Derp Chronicles 3

The cave was damp and dark, no light at all save for the pieces that shone through at the cave’s entrance. An entrance that was far away and seemed impossible to reach. It was the only way into and out of the cave, a steady stream of air came through the cave, its cool winds a nice refrain from the strangely hot cave. It’s walls were also moist, which caused concern, for no normal cave would be this hot or this moist unless something sinister was afoot. It was at this moment that the floor of the cave rose up and began to ungulate, removing any possible way to keep a foot on the ground. A ghostly voice echoed through the cave, the words seemingly saying “ah” for a few moments.

“ACHOO!” sneezed Mimi and her sneks, the sheer **** of the sneezes flipped Mimi onto her back, her feet flailing in the air.

“AW NO YOU RUINED IT!” cried out Yatina, whose face began to pout as she crossed her arms. Brenda couldn’t suppress her laugh any longer and let out a very motherly laugh as she helped Mimi to her feet and gave them both pats.

“It’s ok dear!” Brenda said reassuringly, “I’m sure we can pick up where we left off! Your story was just getting good!” Brenda told the young dragongirl, who smiled happily at the praise.

“Oh, oh! I gots a new idea!” Yatina nearly shouted, “Let’s see who’s mouth is bigger!” Yatina decided as she opened her mouth as wide as she could. Mimi, not one to take such a challenge lightly, flung open her mouth, pushing herself to new limits as she attempted to not only tie her best friend, but get her mouth even wider. Ssssssam, Bob, and Ssssssshantel, not wanting to be left out, all opened their mouths as wide as they could too. They, being sneks, also unhinged their jaws to open their mouths even wide.

“Aye ‘orgot we ‘ould oo ‘at!” Mimi said as she kept her mouth wide open. She closed her eyes and focused her jaw muscles to detach her jaw and opened her mouth even wider than Yatina. “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! AYE ‘IN!” the derpy Gorgon said as she jumped up and down, victorious.

“NO FAIR! NO FAIR NOOOOOOOOOO FAAAAAAAAAAAAIR!” cried Yatina as she threw a temper tantrum over Mimi’s superior mouth widening skills.

“Now, now, Yatina!” Brenda said in a stern voice as she waggled her finger at the tantruming young dragoness. “That’s not how a good little girl acts, is it?” Brenda asked. Yatina slowly stopped her tantrum and looked at the older woman.

“N-no Mama Brenda,” she said as she wiped away the tears with her sleeve. “Good girls don’t throw tantrums...”

“Very good!” She said with a warming smile on her face. “All Mimi did was use her body’s natural abilities, that’s not unfair is it?” she asked.

“But but, it let’s her open wider than me!” countered the young dragongirl.

“Ok, we can make it so she can’t do that but then that means you can’t fly or transform when we play Derp the Snek,” Brenda said, knowing full well that Yatina would never give up her advantages in Derp the Snek.

“Noooooooooooooo! That’s how I’ve kept my winning streak!” Yatina cried out, rather proud of her ability to best the creator of her own game.

“Oh, oh, yeah! Let’s do that! I won’t do the mouth thingy and she can’t do the flying!” Mimi said happy that she could finally have a chance at winning again.

“No! I just said you can do the mouth thingy!” deflected Yatina.

“No, no! I don’t wanna do that anymore!” Mimi told her.

“But I wanna ffffffffffflllllllllllllllllllllllllly!” Yatina said as she ran around Mimi and Brenda flapping her arms.

“Me too!” Mimi said as she copied her friend, the two running around Brenda. The older woman couldn’t help but laugh at the two young girls’ silly antics.

“Oh come here, you two!” she said as she opened her arms. The two girls immediately beelined for Brenda and happily shared a hug with her. She kissed both of them on their foreheads followed by a few pats.

“Yay! Pats!” the two said in unison.

“Momma Brenda,” started Yatina.

“Yes, dear?” asked Brenda.

“When is Big Bro John gonna be back?” asked Mimi.

“We’re getting bored in here!” said Yatina. A tinge of worry ran through Brenda as she struggled to find the best way to calm the two girls and not have them asking to go outside. Brenda knew that the battle had already started. The ceiling shaking multiple times had all but confirmed it. Her mind could only guess at what could shake an entire castle down to its very foundations, but she knew it was no place for these two.

“Well, you see dears, John has to deal with really bad people right now,” Brenda started.

“How bad?”

“Like eat dessert before dinner bad?”

“Or eat all the cookies and tell nobody bad?”

“Or eat all the-”

“Ah! Let me explain!” Brenda said, knowing full well the two could go on for hours using nothing but food based examples. The two derps instantly stopped and waited for Brenda to continue. “You see, these bad people want to make it so that John, his friends, and even you two not have any more play time!” Brenda told the two in terms that they could best understand.

“Why would someone do that?!”

“Was John a bad boy?!”

“No that can’t be it, John’s always been good! Right?”

“Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh. I think so! He always takes care of us right?”

“Oh yeah! Like that time we accidentally went to the other same place!”

“Oh yeah! He and Idena saved us!”

“And we got to meet ourselves!”

“That was fun!”

“Super fun!”

“Ultra fun!”

“Mega-”

“Girls! Focus!” Brenda said, snapping the two out of their loop again. The two stopped and looked at the older woman with a hint of sorrow for interrupting her yet again.

“Sorry, Mama Brenda,” the two said in unison as they lowered their heads. Brenda grabbed the two and pulled them close.

“It’s ok sweeties. I know you don’t mean bad. It’s just...this is very important,” she said to the two derps as she looked them in the eyes. “John is trying his best to make sure we can continue to be the way we are and don’t have to have anybody interfere with our way of life. But these people aren’t nice, so to keep us safe, John has us staying down here until the negotiations are over. Understand?” Brenda asked the two. The two stared blankly at her for a few seconds before they nodded their heads.

“John will tell those meanies to go away!” Mimi said with a smile on her face.

“Yeah! And if they don’t, he’ll beat them up!” added Yatina.

“John’s the best!” Mimi happily declared.

“Yeah! But wait...” Yatina looks around. “Where’s Momma Gali or Big Sis Miho?” she asked as she continued to look around for them.

“Oh, those two are with John,” Brend told them.

“Really?!” they asked together.

“Yep! And I’m gonna tell you two a secret!” she said as she leaned in close. The two derps’ eyes lit up upon hearing that they get to hear a secret. The two scooted up closer to Brenda to hear what she had to say. “Behind every strong man, is an even stronger woman. Or in John’s case, all his friends like Idena, Gali, Miho, and the others!” Brenda said smiling.

“OH! CAN WE BE STRONG WOMEN TOO?!” the two basically yelled. Brenda burst out laughing at their outburst.

“Of course you can!” Brenda remarked as she patted the two girls. “But you have to make sure to eat all your vegetables so you can grow up strong!” Her motherly instincts kicking in.

“Bleh!”

“Urgh!”

“They don’t taste good!”

“They’re yucky!”

“Ok, fine. Don’t eat them. But I guess you won’t grow up to be big, strong woman that can help John,” Brenda said as she moved her head away.

"NO! NO! WE WANNA HELP BIG BRO JOHN FIGHT THE BAD GUYS!" the two yelled as they puffed out their chests and faces, attempting to look tough. Brenda gave out a chuckle as she gave each girl a treat and more pats.