Humiliation

He's right, this is a humiliation. To accept that this is happening to me is one thing. To move beyond that to asking for it is something more.

Begging? Begging is a unique kind of humiliation, wrapped up in the twisted mind of this absolute asshole of a man. Begging reduces me to nothing more than a puddle, nothing more than a servant to his needs.

Because Blake needs this as much as I do. He wants it just as much as I do.

But even more, he still wants and believes that he can break me and gain a little ground in this intimate chess game that we're playing.

This doesn't reset the board back to where we were before today. But he's slipped out of the trap that I laid for him and guaranteed that the game is far from done and the victor is far for certain.

I'm going to beg him. I need to beg him.

Because more than gaining a victory over the bully who made my life an absolute and utter living hell, I really just need to get fucked.

"Fuck my ass, please," I start, my voice near a wail but far more urgent somehow, "I need you to fuck my ass. I need you to spread me apart and fill me up with that big thick cock of yours. I want you to grab my hips and push it into me. I want you to stretch me open and show me how much I can take."

From his silence it's clear that it's not enough. I know what he's looking for, what he wants me to say. But I maybe can get away with a little less.

"I want it. I want to feel it. I want to know what it's like. I want... I don't want to get fucked, to lose my virginity, but it's getting so hard to keep it intact. Minute by minute I fantasize about it. I've almost... so many times. A few times I even was willing but... but... but I can't get fucked. I can't get fucked like that, there. I can't... but I can come close."

Still silent. I press on.

"This is the closest I can get. It's the closest you can get right now too. Tell me you don't want it, want to know how it'll feel. To push into my tight little virgin asshole and feel it so very snug around your cock. Feeling me tense as you enter me, barely able to take it and so afraid that it'll hurt until it doesn't anymore. It'll be good for you, good for me too. We both want it so please? Please? Oh god... please..."

I can't. I can't take another moment. I need it and I'll... I'll go too far.

"Please make me into the good little slut I know I am. Right here in this filthy alley. Pressed up against this brick wall moaning while you grunt your cock inside of me. Grab me and make me take it. Treat me like the... like the whore you know I am in the heart of me. Make me a whore, Blake."

But still he's silent. I think I can feel him getting antsy, but still he's waiting.

So I say the one thing I know will end this torment.

"Break me, Blake. Break me."

Practically sobbing for it now, I beg with all of myself.

"Break me. Fuck my tight little ass and break me in."

Blake steps up. I feel him press against me. I feel the pressure.

And then I feel it happen.

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