Lean into Tomboy Christina

Very much enjoying this slightly more athletic lilt to Christina's look, you add a few new rules to the book to fit the theme. Almost as much as you love petite women, you also like tomboys. If this book could turn Christina into one... well, A little more can't hurt.

You're writing in pencil anyway, so you can always erase a rule when you want things to go back to normal.

OLD RULE: Petite women dislike shopping for clothes. They're confident in their looks without relying on perfect wardrobe selection.

OLD RULE: Petite women are natural born athletes. Their compact size lends them superior energy efficiency, and their wiry little bodies are springy and resilient. While they may have less muscle mass on average, pound for pound their muscles are stronger than that of non-petite individuals.

OLD RULE: All petite women are raised to be tomboys almost exclusively, with social circles during formative years primarily including boys and other tomboys.

Oh yeah. This is a world you can get behind. The world blurs around you.

In a snap, a subtle ripple flows through Christina's body as the new rule takes hold.

Your girlfriend's soft arms and shoulders suddenly become toned. At the same time, Christina's skin tans to a beautiful golden color, while her hair shortens into a wild pixie cut that's sexy in a without-even-trying sort of way.

The woman's outfit shifts accordingly - the sleeveless shirt thins into a sporty tank top, and her yoga pants rearrange themselves into a pair of camouflage cargo shorts, secured with a cool snakeskin patterned belt. Her long legs (at least in proportion to the rest of her bite-sized body) tighten, becoming no less toned than her arms.

You blink at the new Christina, and marvel. God she's hot. Your erection surges suddenly, forgotten for a moment, but not forever.

Unexpectedly, however, Christina shies away from the attention. She folds her beautifully toned arms self-consciously over her chest. "Dude, why do you keep looking at me weird?"

The transformation leaves you disoriented. "Since when do you ever say dude?"

But it's Christina's turn to be confused. "Like since always?" she says, frowning and taking a sip of her coffee. "You feeling okay Nick?"

Not a mocha. It's just a straight black coffee she's drinking. You can smell the bitterness of it from where you sit.

"Yeah... yeah I'm fine," you say absentmindedly.

Those last rules about petite girls definitely changed something. Glancing around the coffee shop, you notice a short girl with big boots kicked up on the table, eating a big bagel, who definitely wasn't there before. Or was there a business woman on her laptop sitting in the same spot?

Whatever the case, you would've noticed this new girl come in. She's petite, with a wild mane of blonde hair, dressed casually in a sports bra and a pair of parachute pants covered in pockets.

"You sure?" asks Christina, her tone uncertain as she observes you staring the midriff-baring blonde to your left. "Cause you're spazzing out right now and it's low key freaking me out."

You turn back to your girlfriend, wonderfully curious about the new world you've created for the both of you. "Rough morning I guess. I promise I'm fine. Pinky promise." You offer your pinky in a cutesy little gesture as a sign of goodwill.

However, Christina recoils at the offer. "The hell? Put that thing away, are you gay or something?" Heads turn your way at her outburst.

Woah. Your relationship dynamics must be way different than before. You pull away before you cause a scene - you've never actually dated a tomboy before, this'll obviously take more adjustment than you expected.

You crack an easy smile, acting for a second like you're with just another one of the guys. "Just messing with you. Sorry Christina."

Tomboys are into taking it easy, right? You're very worried.

"Now you sound like my mom," says Christina, gagging. "It's Ris. Not Christina."

Ris? You almost ask what Ris is, but you catch yourself. It must be a nickname. Short for Chris? You didn't think it got shorter than Chris. But there are a ton of Chris's out there, so maybe it makes sense? Perhaps in this world there's a higher demand for boyish nicknames due to the influx of tomboys, and society's scraping the barrel...?

You manage a chuckle and try your best to play along. Keep it easy man, don't screw this up. "Like I said - I was messing with you, Ris. Can't you take a joke? I call you Christina one time..."

Christina - or Ris, as she demands to be called now - takes exception with you mentioning the other name again. "Seriously. You haven't called me Christina since we were ten years old," she tells you, very annoyed now. "Are you drunk? I didn't think they served liquor here. How many did you pound back before I came in?"

"Ten years old?" you ask, taken aback. You met Christina a few months ago on a dating app.

But Ris apparently lived through a different version of events. "Yeah, in fifth grade when I started going by Ris," she reminds you, speaking slowly in case you really are drunk. "Only Mom calls me Christina anymore, and only when she's pissed."

Not only is Ris a tomboy, apparently in this new, clearly superior world, she's your petite tomboy childhood best friend! Screw going back, this is heaven. Your whole body hums with excitement - and you've got a date tonight, too!

"You have no idea how hot you are right now," you say.

Ris burns red. "H-hot? Forget ****, you've gotta be on ****," she says.

"What's wrong with me saying you're hot?"

She shakes her head so vehemently, almost the whole of her body shakes with her. "What's wrong with it? What do you mean what's wrong with it?" demands Ris, almost panicking. "First off, you're basically like my brother or something - second off, I'm a lesbian -"

You burst out laughing. While you've never had sex with Christina, you've made out a dozen times. There is nothing gay about the way she strokes your chest or moans when you bite her lip.

"I don't care what timeline you're from. You are so not gay," you say.

Tomboy Christina tries to form words with her mouth, but fails. She does turn red up to her ears, though.

You must not be dating yet then. You're friends, which is something, but you can't help but feel a sense of loss for the slow build of intimacy you've been working on for months now with her.

You realize too late that this whole time, you've been burning bridges you can't easily rebuild (well, unless you erase some rules and revert to the original timeline...). For all you know Ris really is gay in this new world.

"Sorry. Ris. Maybe I did have a drink or two," you say, hoping you can smooth this over. "I shouldn't have said anything..."

Ris takes a minute before answering. She can barely meet your eye for shame. "How did you know?"

"How did I know what?"

"That I wasn't gay," she says quietly, looking around like she's afraid someone will overhear

The real answer is the Rulebook, but that won't fly here. The other real answer is your own experience.

"Because I know you, Ris," you say, leaning in. "You want to touch guys. You want boys to kiss you. What I don't understand is why you'd lie about it."

She fidgets with her coffee before draining the rest of it. "W-well... remember in the 5th grade?"

You don't, but you humor her. "Of course."

"You took Mei out on a date..."

Mei. Vaguely, you recall your first 'date', which was really a supervised trip to the carnival with both sets of parents and a girl you sort of thought was cute. Long hair, amber eyes. "That was so long ago," you say.

"The next week you asked what was wrong..." Ris trails off.

"Because you were crying," you finish. Not because you remember, but because your former girlfriend looks about ready to cry right now by recalling the event.

Ris gives a small nod and clutches her hands into fists on the table. "I told you back then it was because a girl didn't like me but, um, that's... it's not what I meant..."

You realize what she means. Ris liked you. And not just back then.

The revelation is... underwhelming, to say the least. Christina, your girlfriend, likes you? Shocker. The real surprise is that Ris, apparently, has been pretending to be gay so she could be your best friend for your whole life without scaring you away. She basically reverse friend zoned herself. This is possibly the dumbest social conundrum you've ever found yourself in.

Fortunately there's an easy solution for both of you.

You reach across the cafe table and seize Ris's dainty, yet tough hands. You're not used to this may calluses on her fingertips, but holding her hands is easily familiar. She looks up at you in shock.

"Do you still like me?" you ask.

Ris swallows. Her inability to move or look away from your eyes is all the answer you need.

"Well, I've always thought you were hot," you tell her, uncaring of what past evidences in this life may or may not suggest. You didn't live it so it doesn't apply to you. Your life is yours and you can do whatever the hell you want with it.

"But - but I'm not even girly or anything," Ris says, highly alarmed. "I'm a petite, I'm flat and I look like a boy and -"

You shut her up with a kiss. It's short and right on the mouth, but it paralyzes Ris completely. When you pull away, she halfway comes with you, reflexively trying to extend the contact as long as possible. She's left stunned.

"I like petite girls," you reveal dramatically, like you're admitting some dark and wonderful secret, "and I like tomboys. I've got a thing for both." Maybe that makes you a rare commodity in this world? You really have no idea how this works.

Ris's eyes go wide as headlights. "Wh-what? How?"

"I'd be happy to show you how, but only if you agree to be my girlfriend," you offer.

Asking Christina to be your girlfriend again was never a problem you thought you'd have to deal with, but when life gives you lemons, you take them.

Ris jumps up from her seat and throws herself bodily against you, crushing you in a hug so fierce you're looking at two, three broken ribs easy. You try your best to endure.

"I didn't think this'd ever happen," sobs Ris, tears of joy streaming down her face. "I won't let you down, I swear."

You rub your new/old girlfriend's back and hold her tightly to your chest, uncaring of who sees. "I know you won't," you whisper in her ear, nuzzling in and enjoying her warmth. Christina would be perfect either way - of course she would - but for some reason, you've got a hunch that as Ris, Christina will be a whole lot more accommodating in your new relationship than she used to be.

Added to that, you have a leg up on Ris. Months of dating Christina. Years of dating and relationship experience that she's now lacking. How could this get any easier?

So, about that date...