Kevin Burgmeyer - A 37 Year Old Forever DM

Kevin stared in astonishment at the scene in front of him.

“It’s—no, it can’t be–”

The vista Kevin was looking at was familiar in an impossible way. It had only ever existed in his head before, though he had spent many a long hour trying to find a way to bring it to life in the mind of some friends, relatives, and an increasingly wide selection of strangers.

He was standing on the top of an aged stone wall covered in moss, as he looked across the roofs of the small medieval town it surrounded. At the far side, locked behind a portcullis and an even higher wall, was a castle, its towers and spires rising high above the city below. Banners flew from several of them, displaying an array of stylized mythological beasts on backdrops of bright primary colors.

“Oh, but it can be, Kevin Burgmeyer.”

Kevin whirled at the sound of the voice in his ear. Low, seductive and promising, it conveyed breathy excitement and tempting allure all at once, and sent shivers down his spine at the same time as all of the hairs on his arms and back did their best to stand at attention.

It also scared the shit out of him, since he’d had no idea there was anyone else nearby. He could see townsfolk below as they went about their daily lives—carrying laundry, carting firewood, shoeing horses—but the top of the wall had been empty a moment before.

He stumbled back precipitously, almost tumbling off the twenty foot drop behind him, only to be saved by the shockingly strong grip of the woman who had suddenly spoken.

“Careful now, Kevin. We went through a lot of work to set this up, it’d be a shame if we lost our star now.”

“But this is—this is Adventuria. I made–”

“Not the most creative name there, was it?”

“I was twelve when I thought of it. Look, what the hell is going on?”

The woman flashed him a smile that could’ve melted steel. She was tall—taller than Kevin by a few inches even before counting her heels. With those on, she was well over six feet in height, which meant his face was practically buried in her chest when he regained his balance.

Since she had more curves than a mountain road and was wearing nothing more than a skimpy chain mail bikini, Kevin flushed red, started hyperventilating, and quickly scrambled off down the wall to create some distance.

The woman flashed him a megawatt smile. “What’s going on is that you’ve been selected.”

It’s only then that Kevin is finally able to see past the massive tits, thick thighs, and long pale legs to the other features of the woman in front of him. To the small batlike wings that sprout from the center of her back and extend out to either side. To the three inch long curved horns that poke out of the waves of raven hair that fall to either side of her flawless face.

To the tail that lashes back and forth above her perfectly full ass as she cants her hips to the side as though posing for a camera.

And perhaps she is, because words appear above her head, floating bright and unsupported as the letters carve themselves into shape as though drawn by the quill of a medieval scribe.

HAREM HOTEL: DUNGEON CRAWL EDITION

“Welcome, Kevin, to Harem Hotel’s first ever Dungeon Crawl!” As she spoke, music filled the air around him. It started as a fanfare of trumpets, then quickly shifted tone to become lively and upbeat—the kind of music he would have played for the first session of one of his games, when the players were first meeting in a tavern.

“You’re a–”

“A succubus! I knew we picked the right guy. Those hours spent studying myths and legends are really paying off, eh? Anyway, Hi Kevin, I’m Lily, and I’ll be the host for this season of Harem Hotel. And let me tell you, I think we’ve got a fun one lined up for you–”

“What’s happening? How did you bring me here? I was at home, eating–”

Kevin’s attempt to interrupt Lily suddenly cut off as his mouth closed itself at a gesture from the host. His eyes widened in shock, only for the succubus to saunter across the distance he had opened in his panicked flight earlier.

He tried to back away, only to find his limbs frozen and unresponsive as Lily bent at the waist—flashing a fantastic view of the pale curves of her ass in the process—and shushed him unnecessarily with a finger laid across his lips. “Hush, now, dear Kevin. We’ll get to all of that in time. You, of all people, should know how obnoxious it is when someone interrupts your carefully prepared work.”

The look on Kevin’s face showed signs of terror, but he also couldn’t keep his traitorous body from reacting at the overtly sexual display from Lily. She glanced down to where his pants had tightened, smirked, and straightened once more. “Now, as I was saying, we’ve lined up something special for you. You may already be familiar with our regular seasons–”

Kevin did his best to shake his head, but found himself locked in place as Lily began to slowly walk circles around him. He was not the most impressive specimen of manhood—barely average height, slightly overweight, hair thinning, and a scraggly beard that just didn’t ever seem to fill out—and being positioned next to the exaggerated curves of the succubus did him no favors. Neither did the rumpled t-shirt that proclaimed ‘You can certainly try.’

“Seven women compete with each other for favorable positions in the harem of the season’s master—some man that they all share a connection with. Yawn.” Lily held up her hand to her mouth as she said the word, then stepped in behind Kevin and bent over. He felt her tits smash up against his back as her lips found his ear.

“But Kevin here is already a Master. In fact, he’s a forever Master.” Lily’s hand slipped into Kevin’s pocket. From the outside it was not obvious what she was doing, but Kevin’s eyes rolled back in his head at her touch and without the magic locking his muscles in place he might have collapsed. A moment later, the succubus pulled her arm back to reveal a small purple velvet pouch.

“A forever Dungeon Master!” Lily tugged open the cords that held the pouch shut, then poured the contents into one hand. A small collection of dice was revealed, in a variety of different colors and shapes. She held them up to an invisible camera as she continued, “Poor Kevin here has a problem—for all of his life, he’s enjoyed playing tabletop roleplaying games. Ever since he was a kid, in fact. He loves it—some might say he lives for it, but–”

She straightened, which placed her breasts on either side of Kevin’s head to frame his shocked expression. He had given up on attempting to speak or move, but his eyes darted left and right as he did his best to figure out what was going on with his suddenly limited field of view.

“–he never gets to just play. Every time he sits down with his high school friend group, with his family, even when he went to forums online to find a group, in order to find a game, he had to be the one to run things. To put the plans and maps together, to create the setting and populate it with vibrant characters for his players to enjoy.”

She gestured towards the small town laid out below them. “This is Adventuria. A land of mystery and myth, legend and lore, avarice and adventure! All of it pulled from the mind of Kevin, and then–” Lily turned towards the invisible camera once more and gave an exaggerated wink, “–given our own special Harem Hotel twist. And Kevin, well, I’m sorry to say that you’re stuck playing the role of the Master again, only this time we’ve made sure you’ll get plenty of play!”

Kevin gasped as the **** holding him was suddenly released. He stumbled forward away from the succubus and turned to face her again. “This isn’t even possible! Am I dreaming? Did I get hit by a truck and these are my last dying thoughts?”

“No, Kevin, truck-kun isn’t on this season—though you’ll find that the crystal ball in your room picks up more than a few channels, maybe you’ll find time to check out some past episodes. But if you think this is fantastic, just wait until you meet your harem!”

“Wait, harem?”

“You know it, Kevin.”

“I don’t, actually.” To Lily’s surprise, Kevin regained enough composure to close his eyes and take a deep breath. When he opened them again, his expression wasn’t exactly calm, but he managed to keep his tone level and meet her gaze with only the barest of glances towards her overly abundant chest. “If you’re going to expect me to DM, I’ll need to know the rules and the system. Is there a rulebook somewhere?”

Lily’s megawatt smile returned, showing bright white teeth with slightly extended canines. “As a matter of fact, there is. Now, the intention here is that you just get to come along for the ride and have fun, but we can’t have a Dungeon Master who doesn’t know the rules. Watching someone read is a bit boring, though, so while our players are going to have to read their own handbooks, for our dungeon master, you get your own special guide.”

The succubus raised a hand to reveal the tips of her fingers ended small but wickedly sharp claws. She wove them in a rapid series of motions which trailed golden light through the air as she chanted what sounded like nonsense to Kevin. When the spell was done, the light exploded into a shower of glitter which puffed over his face and then dissolved.

“What the fuck, that’s actual magic, I–” He blinked a few times, and then gasped in wonder. “I understand. You’re going to bring them all here and–”

“For the viewers at home, What I’ve just done is give Kevin one of those things he brings to all of his home games: an encyclopedic knowledge of the rules.” Lily kept her aside to the camera brief, then turned her attention back to Kevin. “But yes, you’re right! You, our lucky Dungeon Master, are going to be joined by seven women selected from across the globe, who will be competing for a position in your permanent party. It’ll be up to you to lead them, to guide them, to leverage your expertise to bring home the treasure.”

“Treasure?”

“Of course! What’s a dungeon crawl without some booty?”

Lily emphasized her point with a sharp spank across her own ass that cracked like a whip, yet failed to leave so much as a mark on her flawless pale flesh.

“That’s not all, though. In addition to the gold and magic items you retrieve along the way, of course, your girls will be competing for that most valuable resource of all: XP. If you’re a fan of previous seasons of Harem Hotel, you may be more accustomed to Victory Points, but in the dungeons, experience matters. The girls who do well in the challenge will be rewarded experience, while the ones who fall behind will—well, you’ll see, but let’s just say the dungeon might not be lethal, but that doesn’t mean it’s kind to failures. Falling behind puts a competitor at risk of befalling a more permanent fate that might see them eliminated from the party entirely.”

Lily waved her hand dismissively, “But I’m sure that with your expert leadership, you’ll be able to whip them all into shape, right?”

Kevin let out a nervous laugh. “Um. Sure.”

“Now, to keep things entertaining you aren’t going to get to know how all of the challenges that you face work, but let’s just say that it’s possible the knowledge you have about some planned encounters you had in mind might just come in handy.”

“But you said you changed things—gave them your own twist?”

Lily’s smile turned mischievous. “We can’t have things get boring, can we? We’ve tried to make sure the challenges you face are, let’s just say, Harem Hotel appropriate, but we’ll get to that in time.

Kevin drew in a deep breath. The knowledge he now held spoke not just of the rules, but also of the overwhelming power of his hosts. Of not just Lily—whose power here was already impressive—but also the producers who now held his very life in their hands.

And above even them, the audience.

“There’s no getting out of this, is there?”

“Would you want to get out of a life of fantasy, adventure, and hot babes literally begging to bang you?”

The breath left Kevin in a long sigh as he steeled himself. “If it’s an option, yes. Let me out, let everyone else go home. Magic is fine, but you—you’re talking about bringing a bunch of women here and then magically compelling them to sleep with me. That’s—that’s not okay.”

“Hey, hey, Kevin, you can’t say this isn’t a fantasy you’ve had. I mean you literally can’t right now, I’ve turned off your ability to lie.”

“I mean—yes, but what happens in my head didn’t hurt anyone. Also, the reality show twist isn’t mine, my fantasy usually revolved around finding a way to travel from one fictional universe to another helping women solve their problems.”

Kevin looked utterly mortified at the words escaping his own lips, but despite his best efforts he was unable to prevent himself from speaking.

Lily walked around to next to him on the wall and nudged him with her elbow. “Then just think of the challenges like a problem to solve, work with your party, and see what happens next. So, Kev, are you ready to meet them?”

“Do I have a choice?”

“Sure don’t. First up, it’s–”

Lily carefully poured the dice back into the bag and shook it, then held it out towards Kevin. He sighed, resigned, and reached in to pluck out one of the dice.