I let Kiara read Mia’s letters

When Kiara and I got back to the Dark Dragon guild, we both went to my room. I searched my desk for the letters I had received from Mia and then I gave them to Kiara to read. I’m not sure if Kiara really can get some information out of which I already haven’t. Then again, she’s a woman just like Mia. Perhaps there is something my male mind just read over.

“Ok, excited with her ranking ceremony. That’s pretty usual.” Kiara muses aloud when she reads the first letter. “Crusader too. She has a right to be proud of herself. Those are rare.”

Then Kiara cocks her head and asks, “Hmmm, I take it Fabe and Cal are not friends of yours?”

“No, I regularly got into fights with Fabe. Cal was just his lackey. Fabe also thought he could **** Emma to be with him by beating up Oliver.” I explain.

“Your friend from the inn? I see.” Kiara replies. “Usually, it is bad form to mock fellow adventurers for having a low rank, but these two seem like they would use their abilities for all the wrong reasons.”

I wanted to add more to that, but suddenly Kiara said, “Oooooo, so you two and Mia were ‘that’ close.”

She must have gotten to the part where Mia describes pleasuring herself while thinking of me.

“If this is how close you two were, then it is only natural to feel hurt when she switches to someone else.” Kiara continues while she flips to the next letter. “Even more so if she switches while you are apart from her.”

“Those 6 months that we were apart. My feelings for her were what kept me going. Why I continued training.” I explain. “Meanwhile, she had already forgotten about me.”

“Doubtful.” Kiara says. “She was happy enough to come to the castle to see you as soon as she discovered you were training there. Same for when she saw you in the store and she felt really upset when you didn’t feel like talking to her. I feel she kept thinking about you even after she switched boyfriends.”

Right, so at least I wasn’t out of her mind. I guess what Roland said about her wanting to stay friends is at least true.

“Wanting to master fire magic, going on adventure, very nice.” Kiara muses aloud again. “Missing you hard dick. She was still very much infatuated with you when she wrote this one. I’d say this letter is before the switch.”

Then all of a sudden, Kiara starts snickering. I don’t recall having seen her do that before. The snicker then grows into a laughter and finally Kiara lets herself fall onto my bed and start laughing even more.

“Something wrong?” I ask.

“No, no it’s … this letter … it’s … bwahahahaha!!!” Kiara tries to say, but when she takes another look at Mia’s 2nd letter she starts laughing uncontrollably again.

I decide to wait and let Kiara get it out of her system. The problem is, every time she is about to be done laughing, she takes another look at Mia’s 2nd letter and she’s back to laughing in full ****. Eventually, I decide to take the letter from her. That way she can’t recharge any more.

“Aahhh, by the goddesses.” Kiara says when she’s finally done. “I don’t think I have ever laughed this much in my life.”

“So, what was so funny?” I ask.

Kiara snickers once more, making me fear she’s about to start laughing again. Then she says, “Nipple imprint.” And she’s back to outright laughter.

I shrug and ask, “Yeah, what about it?”

“Darx.” Kiara says with a big smile on her lips. “Girls do not send their nippfwhahahaha … We don’t send those to just about anyone. If we do, it is only to those people that we are very much in love with.”

I take a look at Mia’s letter, more specifically the spot where she placed her nipple.

“So, there really was true love?” I ask sadly. “And then it died.”

“I don’t think so.” Kiara says as she gets out of my bed. “I think Mia still has affection for you. Why else would she be so eager to see you or so happy to talk with you? I think it’s more like she still has affection for you, but her affection for Roland has grown to even higher lengths then what she has for you.”

I wanted to look Kiara in the eyes, but her hood keeps that part of her face in perpetual darkness. Instead, I look at her mouth and say, “So what. Her love for him overshadowed her love for me? Like, the reason I lost her is because I was not around while he was? That if only we left for Riledo together, we would still be a couple?”

“That is quite possible.” Kiara answers. Then she takes the next letter and returns to sit on my bed to read it.

Is that really all there is to it? Is a six-month separation truly all that is required to end a relationship? I remember there was a moment where I became used to not having her around, but I still loved her. Then again, I did not have any girl around trying to seduce me. What if there had been? Would I have done the same as Mia and fall in love with someone close and convenient?

“Oooww. Ow, this letter is so full of pain.” Kiara says. “Was she crying when she wrote this?”

A painful letter from Mia? I don’t recall any of those.

“Which letter are you reading?” I ask.

“The opinion you have of me, means so much to me. Simply the idea that you would think less of me make me feel all depressed.” Kiara reads.

“Ugh, that’s a letter from Amelia, not Mia.” I groan.

“The girl who came to both the castle and the guildhall to try and talk to you, right?” Kiara mentions. “Looks to me like she feels incredibly guilty over something.”

I sit next to Kiara and tell her about Amelia. How she and I were childhood friends, how we entrusted all of our secrets to each other. Then, one day, Kase came into our lives and all of a sudden there was this huge secret she never wanted to divulge. Like she had suddenly become a different person.

“You think she and Kase were hooking up behind your back?” Kiara asks.

“I don’t know. Maybe. It’s the only thing I can think of that would explain everything.”

“Suppose she did and she didn’t hide it. Would you have been fine with that?”

I take a moment to think about it, then sigh and say, “No. From the very first time I met Kase I had a bad feeling about him. As I got to know him better, that feeling kept reinforcing itself.”

“Perhaps Amelia noticed that and was worried about your opinion of her new lover?” Kiara suggests.

“No, Amelia already told me she never loved Kase.” I reply. “She once even told me she hated him.”

“If she hated him, then why do you expect her to have had sex with him?”

Kiara’s questions leave me all confused. She is right, of course. Why on earth would Amelia have sex with a guy she hates. It doesn’t make sense. But then why would she always act weird whenever Kase was around? That too does not make sense. Ugh, I don’t know any more.

Kiara then looks back at Amelia’s letter.

“Well, from the way I see it, I have a feeling Amelia feels really guilty about something and wants a chance to make up with you.” Then Kiara looks at me and continues, “For that to happen, you of course need to be willing to give her a chance to talk. As long as you refuse to hear whatever she has to say, she will never be able to confess any of her secrets and you will remain confused about her forever.”

After that, Kiara left Amelia’s letter on my desk and left the room. I guess she felt it was the right time to leave me with my thoughts and let me think it over.

Fine then, I recline on my bed and start thinking about Amelia. The biggest problem in thinking about Amelia is that there are 2 Amelia’s. One, the old Amelia from my past whom I would love to have back. Two, the new Amelia who has been deceiving me. Though if what Kiara told me is true, then that might mean there is now a third Amelia, one who wants to return to being the 1st and have things go back to how they once were. But she wants to do that by continuing to keep all her secrets. I wonder, am I able to let is slide? Can I even get over the whole deception part and not let it bother me in the future?

But as I read Amelia’s letter again, my eye falls on the part where she says that if I know I might hate her for it. I am not a hateful person. Amelia has known me for my whole life. She should also know that I am not quick to hate. So, if she believes that what she has done will make me hate her ... then it must be something big, right? Now I start to wonder. Do I really want to know? Maybe letting it go is the only way to go back to how things were?

Oh, this is so fucked up! I turned my back on her because she wouldn’t tell me the truth, and now I’m wondering if I can even handle the truth!

Do I want to make up with Amelia? Yes, I do.

Do I fear the truth might make me hate Amelia forever? Yes, I do.

Is it possible for me to let Amelia keep her secrets and pretend nothing ever happened? I guess I could.