Go home and think about Britney Spears

Looking around the hallways, you're tired of school. What's the point? You wish yourself back to your room at home.

The room is a mess, with clothes and magazines randomly tossed everywhere. For a moment you consider wishing it clean, but instead you wish for your Mom to stop hassling you about it. You plop down on the bed and grab the remote for the tiny TV your parents let you keep in your room.

You change the crappy TV into a 72 inch plasma screen and flip through the channels. You land on one of those shows where 3rd rate comedians make fun of videos from several years ago.

Except this time it's a Britney Spears video. Your hand moves into your pants without you even thinking about it. "Man, I love Britney so much."

The comedians don't agree. "I hear she's getting married again. Ah, the sweet siren song of Vegas. Was there ever a white trash hillbilly who couldn't resist it?"

"Assholes," you say with a smile as you pull out your cock and start jerking. "I wish she'd never gotten married and was still a virgin."

"Yeah, sure, she's available technically," says another loser on the show. "But who'd want her washed up ass? Okay, I would, but that's a very low standard."

Your jerking becomes almost angry. "God, I hate these morons. I wish she was, right now, the biggest star ever and these guys were all kissing her ass."

The show changes. It turns into an interview show where all the comedians are gathered around Britney on couches. She looks so hot in a frilly brown shirt and tight jeans. Your huge TV screen shows off her gorgeous smile in perfect detail.

"Britney," says a comedian dripping with respect, "what are you even doing on this show? You're so far out of our league!"

"Well thanks, y'all! You know, no matter how many platinum albums I make, or how many billions of dollars my movies make, or my clothing line, or my cookbooks, I don't ever want to get a swelled head, y'know?"

Jerking feels so good as you take in her luscious body. You remember all the arguments you had with your friend Justin about her breast size and decide to settle it. You wish to know what her bra size actually is.

A piece of paper appears in front of you. "36B" you read aloud. "How can that be right?"

Another piece of paper appears. "She stuffs? Oh, no, they're as big as she's ever made them look."

Looking at the plasma TV, you see her chest fill out to match a poster on your wall.

"And she should show her body off more!"

Britney's outfit was already tight, but now the neckline plunges down to show off her incredible cleavage.

The comedians are having trouble concentrating now. The male ones are all sneaking peaks at her chest whenever she's not looking at them. That's unusual for a TV show, but you can hardly blame them with such a hot superstar.

"This is too much. I wish I was with Britney right now."

Suddenly you're standing next to a gigantic circular pool. You look around and see that the pool deck is connected to a house bigger than your high school. "Huh. This is where Britney is? I guess that show was pre-taped."

"How the hell did you get in here?!"

You turn around and see Britney and her big breasts wearing a tiny red bikini.