Just the Diversion

"Uh, Miranda...?" Jack asked, just as confused by her girlfriend's sudden outburst as the other four women and the varren in the room.

Miranda took a deep breath. Truthfully, she had actually been planning on doing this, just next week on the tattooed woman's birthday. She had everything all planned out, too. Dinner at Jack's favorite restaurant, a romantic walk under the moonlight, a twenty-six round romantic romp in bed, and then dropping down to one knee right then and there. But now that Jane and Liara were almost caught in an embarrassing situation and she had blurted out the first excuse in her mind...

"You owe be BIG TIME for this, Jane!" Miranda thought bitterly as she cleared her throat and stared up at her girlfriend's face.

"Jack." She began, using the very speech she had rehearsed over and over again in her mind. "I remember when we first met, how much I wanted you out of my life. But ever since we became us, I couldn't imagine my life without you. You are my life, my entire world, Jack! I want to spend the rest of our lives together with you. I want to raise a family with you."

Despite seeing her girlfriend's eyes beginning to water, Miranda could also see Jack's confusion at what the former Cerberus agent was doing.

"A family, Jack!" Miranda said, ad-libbing from her rehearsed speech a bit. "I want to have children with you that we can raise together. I want to have moments where I stifle a giggle from you scolding them for swearing, or getting a tattoo. And to help scold them when they," her eyes gestured towards the direction Jane and Liara were in, "sneak around behind their parents' backs. You know?"

Jack finally connected the dots, her eyes still watering as she nodded, much to the confusion of Hannah and Aethyta; neither parent looking behind their backs as Jane and Liara quietly snuck past them to the stairwell.

"You are the love of my life, Jack." Miranda continued on, returning to her carefully planned speech. "Without you, I wouldn't want to live anymore. Hell, I couldn't live anymore without you! So, with my very heart and soul, I ask you again, Jacqueline Naught? Will you marry me?"

Jack let out a mixture of a sob and a chuckle as she brought Miranda up to her feet and shouted, "Oh, hell yes, I will!"

The two women embraced happily as Jane and Liara made it up the stairs, Aethyta and Hannah smiling at the new couple.

"Shepard and The Blueberry owe us big time for this?" Jack asked in a hushed whisper.

"After breaking into our house, putting us in an awkward situation with their parents, and forcing me to push up my proposal date from your birthday to now, thereby ruining the perfect romantic evening I had planned for us?" Miranda whispered in reply, "You bet that sexy, tattooed ass of yours they do!"

"It almost reminds me of my husband's proposal." Hannah, commented before adding, "Except I was five months pregnant with Jane when he popped the question."

"Geeze!" Aethyta commented as she finally turned around to see the broken vase on the floor. "That pet of yours really likes to rough house. Where is it, anyway?"

"Oh, Eezo?" Jack asked, wiping the tears from her eyes as she cleared her throat. "He should be right -"

However, Jack and Miranda turned to see that the varren was now gone from the living room, leaving the chewed up skillet behind. The two new Brides-to-be gave each other a worried look, having a good idea where the varren had gone off to.

Jane and Liara slipped into the bedroom, the human racing to the closet as the Asari raced to the dresser drawer.

"I'm happy for them, Liara." Jane commented, pulling out one of Miranda's catsuits and holding it up to her body. "But I've got a feeling that we're going to be owing them big time for this."

"I just hope we get invited to the wedding after this." Liara said jokingly as she pulled out a pair of Jack's boxers, "But right now, let's finally get -"

A playful growl interrupted Liara as the naked lovers turned to see Eezo standing in the doorway, tail wagging as blue biotics crackled and radiated off of him.

"Not again..." Jane and Liara groaned simultaneously.