Ivan (he believes in ghosts, right?)

"... let me get this straight. You, Ethan, and your best friend, Cedric, who until yesterday would ridicule anyone who believed in ghosts and the supernatural, are calling me regarding a ghost-based emergency that you guys would like me to help you take a look at as soon as possible."

"... yeah."

"One that you guys absolutely refuse to explain over phone, text, or mail."

"... right."

There was a moment of silence before Ivan spoke again.

"Is this some kind of prank? Because it's not a very believ-"

"NO! No, it isn't! We really need your help!" Ethan protested.

"We're serious about the ghost thing!" Cedric chimed in.

"This is really sudden, though. You've always been very dismissive about this stuff. What even brought about this... this..." Ivan paused as realization dawned upon him. "... ah. This has something to do with the graveyard, doesn't it?"

"If it was... would you be able to help us?"

Ivan sighed. "Fine. I'll entertain the two of you. But I'm at my parents' for the weekend cause my Nana's here, so you'll have to drop by."

"That might... might not be..."

"Look, Cedric, my Nana's come from out of state and this is the first time in years I've seen her. I'm not planning to leave."

"Erm..."

"Plus, my Nana's the one who actually knows about ghostlore, anyway. She claims she's studied them. If you really want someone who can help, she's probably the one."

"..."

"I'll text you my address, okay? Tell me if you're coming. See you guys, maybe. Bye!"

"Wait, Ivan! You-...! Fuck, he hung up on us," Ethan cursed.

"So... are we going?"

"... do we have a choice?"

Cedric sighed. "Doubt so."

"... fuck."

"Let's hope nothing happens on the way there."

"Yeah, it would be pathetic if we got pulled over for dangerous driving or something and it's because of this fucking ghost."

"Here's some wipes. Clean up that mess you made."

---

Of course, before they could head over to Ivan's, the boys had to head back to campus to get a change of clothes. Unfortunately for them, it was now slightly past noon. There was more traffic on the road than before, and Cedric's Camry, with its un-tinted windows, offered other motorists a good view of its interior. Several motorists honked as they passed, and one middle-aged lady in an SUV even slowed down so she could leer at Ethan.

"Fuck," Ethan cursed as he rummaged through the glovebox fruitlessly. "Where are your sunshades?"

"Why?"

"To cover the windows, damnit!"

"Why?"

"Hello? I'm not wearing anything?" Ethan turned away from the window and covered his groin with one hand while searching the car with the other. The lady's face took on a look of obvious disappointment as she picked up speed again.

"I thought you were perfectly fine being naked. You were pretty eager to show off earlier." Cedric was feeling a little less than charitable thanks to Ethan's stunt with his cum.

"Yeah, but there was nobody else around then!"

"Glad to know I'm the only one you'd consider doing nude shows for," Cedric laughed.

"...fuck off. That's not what I meant, and you know it." Ethan had given up on searching the glovebox and was now running his hands around the seat with one hand while shielding his groin with the other. "Where are your damn sunshades?! Weren't you gonna get new ones?!"

"Haven't gotten them yet," Cedric said gaily. "I was gonna pick 'em up soon... but looks like my procrastination's paid off."

"... Ced. Come on, at least give me Adrian's shirt or something."

"I'm driving. You'll have to wait for the next red light... which might never happen," Cedric smirked.

"Gah. Forget it, I'll go hide in the back-" Ethan said as he unbuckled the seatbelt and clambered up and over the armrest. Cedric watched in amusement as he caught sight of Ethan's firm butt, as pale as the moon, nicely framed by the rear view mirror...

... then blanched as Ethan abruptly threw himself face-first onto the back row, revealing the cop car traveling behind them, which chose that very moment to turn its lights on.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck..." Ethan muttered under his breath, hoping against hope that he hadn't been seen. The boys had no such luck, however; as Cedric slowly switched lanes, the cop car kept the same distance and followed behind him.

"DAMNIT! Ethan, why couldn't you have waited?!"

"You're blaming me?! I wasn't the one fucking about with my best friend's modesty!"

"I wasn't the one being a humongous cocktease!" Cedric shot back as he came to a stop on the road shoulder and switched off the ignition before rolling down both windows on the driver's side. The cop car quickly pulled in behind them, its lights still flashing.

"I'm not the one being petty!"

"Shut up and think of a cover story!" A stocky man clad in the navy-blue uniform of the county sheriff department leisurely exited the police vehicle, book in hand.

"For what?!"

"We can't say we were fucking around in the graveyard with no clothes on, can we?!"

"Gimme the shirt!" The cop was only a few feet away now.

"It'll look weirder if we're both half-dressed! Plus he can see everything we're doing; we'll just look even more guilty!" Cedric's hands were glued to the steering wheel.

"What are you gonna say?!" Ethan demanded frantically.

"I don't know, maybe you lost all your clothes in a dumb bet?!" a flustered Cedric retorted. "Now shush, and don't say anything!" Both boys fell silent as the cop approached the driver's seat.

Cedric lowered the window and flashed a slightly tense smile at the cop - he'd never been pulled over before. The officer was a pale, clean-shaven, thickset man who looked to be in his early forties, and whose expression was completely unreadable. "Afternoon, officer."

"Afternoon, son. I'm Officer Brown. Do you have any idea why I pulled you over?" The cop asked, his voice stern.

Never admit to anything... "... no, sir."

The cop raised his eyebrows. "None at all?" He gestured at the naked Ethan in the back seat with his hands over his crotch, then at the front passenger seat.

"... no sir, I don't," Cedric said, a hint of nervousness colouring his voice.

"Well, I'm sure you know that it is mandatory for front seat passengers to wear a seat belt, and I saw your friend behind there climbing from the front seat to the back while you were driving. Certainly saw other things I'd rather not have seen, too."

Cedric maintained his silence. Behind him, Ethan stared off into nothingness, still as a statue.

"Your name?"

"Cedric Anderson."

"I'm gonna need your driver's license, registration, and proof of insurance."

"They're in the glovebox," Cedric replied. "May I..."

"Go ahead. Keep your hands where I can see them. How about you?" The cop directed the question to Ethan.

"Ethan Michaels." he replied mechanically.

"And where are your clothes?"

"I'm... I don't think I have to answer that, sir."

Officer Brown sighed. "Look, Mr. Michaels. I have a job to do. You and Mr. Anderson could cooperate, in which case I could just write him a ticket for the seat belt infraction, and we can all be on our way. Or... you could make this difficult, in which case, I could also write another ticket for reckless driving, thanks to his obstructed... eh... rear view mirror." One side of his mouth twitched upward as Ethan's cheeks pinked just the faintest bit. "And given your lack of appropriate clothing, I could probably justify hauling your ass back to base for public indecency, too. I bet the guys back at the department would get a good laugh out of that."

Cedric could feel Ethan's nervousness radiating through the car.

"So... let's try this again. Where were you before this?"

"A friend's place," Ethan fibbed.

"What were you doing there?"

"We were... having a games night."

"Friends from college?"

"... yeah."

"Ah. I remember those years. Hanging out after hours, some booze, some gambling, some ****. Crack was popular among the brothers back in the day. Guys would wander out of the frat without realizing they had nothing on. That kind of games night, Mr. Michaels?" Officer Brown asked as he meticulously copied down Cedric's particulars.

"Oh, no, sir. Not a frat, and nothing so wild," Ethan responded, recognizing the trap for what it was. "Just some board and card games."

"A board game resulted in you losing all your clothes?" The cop's eyebrows were raised so far, they threatened to disappear underneath his fringe.

"... strip poker," Cedric quickly added.

"... hmph," Officer Brown snorted, and both boys relaxed marginally. "Guess we found last night's big loser."

"Yeah," Ethan laughed uneasily. "When the ladies said they were playing for keeps, we didn't expect they'd take it quite so literally."

"And there was no ****?"

"None at all."

"Didn't expect to be on the stripping end, eh, Michaels?"

"Not at all, sir," replied Ethan.

"Bet the girls had a wonderful time."

The conversation petered out into silence again.

After a few seconds, the cop pocketed Cedric's documents and said, "Right, gentlemen, I'm afraid I'm going to have to search your car."

"Sorry, officer, but I do not consent to that search," Cedric responded almost instinctively.

"What's in that bag?" The cop pointed to the white, tied up plastic bag of wipes they'd used to clean up their cum earlier.

"It's just, uh... used wet wipes."

"What did you use them for?"

"Oh. Um. For... for cleaning up."

"I see no food, no drink, and nothing else that could cause a mess."

Cedric and Ethan shared an embarrassed silence.

"Hiding something, are we?"

"Not hiding anything, sir. I just have the right to not have my car searched. Fourth Amendment." Cedric's voice carried a slight undercurrent of nervousness, which the officer quickly latched on to.

"Mr. Anderson, you and I both know that you are well within your rights to refuse. But if you wish to drag this out... do remember what I said earlier. Mr. Michaels may soon find himself in a world of trouble." He retrieved a pair of handcuffs from his pocket and tapped one end of it threateningly against his wrist.

"Just let him, Ced," Ethan hissed.

"Look, Ethan, I'm pretty sure he can't lawfully-"

"I don't care, I do NOT want to risk being dragged to the police station while naked!"

"But-"

"I'll give you three seconds," declared Officer Brown. "Three. Two. ONE-"

"CEDRIC!" Ethan's left hand gripped Cedric's arm painfully tightly.

"OKAY! Okay, okay," Cedric breathed. "You can search the car." He whipped his head around to glare at Ethan, who looked defiant.

"Right, I'll need both of you gentleman to exit the car, please."

Cedric quickly got out of the car. Ethan, on the other hand, had a distinct 'deer-trapped-in-headlights' look about him.

"Oh... uh... could I stay..."

"Out. Now. The longer you stall, the longer I'll make sure this takes."

Ethan, hands over crotch, moved to get out of the car. As he went past Officer Brown, the cop struck like a viper - quick and deadly. Before Ethan knew it, his hands had been wrestled and cuffed behind his back, leaving his front completely exposed.

"WHA- OW! Sir?! What-"

"Don't worry, Mr. Michaels. I'm not arresting you... for now. This is just to ensure neither of you escape when I search your vehicle. If you're good, I'll let you go at the end of the search. Otherwise... well, that public indecency charge will definitely stick, now."

Ethan gulped audibly. His earlier startled shout had attracted the attention of several passers-by, some of whom were staring, pointing or wandering closer, clearly intrigued by the naked teen. He faced the car and hunched over, mortified, trying to make himself take up as little space as possible.

"Can I... pass Ethan my shirt?" Cedric asked tentatively.

"Please do." The only saving grace about the situation was that Officer Brown didn't seem to be enjoying himself at their expense at all.

Cedric quickly removed Adrian's old tee and tied it around Ethan's waist from behind, resisting the urge to let his fingers slide lower as he knotted it. The resultant loincloth was just barely enough to cover Ethan's dick, but left practically all of his firm, muscular butt on display. Don't fucking think about Ethan's ass right now! Cedric chided himself mentally, even as his own cock stirred, threatening to tent out his shorts.

While Officer Brown started to do a thorough search of the car, an anxious Cedric and an embarrassed Ethan looked on from outside. Having been pulled over in the inner suburbs, there were a number of people and shops around; Cedric looked about and saw that several people were watching from a safe distance, the sound of their murmurs now audible as they discussed the scene - two young men, one topless, the other near-naked, restrained and wearing a ridiculously small t-shirt loincloth that left very little to the imagination. Ethan tried to duck behind Cedric, but as Ethan was taller and broader, he did not have much success.

"You idiot," Cedric hissed as the officer rummaged through the glovebox. "I'm like ninety-nine percent sure he couldn't arrest you or even drag you back to wherever!"

"Didn't you hear the cop earlier?! He was going to do it anyway!"

"He probably lied!"

"You were gonna risk me getting hauled off to the station on the off-chance that he was lying?!"

"It's in one of the amendments or something! Cars are private property so you were safe! But now, now that you're out here he probably actually can arrest you for indecent exposure!"

"You sure?!"

"Yeah, quite! I'd maybe get a fine, but that would be all!"

Ethan hung his head and groaned in despair. "Fuck. Fuck my life. Fucking hell."

"... I have no words other than that you brought this upon yourself."

"... shut the fuck up."

A very awkward silence ensued, until Cedric heard a vaguely familiar voice yell loudly and excitedly, "Oh my god, ETHAN MICHAELS! Why the fuck are you naked? And handcuffed?!"

Ethan cringed, clearly recognizing the owner of the voice. Cedric turned and saw a tall lady with an hourglass figure, an ample bosom, and silky, brunette hair that ran down to her chest and shimmered in the sunlight. Her face was carefully made up, with nary a blemish on her smooth ivory skin. She wore a burgundy blouse and dark blue denim jeans, and gave off an air of being well-cared for. She would have been quite good looking - except at that moment, her face was twisted in cruel amusement, and her smile did not reach her eyes, which were fixed upon Ethan from six feet away.

Oh shit, Cedric realized. It's his ex, Diana!

Diana was on the arm of a tanned young man in his mid-twenties. He was built almost exactly like Ethan - broad shouldered, muscular, and nearly as tall - and was dressed in shades of grey and blue, which matched his cold, electric-blue eyes and blond hair. Cedric did not recognize him.

"Let me introduce you to Jay, my new boyfriend. Jay, this is my ex, Ethan. You know, the one who I told you skipped out on a date with me in favour of his other boyfriend." Diana's voice easily covered the distance between the two parties.

Jay smirked as he took in Ethan's state. "Pleasure," he drawled. "I'd offer to shake, but given the current circumstances..." he gestured at Ethan's near-nudity.

"That's not what happened, and you know it," Ethan hissed furiously, fire in his eyes as he glared at Diana, his hands straining against the cuffs as his chest flexed. "Calling a last minute date knowing I had other plans just to 'see who was more important'? Faking an emergency so I'd drop everything to rush over? You dumping me over that was a fucking blessing."

Oh, so THAT'S why they broke up! He never did tell me the specifics... and now I do feel a little bad.

Officer Brown was now looking through the back seat, methodically working his way to the plastic bag. He appeared to be indifferent to the situation outside.

Ethan turned to Jay and snorted. "You wanna date this ****, manipulative bitch? Just remember the bro code."

"Which is...?" Diana pointedly asked.

Ethan looked straight at Diana and spat out, "Bros before hoes."

Diana gasped loudly and theatrically, one hand dramatically covering her mouth. "How DARE you call me a hoe when you're the one putting your ass on display in broad daylight?!" she practically shrieked, catching the attention of people who were even across the street.

Ethan quickly lowered his head to avoid being recognized. "Just... fuck off," he sneered.

"Why should I? This is the most fun I've had in a long while. Though..." Her face suddenly morphed into a wicked grin as her eyes swept up and down Ethan's well-defined body. "... though... not as fun as the last time we had sex."

Jay, Ethan and Cedric's heads shot up, taken by complete surprise. "Babe?" Jay asked, sounding confused and slightly alarmed, his eyes darting between Diana and Ethan. "Why are you..."

"Isn't that right, Ethan?" Diana purred, her voice becoming deep and husky. "Don't you remember our last time? How you fondled my boobs and ran your hands over my ass? How tight, how right you said my pussy felt wrapped around your throb-"

"SHUT UP!" Ethan hissed desperately, shuffling closer to Cedric's back.

"-bing dick? How wet I was for you, how warm, how wonderful it felt as I squeezed my legs together..." Diana's hand went to her chest, and she surreptitiously squeezed one of her boobs. Jay was eying Ethan with a murderous glare... and Cedric finally realized what Diana was trying to do.

Judging by the slowly growing pressure Cedric felt against the back of his thigh, she was succeeding.

"Come on, Diana," Cedric tried to distract her. "You've got another boyfriend who you're clearly happy with, Ethan's single, not to mention this..." he vaguely gestured in the direction of his car. "Surely that's eno-"

"Don't get me started on you," Diana rounded on him. "You're just as responsible-"

"For being good friends with Ethan?! Surely that's a bit-"

"Yes! He should have wanted to be with me!"

"He did!"

"Yeah, right; I dumped his sorry ass because he chose you!"

Behind him, Cedric could hear Ethan mumbling something about ugly naked grandpas under his breath as the tip of his growing member poked out from under the loincloth and pressed ever harder into Cedric's buttcheek. Despite the tense and awkward situation, Cedric felt himself being enveloped in a comforting warmth much like one of Ethan's hugs... and the corner of his mouth twitched upwards unconsciously. Diana, of course, caught sight of it.

"And of course you're pleased by that!" She threw her hands up in disgust. "Ugh! Go fuck each other already like you so obviously want to!" Addressing Ethan once more, she taunted, "But just so you know, there's no way his ass and his flat chest are gonna send you to heaven like I can! You're gonna miss these girls and this ass, not to mention the mouth that had you screaming my name as I went down-!"

"Is there a problem here, Miss...?" Officer Brown had finally exited the vehicle, plastic bag in one hand - and not a moment too soon, for Ethan was now desperately sticking close to Cedric, trying valiantly to hide his now rather exposed and still rising boner by pressing it against Cedric's ass, which itself was also causing Cedric to get slightly excited. Clearly, Diana had been very good in bed if Ethan's reaction to the memories were anything to go by, and both Ethan and she knew it.

Diana immediately and deliberately relaxed her tone. "Oh, nothing much, Officer," she laughed. "Just putting an ex in his place."

"... right," said Officer Brown, frowning slightly. "If there's nothing, I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"Sure," Diana said. "We were just on the way to lunch, anyway... unlike this boy of yours, who looks like he should be on the way to county jail." She took a step back. "Come on, Jay. Let's leave these losers."

Officer Brown turned to Cedric and Ethan once more. "What is this, gentlemen?" he asked, fishing out a wipe from the plastic bag, which was clearly gummed together by some sort of sticky white liquid. Cedric and Ethan both turned red. Behind Officer Brown, Diana stopped and turned, and as she saw what the cop was holding, a truly frightening, thunderous expression came upon her face.

"Um..."

"Uh..."

"What would I find if I tested it? Some sort of ****? Angel dust, perhaps?"

"No! It's..." Cedric struggled to get the words out. "It's..."

"...CUM!" Diana shrieked, somehow having made it back within six feet without any of them noticing. She raced past Officer Brown before he could react, grabbed Ethan by the shoulders, and shoved him backwards. "YOU ASSHOLE! Were you-" *shove* "-already fucking-" *shove* "-your little BOYFRIEND-" *shove* "-THE WHOLE TIME we dated?!"

Ethan, caught by complete surprise and unable to physically respond, stumbled once, twice, then fell down onto his ass before rolling onto his back, his cuffed hands trapped underneath him. "OOOF!" he exhaled, momentarily winded. The loincloth flipped upwards, fully exposing Ethan's erection, which by now stood straight as an arrow and pointed directly towards the infuriated lady standing over him. Around them, the various passers-by exclaimed - some at the twist in the drama, some in shock the blatant display of arousal, others in appreciation at finally getting to see the handsome young man in his full glory.

Diana glared daggers down at Ethan while he tried to get up, his chiseled abs flexing and his soles scrabbling along the ground, his cock quivering as it saluted her. "You were even JUST grinding him, you FILTHY, STINKING, BASTARD!" she screamed, taking a step back before launching her foot forward -

*THUD*.

Ethan's reaction was slightly delayed, as if his brain was taking some time to process what had just happened - but then his eyes bulged, he keeled over sideways, and he let out a a long, raspy groan as he curled into a fetal position.

The crowd winced empathetically.

---

Within five minutes, two other officers had arrived on the scene. One, a female cop, was taking down Diana's personal information, while the other had draped a thermal blanket over Ethan. Cedric had one hand on Ethan's lower back, preventing the blanket from being blown away, and Officer Brown was profusely apologizing to Ethan, who, having been uncuffed, was still laying prostrate on the floor with one hand on his aching balls. The crowd had dispersed with the arrival of the new officers, while Jay stood by Diana, looking very unsure of what to do as she sniffed and sobbed.

Probably having second thoughts about his relationship with that deranged lady, Cedric thought.

"Well, whenever you boys feel up to it, you're free to go," Officer Brown said. "Mr. Anderson, I'll still need to give you that ticket, but everything else is in order. Just remember to pay the fine on time and you'll be alright... and once again, I'm extremely sorry for what happened to Mr. Michaels today."

"Can we... can we keep the blanket?" Cedric asked. "To, you know, avoid... other..."

"Yeah... actually, you know what, it's nearly time for me to go off duty. If you guys were heading back to campus, I could probably escort you..."

"Thanks, but I think we'll be okay... Ethan, can you get up yet?"

Ethan shakily pushed his himself onto his knees while Cedric hurriedly wrapped the blanket around his waist. He gingerly got to his feet, took a step forward, paused, closed his eyes - and threw up all over the pavement.

Cedric resisted the urge to facepalm as Ethan sank back to his knees.

---

The trip back to campus in the car had not been a fun one for Ethan - every bump on the road added to his nausea, and he retched once or twice more on the way back; thankfully, there was nothing else for Ethan to throw up. Cedric then had to race back to their room to get clothes, race back down, wait for Ethan to get dressed, then help him stagger back up the stairs and into their room - all while fielding inconvenient questions from dormmates who were wondering what the rush was and why his clothes were so ill-fitted. Pretty soon, the whole dorm "knew" that Ethan had lost all his clothes in a racy game of strip poker, then got assaulted on the street by an insane ex. After several questions about how hot the girls were, some gentle ribbing, and the occasional attempt at a lovetap, the two boys finally got to Ethan's bed.

"They're... a little swollen," Ethan groaned, collapsing back onto his bed, dressed in a tank top and a pair of boxers, one hand still grabbing his nuts protectively as he stared blankly at the ceiling. His broad shoulders hunched unconsciously, as if trying to anticipate and guard against any future potential **** on his family jewels.

"I could get some ice or something," Cedric said, making to stand up.

Ethan winced. "God, no. That'd probably feel worse."

"Need me to take you to the clinic?"

"... don't be dramatic. I'll be fine... eventually."

A brief moment of silence followed before Cedric spoke again.

"So... Diana dumped you because you were in love with me?" Cedric asked, his lip quirking up as he turned to face Ethan.

"You make us sound like some sort of love triangle," Ethan snorted weakly.

"Oh, but you do love me."

"Fuck off," Ethan said, but Cedric could hear the undercurrent of laughter in his voice.

"Was this the Yosemite trip thing?"

"Yeah. She told me she had some family emergency and she desperately needed me there."

"And...?"

"Turns out she just wanted to see who was more important. She accused me of not loving her and dumped me after I yelled at her."

"... sounds like you dodged a real bullet."

"Yeah. She was beautiful and great in bed, but... well, you saw."

"I saw plenty," Cedric teased, then paused before saying, a smirk on his face, "Felt plenty, too."

Ethan blushed. "Well, I had to hide it..."

"Pity you couldn't have pressed it into my crack instead. That would've hidden it much better."

"... if you really want my cock, you could just ask."

"... really?"

"... dream on." Ethan reached out with one hand and flicked Cedric's forehead.

"Ow!"

"Horny boy."

"Says the guy who was caught having a raging erection in public."

Ethan cringed. "I really, really, REALLY hope nothing puts anything online..."

"... yeah. And we really have got to sort this shit out."

"We head over to Ivan's first thing tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I guess so."