Final Boss Battle

Note: All characters ages are over 18. Especially dwarves. They’re just short, OK?

Allisa the elf ArchSage Wizard struggled to stand, supported by her magic staff. “Guys, we have to fight!” She called out to the rest of the party, “Nggdrasil is so much worse than the Demon Lord! The universe itself is at stake!”

“Sirene!” Allisa called out.

“I-I know…” Sirene, the Grandmonk Saintess replied and struggled mightily to her feet. “Goddess Ignata, grant me strength,” she muttered in prayer.

“Ooohhh, a servant of Ignata…” Nggdrasil said, looking amused. “That fiery little upstart is still running around, I see. Does she fancy herself a goddess now?”

Sirene muttered a long mantra. Before long, a pillar of rejuvenating light sprouted up from under her feet and spread across the floor to wash over her comrades.

Upon touching the wave of light, Jasabera gasped out loud with relief. It was as if a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders. The dwarven Grand Alchemist Warrior pushed herself off the floor and brandished her fiery two-handed battleaxe.

“A child of the earth…” Nggdrasil said with a giggle. “I hear my green children have been a pox on your kind for thousands of years. I had no idea myself that my cuties would be so effective underground.”

Rejuvenated by Sirene’s spell, Amaya the catgirl Master Rogue Assassin stirred awake and yawned. “Nyahh… Are we fighting again already?” She asked groggily as she instinctively drew her twin daggers.

Nggdrasil’s baleful gaze moved to Amaya. “My word!” The great entity exclaimed, “Olgana’s experiments lives on! For a mere mortal alchemist to create an entirely new hybrid species that would survive the ages… Truly extraordinary!”

Finally, Roland the Hero grabbed his sword and struggled to his feet. “Let’s do it guys! Light shall prevail!” He said.

Nggdrasil snickered. “Humans… altruistic, idealistic, optimistic, but eternally short-sighted. Do you need a moment to change your attire, little boy? You’re looking a little… wet.”

Roland ignored Nggdrasil’s comment and his own soaked crotch. He brandished his longsword and assumed a fighting stance.

To the party’s dismay however, the imposing goblin king, Zigzax stepped up before the party, brandishing his crude longsword.

“Ziggy! Snap out of it!” Roland yelled.

Zigzax cocked his head and glanced at Roland. “Sorry boss. Zigzax must protekt mommy.”

“No Ziggy!” Roland cried, “Remember our journey! Remember all that we’ve been through! Remember all our ups and downs. You’re one of us, Ziggy!”

“You can’t trust a greenkind, Roland,” Jasabera said bitterly, “This was bound to happen sooner or later.”

“No, I trust you Ziggy!” Roland shouted. “It’s not too late! I know there’s good in you! Look into your heart!”

“No, Zigzax only needs mommy,” the goblin replied.

“She’s not your mother. She’s your enslaver. You heard her! She doomed your entire race on purpose!” Roland shot back. “You don’t belong to her. Your place is here. We are your friends.”

Zigzax lowered his sword. “F-friend?” He asked.

Roland immediately lowered his sword as well. “Yes, Ziggy. I’m your friend.”

Zigzax looked down at his feet, looking deep in thought. Finally he muttered, “Zigzax always wanted to ask…”

“Yes, friend?” said Roland.

Zigzax looked up at Roland and asked, “What is friend?”

“H-huh?” Roland replied.

“Boss always say friend this, friend that. But Zigzax never understand. What is friend?”

“W-well you know… Friend. It means we are important to one another.”

Zigzax scratched his head. “But boss, everywhere you go, you call everybody friend.”

“Y-yeah… I’m a friendly guy.”

“But if everybody is boss’s friend, how is they important? Is Zigzax more important than your blacksmith friend in last town?”

“W-well, all my friends are important to me.”

Zigzax furrowed his brow. “So I am same important than all of boss’s friends who is almost everyone boss meets. That means Zigzax is same as everyone else in boss’s eyes? So what is so special about being boss’s friend?”

“Pffffffttttt…” Nggdrasil covered her mouth and snickered overhead.

“Wait, no… I mean…” Roland stammered.

“Good job distracting him, Roland!” Allisa suddenly yelled,

“Huh?” Roland glanced over and saw Allisa unleashing a massive spell. “No, Allisa, waittt!”

Allisa pointed her staff and released several enormous fiery spears at Nggdrasil.

“I’ll take care of Ziggy, so go for Nggdrasil!” Jasabera said and charged forth at the goblin king with her axe.

“Let’s go, nyaaah,” Amaya roared and dashed forth with her twin blades.

Zigzax cocked his blade all the way back behind his shoulder and then swung mightily, releasing an arched shockwave into the air that cleaved through Allisa’s fiery spears, effectively dissipating them. Then Zigzax intercepted Jasabera’s axe and exchanged several more blows with the dwarf girl.

“Damn it, he’s grown so much stronger,” Jasabera cussed as she got pushed back.

Amaya stealthily appeared behind Zigzax and tried to sink her blades into his back.

Zigzax quickly executed a spinning back-kick which sent Amaya skidding across the ground, effectively knocking the catgirl out.

Before Jasabera could recover, Zigzax rushed up to her and knocked her out with a punch to her abdomen.

“Damn it, Ziggy, stop it!” Roland exclaimed as he closed in from behind and swung his sword.

Zigzax parried Rolands blade and then took off running at breakneck speed towards Sirene before she could complete her recovery spell for her downed comrades.

Sirene was forced to cancel her spell and proceeded to engage Zigzax in close quarters combat. She even managed to land several dozen critical blows on the goblin. However, Zigzax just shrugged off her strikes like they were gnats.

Zigzax then managed to karate chop Sirene at the back of her neck, putting the saintess out of commission for the time being.

Roland charged Zigzax again, but the goblin easily parried the hero’s sword and kicked Roland in the balls.

As Roland rolled around in agony, the goblin casually jogged away to finish off Allisa.

Gritting his teeth, Roland struggled back to his feet, just in time to catch Zigzax pulling up after having put Allisa to sleep like the rest.

“H-how could you do this…” Roland said in dismay, “After all we’ve done for you.”

Zigzax scratched the back of his pointy green ears. “Zigzax thought about it. Zigzax is boss’s friend, which is no different than being any other person to boss. But Zigzax is mommy’s chosen. There is no other chosen. So that means Zigzax is mommy’s most important.”

The great Nggdrasil reached down from above and affectionately caressed the goblin’s head with her giant index finger once more. “Kyaaaaaaa! That’s right, my cutie patoootie! You’re mommy’s favorite now!”

Zigzax smiled with pride. “See?” He said. “Zigzax is mommy’s most important. So mommy is Zigzax’s most important.”

Nggdrasil snickered again from above. “You have a lot to learn about equality, hero of Jano. When everything is equal, everything is worthless. That goes for affection as much as friendship. Disparity drives all of existence. It’s the law of entropy.”

“You fiend…” Roland hissed and raised his sword, “Spare me your bullshit. I’ll stop you right now!”

Roland retracted his sword back and assumed a slashing stance. “Not even the Demon Lord could make me use my ultimate move!” He declared, “Behold the power of Jano, God of Good!”

Zigzax warily assumed a defensive posture. Meanwhile Nggdrasil leaned closer forwards from above, looking curious.

“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH….” Roland cried and gripped his sword tighter. He closed his eyes and furrowed his brow in deep concentration.

“It looks like Jano’s chosen is deadly serious this time round,” Nggdrasil said impishly, “Survive this blow, my darling pet, and mommy will be sorely impressed.”

Zigzax gulped. But he immediately dropped his sword and stood up straight, leaving himself defenseless.

“What are you doing?” Nggdrasil asked.

“Zigzax clamped his eyes shut. “Zigzax will survive this! Zigzax will impress mommy!” The goblin king cried.”

“Hmm? Oh dear… That’s not exactly what I had in mind…” Nggdrasil said.