Go to Hokage Tower

You take in the sight of the office in a second. Tsunade, or as you refer to ‘Granny’ is sitting behind her desk, stacks of paper neatly arranged on it. Probably Shizune’s doing. While the blonde female Hokage is a chronic alcoholic and an obsessive gambler, a very bad one at that, there is no denying that she is the Hokage because she is more than qualified for it.

Standing behind her is Shizune, a jonin of Konohagakure and an apprentice of Tsunade. While quite talented in medical-nin, you can see that her true greatest talent is assisting Tsunade in doing her duties; that includes employing various techniques and tactics to the latter to do the job instead of drinking the time away. Maybe when you get around to being Hokage, Shizune could be trusted to be your assistant as well.

"Yo, granny!" you greet Tsunade with a lazy salute.

A very heavy paperweight hit your head.

"Don’t call me that, Naruto! And don’t start copying Hatake!" Tsunade growled.

As you rub your swollen forehead, you ask, "So, I am thinking just now,"

"Oh, you do that now? Must have hurt,"

You want to give a snarky reply that your head is hurting because of the paperweight but your self preservation skill is still working as intended. "I would like a mission?"

"Why are you saying it as if you’re not sure?" Tsunade asked back. "Also, you’re just home from that two weeks mission last week."

"Bored. Need to sate my ‘punching evil villains’ or ‘saving princess’ addiction."

"I really should put more funding into curing hyperactivity and stupidity," Tsunade sighed. "But I already expected as much. Shizune."

"Yes, Tsunade-sama." The brunette assistant quickly pick a few mission ledgers. She give a cursory look at each one of them "You’re in luck, Naruto. A princess mission, an evil villain mission and a peace-keeping mission"

You look at the folders.

The first one is an A-Rank Mission escorting one diplomat on a diplomatic tour around the neighbouring countries. Strange. The mission details is classified until it is accepted. Bodyguard mission, so 90% chance of the mission being… boring. After all, the mission only stated that only one chunnin is needed. Probably not a proper diplomat, from what you could garner. If the diplomat is an important person, he would probably employ a team of shinobis as a guard or if he is really a big shot, he would have your own team of guards and retinue.

The second one is another A-Rank mission, this time bandit control. Like before, the mission is also classified but the description stated that it is a composite team assignment. That meant a temporary team would be formed to handle the mission. But normally such missions would be assigned, not offered to him."

The third one is unexpectedly boring. C-Rank patrol mission.

"Okay, so what gives? The first one is to be a bodyguard to a diplomat, there’s nothing princessy about him."

Tsunade shrug, "Maybe the diplomat would be prissy and expects you to wait on him hand and foot all the time?

"The heck! How about the second one?"

This time, Shizune answers you, "Since we expected you to come in and demand a mission, we might as well prepare one that you will be assigned to anyway."

"The third one."

"Cheap," Tsunade said.

"Tsunade-sama!" Shizune cries out incredulously. "The mission pay out is for a full team. Are you going to swindle money out of your mission payouts again for your ?"

"Swindle my mission payouts?" You parrot, not believing your ears.

"Despite what Shizune claims, the cuts are fines for your misdemeanors."

"What? I stopped pranking people since forever!"

"You walked up the wall of the Hokage’s tower with muddy boots,"

"But Kakashi …"

"Is having his pay routinely docked as well, with higher fines since he’s Jonin."

"How come I’ve never seen these fines being recorded, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune asks suspiciously.

"So, brat, make your choice," Tsunade says while perfectly ignoring her assistant.