Merlin's book of spells, 912th Edition.

Still groggy from waking up, you set the note down and grab the box, quickly opening it to find what appears to be a textbook, not unlike the ones from school. That is until you read the title:

Merlin's Catalogue of Standard Spells and Alchemical Recipes
912th Edition
Average Joe Translation

You stare blankly at the cover, completely baffled. This has got to be a gag gift right? But the book is thick, surely there are only so many jokes you can put in this thing.

You quickly open to the table of contents and skim the various categories. At first you only see categories that sound like something out of a skill-based medieval themed rpg, like _combative, illusion, necromancy, healing, and enchanting_.

But skimming further you see there a quite a few that aren't so on the nose, like_ glamour, transference, cognitive alteration, and even shape shifting_.

It's a lot to take in, and you're starting to get the impression this book wasn't intended to be received as a gag gift. The words of the note echo in your mind, "...Deepest Desires..." And somehow you know this is real, but you need to test it to be sure.