make one strike unless you bug ‘em about it. And if they let you do something once, it’s a done deal, you can do the same thing with them as much as you want. Also, ackidents are accideks. They ain’t gonna hate you fer ‘em.”

“Sounds simple enough. Don’t be a rapey bag of dicks. I can do that.”

“The other rule is more of a descriptive one, so it’s a rule that you actually can’t break whether you wanna or not. I’m just letting you know about it now so you don’t get surprised. It is a metaphyskul law that any woman who dies with her virginity will be reborn and remain a virgin in the afterlife. Now, remember that I mentioned that everyone in the Faerie Arts Acdem… Acadamama…”

“They’re all virgins.”

“Right, that.”

“So, I can’t have intercourse with them, is what you’re saying.”

“Fraid not. But!” she exclaimed at pointed at me again. Then paused a moment before giggling and staring off into space, “hehe, butt…”

“But what?”

“Uh, that Eromancer class has a skill you can get later that will let you fuckem if you want. But it’s like, gonna be really hard to unlock.”

“Why’s that?”

“Cuz I don’t remember how to do it,” she replied honestly and then hiccoughed.

There was silence as I let this all sink in. That last rule was a little bit of a bummer, but I had always enjoyed foreplay more anyway. And the fact that I could undo it at some point mitigated the downsides quite a bit.

“Okay this ain’t so bad,” I concluded, “I just hope I’ll be able to build up some good relationships with them, I’m a bit worried about not being able to get past groping with them. Is there anything I can do about that?”

“What the hell d’ya think that Eromancer class is for, bruh? For show? These ladies just need to relax and let loose, it’s mostly nerfsness and insecurity that’s holding them back. Yer keystone power will get them to let go of their inbitions for ‘n hour, and even lower them a little permanally.”

This job was sounding better and better by the minute.

“Anyway, there’s more stuff you ned to know, but I can’t remember and I’m slippy. Can I go back to napping?” She asked.

“How will I—” I began but was cut off.

“Okay, bye!” and with that last exclamation, the dream had ended.