I stole her gym thong

{if tom_fired = false}

"It is possible an angel has acquired the thong that Victoria wore to work this morning..."

His jaw dropped. Then it formed a shape to say something but nothing came out for a few seconds. "Fuck... in that gym outfit she had... aw damn... That is hot as shit. How did you... I mean the angel get it?"

I shrug. "If it was just laying around in the office, an angel might just pick it up and pocket it." Tom is looking a little flustered. But that is probably how I looked when I was holding it in my hand.

"Um... is the... angel willing to sell it?"

I make a dismissive frown and shake my head. I get a powerful jolt every time I remind myself that I actually have it. In my pocket. Right now. I don't want to give it up. Tom opens up his wallet and ruffles through some bills. "I have seventy dollars on me if it is available."

{else}“Victoria couldn’t shower at the gym today, so she came to work in a sexy-ass gym outfit. Killer yoga pants and sports bra, covered in fine sweat.”

“Fuck! I wish I had seen that.”

“Our friendly angel managed to acquire her damp gym thong.”

“Mmmm... Fuck. I’m not gunna lie. I’d hate fuck a hole in that right now. Would the angel... sell them?”

I hesitate. “What are we talking?”

“I can deliver $200 in an hour.”{endif}

That is a reasonable offer.