Lets begin! (Martial Path)

Five years I spent up on Mt Pyre. For Five years I honed my fists until they could smash through rocks, and I sharpened my reflexes until I could catch pieces of ash from the air using nothing but a single needle. It took me half a decade to reach my absolute physical peak, and it took half a decade for that to become god damn worthless.

When the Pokémon finally took over, I descended my mountain. My options were fight off the hundreds of creatures that would inevitably be sent up the mountain for me, or calmly walk to the bottom and approach whichever Pokémon seemed to be running the show now. That Pokémon was a Gardevoir with curves like a race track and an ass that could make crop circles if she sat in a meadow. Smooth, pale skin, hips swinging. Did they get more fuckable since I went up the mountain?

Focus.

I stood before her and simply waited. I knew that a Gardevoir would want to take the opportunity to scan the mind of a man so clearly insane, as he stepped towards a Gardevoir flanked by two Magmortar who had already aimed their cannons at me.

"It won't work." I tell her guards. "With everything I have put my body through, your fireballs would feel like an ant bit me." Gardevoir paused... then nodded.

Two Fire Blasts came hurtling my way. I sent an arcing kick through the air, and dispelled the hot flames using the of my kick to distort the air. My head whipped to the Gardevoir as I took my fighting stance. I didn't want to have to fight against Pokémon this way, but this is precisely what I trained for. The first Magmortar Rushed me, flaming fist outstretched. As he came in range, I was easily able to grasp the arm of this reckless assailant, and execute an arm drag that put him face first into the ground, with me now sitting on top of him.

"Why did you leave his arm"? I heard a voice in my head say. "I have seen how your kind fight. They are vicious and may continue stomping even after your opponent has fainted."

I stand up and offer a hand to the Magmortar, who swats it away as he stands and moves towards his leader.

"Most black belts trained to fight other people and Pokémon. I just want to live alongside them on the merits of my body. My spirit."

I hear no mental noise for three seconds. Three of the longest seconds of my life, at which point I collapsed onto the ground, nearly .

"He can resist my mental attacks too? He really is a special one. Throw him in the cart. It's the Arena for him."

The last sight I am treated to is the Gardevoir shapely ass retreating as the two Magmortar collect my crumpled form.