Isekai

You awaken in a dark void, hearing the voice of a beautiful anime woman. Waves of pleasure shoot through your form (you feel as if you no longer have a body, there are no aches or pains) as you hear the kawaii tones of this goddess with brightly coloured hair.

"Great hero, you are just about to be born into the land of Generica. The people there are calling for a saviour."

"You mean I'm dead?" You feel hollow. Empty and shapeless.

"Yes, but you get to reborn as a hero in a magic world." she says, her voice full of excitement.

"But I'm dead."

She looks at you quizzically, as if she's never seen anyone bummed out this much before.

"Great hero?"

You sigh. "I'll never be able to see my family and friends again. There's so many people I never said goodbye to. There are friends from High School who I was too afraid to get back into contact with, now they'll be left with a hollow feeling."

"It's okay. In the magical fantasy world of G-"

"It's okay? It's not okay. My life wasn't going perfectly in my old life but I still knew things would get better. Now there's nothing. I'm just a traffic accident statistic. I had a cat for Christ's sake."

You look at the sexy kawaii anime goddess. Her breasts are large and her outfit is revealing.

"You're definitely not Jesus Christ. Was that all a lie? Is our god, who put us through so much suffering but also so much joy from a flavour of the month anime? What cruel bullshit."

She pauses, thinking you've finished. She clears her throat and once again speaks in a kawaii but reverent tone.

"Other great heroes-"

"And do you have to condescend me? Am I a fucking baby? What heroic deeds have I committed? What great potential have I shown? How pathetic is the world you're sending me too, that it needs someone like me to save it? You know who was a hero? My Grandmother, who stole ammunition from the fascists in Italy and smuggled it to the partisans in the countryside. My Mother, who raised several kids on a single income. Although this isn't really any kind of reward."

"Can you stop? I'm just trying to do my job." Her tone and voice changes, resembling a minimum wage worker trying to avoid the **** of an older person asking why their discount card doesn't give them everything off.

You feel bad, and form into a curled up ball.

"I'm sorry."

"Listen, I'm sorry that you passed away. Maybe you should just take a few moments to relax. I have an idea."

You notice her beauty, but sex is the last thing on your mind. Or soul-form. You've just lost everything, and now you've harassed an innocent person trying to do her job. She seems to be doing something magic, as a glowing blue ball shines throughout the void. You ruminate on your life. You should have been ****. Why did you spend so much time on the computer? In this void, there is no grass. No air to breath or fragrances to smell. No touch. You're not even sure if you're seeing the kawaii anime goddess or if you're just knowing that she's there, and recognizing her form. All you have are emotional feelings in your being itself. But without a brain, how can you have memories? How can you feel so miserable? Is being miserable so intrinsically you, that it stays with you in every form of existence?

"Here, look at this" she says, her tone casual.

In the blue orb, you look and you see the people you loved in a series of flashing images.

Your ex-girlfriend, she attends your funeral and cries. She cries a lot. At her job, another coworker tries to cheer her up. The two of them kiss. They get married and adopt children. They grow old together.

Your best friend also cries, and begins drinking a lot. He spends more of his time in bars and clubs. He hits rock bottom. He starts to exercise, and goes back to school. He gets his degree and starts working with underprivileged youths, and you watch as he changes their lives for the better. He never marries, but at the end of his life he is missed by his community.

You watch your parents. Your Dad, who had left when you were a toddler is now back, and he embraces your Mom. The two cry together, and hold hands. He's changed, and begs for her forgiveness. The two of them get married again. You watch as they live out their retirement on the coast. Their lives are peaceful and happy.

An internet friend manages to get published, and his books are turned into an unpopular TV show. A coworker manages to revolutionize the pasta world with a new type of sauce. Nurse Chen's ship of warriors is tragically defeated at the hands of her enemies.

"So what's your point? And what was with that ship battle? Is that real?"

She seems to ignore those questions. "You are loved, and you were an important part of many peoples' lives. It's hard to accept, but life moves on. Just as they had all lived full lives, you will too."

You don't really know how to feel about all of this.

"Do they also get sent to Generica when they die?"

"It's different for everyone. You have great magic potential, almost godlike."

"Then fine, let's get to the fantasy world."

"Perfect, now let's start by making your stats!"

"My what?"