How To Respond

It took us about an hour to regain our composure. I’m left feeling somewhat numb, along with this impending sense of dread and doom. Even with the extra time Elsa bought us, can I really do enough in 3 weeks to even get close to Mathias’ level? It’s a terrifying thought, and I hate that Mathias is right. I can’t leave random people to die. Not if I can avoid it.

In the hour since Mathias called, I checked on both Paige and Belle. Paige did not seem okay in the slightest, but she asked us to let her stay in bed instead of trying to get her up. I’m worried about her, but I’m not sure if there’s anything I can do at the moment.

Belle asked to be left out of the situation for the moment. She said she needed time to cool down. I’m not sure the details but it’s pretty obvious that her and Olivia had some kind of fight. She didn’t leave the barrier though, which is saying something. I’m hoping she wants to help us.

Paige got out of bed long enough to move herself up to our bedroom. Everything about the way she moved and interacted with us has me worried. Her sluggish movements, downcast eyes, the complete lack of energy or happiness at seeing any of us. It’s like the light is gone in her. None of us know what to do except leave her be for the moment.

Besides Belle and Paige, we’re all gathered in the living room. Mia, Ivy, Skylar, Olivia, Emma, Lena, Elsa and I. Eight of us. None of us really know how to start the conversation. After a minute or two of silence, I gather my thoughts and begin to speak, just kinda letting my thoughts tumble out in the hopes that I say something coherent.

“I don’t really know how we’re going to deal with this. I don’t really have any kind of a plan of action or anything. I know I’m supposed to be the leader here, but the only thing I can really think of at the moment is to see if we’re all on the same page.” I say, looking around at everyone’s faces to see their reactions.

Olivia is nodding. “I think that is a good place to start. We were not unified last night.” She puts forward her two cents. Mia casts her eyes down in shame. Elsa looks over at her sympathetically, and Ivy rubs her back to comfort her. “Emma, Lena, Elsa.” I say, getting the attention of the three of them. “I wanna hear your thoughts. You three don’t need to stick around if you don’t want to. This doesn’t need to be your fight.” I tell them, offering them an explicit chance to stay out of this.

Lena looks insulted at my words, which I didn’t expect. Emma looks a bit uncertain, and Elsa has an unreadable expression on her face. “Why would you say that?” Lena asks, and I’m confused at her reaction. “Look I….haven’t known y’all for very long. I get that. But these past few weeks have been something special. Y’all are a group of oddballs, and I finally feel like I’ve found somewhere I can fit in.” She continues.

“I-” Lena’s voice breaks, so she clears her throat and keeps going. “I’ve spent 3 years hiding a part of myself from the person I care most about in the world, because of some stupid rules from the world. You changed that for me. Ya gave silly ol’ me a place to stay. Ya saved me and protected us from the dickheads out there.”

Lena glances at her girlfriend next to her. Emma looks back at her with a sad smile. “I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you. And I’ve never felt like I belonged with a group of people more than this one.” The water mage says, shooting Mia a meaningful glance. “I care about y’all. So if I can help, even just a bit, ya better believe I will.” Lena affirms.

“You say y’all too much.” Mia jokes, her eyes filled with tears. Lena chuckles, looking down. I spot a tear running down her cheek too. The water mage takes a few deep breaths, then looks back up at me, her expression resolute. “This is my fight.” She asserts. Emma squeezes her hand, smiling sadly at her. Lena squeezes back.

Emma spares a worried glance at the doorway to the stairs, which I note. She’s almost as worried about Paige as I am. The tattooed sapphic takes a deep breath and begins to speak. “I can’t say I’m as sure as Lena is. I’m scared. I’ve known about all this for less than a month. It’s a lot for a girl to handle.” She says, breathing shakily.

“But I care about you too. And I care about helping others. I don’t know what difference I’m going to be able to make, but I wanna try. It kills me to know what people out there are going through, and if I can make a difference, I wanna try. And there’s no way I’m leaving y’all to do this without me. I’m here. I’m queer. Get used to it.” She says, with a faint laugh, her voice quivering. Lena puts an arm around her. Emma holds onto her girlfriend for support.

I nod slowly in acknowledgement, giving Emma a reassuring smile. She smiles back shakily. I look to Elsa, who shifts nervously. “I um…” She begins in a soft voice. “I’m not really used to talking in front of so many people outside of work…” She says, taking a breath to steady herself. Mia smiles at her encouragingly. “You got this.” The aeromancer says gently.

Elsa nods, taking another breath in, and continues. “When I got that phone call last night, I was really scared. I didn’t really know what to do, and the thought that Mia had…you know…and I wasn’t there to help or anything…” She admits, her gentle voice shaking. “It sucked. It really really sucked.”

“I’ve been thinking about it all morning. Ever since I became a Fateweaver, I had to turn off my emotions to the conflict around me. As a Fateweaver, we aren’t allowed to pick sides. If we do, we can’t be a part of the Fateweaver guild anymore.” Elsa continues.

“But last night, driving my car over to help you girls, thinking somebody I really care about was gone, and then suddenly I get a call and find out she’s alive, but running out of time. I…I felt sick. I felt helpless…” She trails off, sniffing. “And it all turned out okay, and I’m really grateful about that.” Elsa says, clearing her throat.

“But I don’t ever wanna feel like that again. I don’t wanna get another phone call telling me that somebody I care about is gone and I could have helped but wasn’t there.” Elsa says with resolve. She looks at Mia, staring at the aeromancer for a few seconds, before looking down and sighing.

“I can’t do that again. I don’t really know my thoughts on what you girls are trying to do. I’ve ignored a lot of that stuff for my own sanity as a Fateweaver. But I won’t lose the people I care about. I love being a Fateweaver, but I care about you more. I’ll join your guild Gemma.” She concludes.

I raise my eyebrows in surprise at her words. "Are you sure? This is a big decision." I ask her. Elsa chuckles. "Believe me, I know. I'm giving up my dream job for this. Almost everything in me is saying that this is a dumb decision. But my heart says I need to be here. I'm not going to ignore that. And it would be heartbreaking if I didn't do this, and something happened and I didn't help." Elsa admits.

I nod in understanding. I know what she means. "Looks like you’ve got an admirer." Lena jokes to Mia. Elsa blushes at her words. The aeromancer makes a half hearted attempt at a smile. "Why wouldn't I? I'm just that-" She starts, but her voice breaks. "-amazing..." Mia finishes, her confidence faltering.

"Are you okay?" I ask Mia, concerned. She tries to smile again and nod at me, but it's obvious she's straining herself. She looks down at the ground and hides her face in her hands. "What's wrong?" Elsa asks gently. Mia's shoulders begin to shake. Ivy pulls her into a cuddle as I hurry over to her side.

"I fucked up! I'm so sorry, I fucked up so bad last night!" Mia sobs, still covering her face. "Shhhh babygirl, it's okay. Mistakes happen." Ivy coos gently. "My mistake nearly got me and all of us killed!" Mia cries, the guilt erupting from her voice.

"Hey, it's okay. We live and we learn, alright?" I do my best to comfort her. Mia doesn't respond, letting it all out instead. All the guilt, the stress and tension from the awful past day. We comfort her the best we can, holding her and letting her cry it out. Elsa brings her some tissues, and she blows her nose with one.

"I'm so sorry. I pushed you all away by being stupid, then rushed into a fight and nearly died because of it." She says, now a bit more coherent. "Yeah but it's-" Ivy starts, but Mia cuts her off. "Please just...listen. I need to say this." She says. Ivy nods and falls silent.

Mia gathers her thoughts. "I've been getting stupid and overconfident. I...I thought we were on top of the world and nothing could stop us. And I nearly died because of it. I nearly lost the people I care about most in the world. I'm so sorry. I'm going to be better." She promises.

"We believe in you Mia." Elsa tells her. "Yeah!" Lena agrees. "We're here to support you. We love you." I say. Mia looks around at all of us and smiles, for real this time. "Thank you all." She says, blowing her nose again.

With Mia now mostly calm, I send Elsa the guild invitation window. She looks at it, studying it for a few seconds, before taking a deep breath and pressing the accept button. She nods at me, and I smile at her. "Just how powerful is Mathias anyway?" Lena asks. A pain shoots through my stomach. That's the part I've been dreading thinking about, and dreading telling them.

"He's level 299." I admit after a pause. There's a sharp intake of breath as my guild collectively ponders what that means. He's more than twice as powerful level-wise than Olivia. And we don't even know what powers he's absorbed. He could have a hell of a lot of tricks up his sleeve, and probably has a huge well of mana to draw on.

"How can we hope to get even close to that strong?" Emma asks the obvious question. I sigh. "I really don't know how we're going to beat him." I confess. "Well it's like you said Gemma. Together." Skylar says, speaking up for the first time in this conversation. All of us turn to her.

She sighs. "Look, I have something to say. And I don't know how you all are going to feel about hearing it." Skylar warns. There's a few moments of silence between us all. Olivia touches her arm gently in support. "Go on dear." Our mentor encourages her. Skylar smiles at her thankfully.