Date 2: Interlude

Joan examined herself in the full-length mirror. Samuel had rarely used one since puberty, but Joan had a body she liked. It wasn't what she would have designed, but there was an advantage to having no control. If Joan could pick, she would feel the anxiety of making a choice and regret it later. Alan had given a quick, simple explanation for what to make and why.

Samuel's dorm had been raided for personal effects, while Natalia had a collection of items from several former homes, mostly ones she had lost or forgotten about. The full-length mirror seemed to be Ariadne's addition, not something either of them had owned. Joan imagined there was a fetish element to letting the Audience watch her investigations, but the same could be said for crying about it, so Joan tried not to worry about it.

The shawl that Natalia had offered was practical. The sensations continued to be hard to manage, and the shawl preserved enough modesty for Joan to function without discomfort. Joan also felt a little thrill for the skirt she had borrowed. The gender norms combined with the narrow tailoring range for women's pants had made the skirt more practical, and it was nice to have the option.

Pockets would be a problem. A good problem to have, relatively speaking. Fortunately, Ariadne's body had a number of pouches along the neck. The avatar continued to be fascinating. Her vision was sharp, her sense of smell strong, and echolocation was fun to use.

"Ready?" Natalia looked amused. Breakfast had been a screaming match between Laurel and Chloe, but Laurel had told them she'd be in "the library" and Team Too Old For This Shit had figured out the locations that qualified. Chloe had not taken the explanation of Sky's ingredient choices well, though Joan thought it was a bit of a relief. Samuel had always wanted to be a vegan, but never had the balls for it. Sky feeding them long pig was weird, but not as bad as torturing animals.

"Yes, ready." Joan nodded, and the two women left the room, Crawler at their heels.

The "library" was an odd structure. A wall of terminals and desk chairs had room for the cast and a few others to all work at once. A bookshelf on the other wall was mostly comics, picture books, and RPG manuals of various types. Joan recognized a section of that wall as clearly books from Samuel's childhood, but new printings. The third wall contained an open bar, or perhaps potion storage. Whatever the small glass vials of clear liquids were for, it wasn't obvious.

Laurel sat in one of the desk chairs, the terminal in front of her open to images of the planet Saturn. Scratch paper and a pencil were in front of Laurel, with numbers and words that showed no sign of order. A black and white book titled GURPS Ultra-Tech provided the only other clue to Laurel's project.

"Hello, Laurel." Natalia took the lead. "We have some questions for you."

"Great." Laurel spun the chair. "I was hoping we'd have some proactive contestants. What do you girls want to know?"

"Mostly, we wanted to compare Ariadne's explanation of events to your memories. Would that be okay?" Natalia smiled.

"You know she could've changed my memories, right?" Laurel shrugged. "So far, she's been on the level. I can't confirm she's the real Ariadne, the one I used to know. She was just a kid, not a host, before."

"Who was the host?" Natalia asked.

Laurel paused. "We had a change in the second week. Larry, Ariadne's Dad, was on set after that. He's a Crawler, like Ariadne. He might work for the magical world's CIA, as he was called 'Agent Black,' but he called Ariadne an 'agent,' so it might be a joke."

"Alright." Natalia nodded. "What do you know about the people who **** us?"

"Well, most of them aren't Crawlers." Laurel looked back at her notes. "The family tree includes former contestants, necromancers, shoggoths, and what might be a literal rat leading up to Ariadne. Her aunt's a kickass lesbian vampire, and her childhood hero is an alien obsessed with _The Matrix _who married a Canadian who will be elected President of the United States in the future. I never figured out if that kind of variety is 'typical' for the Audience or if her family's weird for them."

Natalia blinked and turned to Joan. "Did you have questions?"

"Yeah." Joan tried to stay on topic. "What happens when we get home? These bodies are great, but I can't explain what happened, right?"

"Oh, the season with the alien talked about that. We might get purchases to 'normalize' our transformations. You should be fine." Laurel smiled at Joan.

"Oh, that's good." Joan nodded. "What about the snake?"

"You probably should shift to another girl, soon." Laurel looked at the copy of Ariadne. "The Audience didn't vote to make you a Crawler, and voted for Ariadne to be a human.

"Oh." Joan paused. The 'Crawler' body felt great, but the Audience already didn't like her.

Laurel gave Natalia a questioning look. "Can you share the clothes you get from your transformation, after you change to another instance with your interface?"

"Oh, yes." Natalia nodded. "We've already done that."

"Oh, excellent. Have either of you tried the same principle with hair?"

"Hair?" Natalia touched her ear.

"Right. Your hair length changes when you pick a movie. Human hair's pretty valuable, actually. I was just looking that up. If we could produce hair for wigs, that would be great. It's an ethical industry, as it's for cancer patients. I don't think it adds to global warming unless they burn the hair, either." Laurel took out a pair of scissors.

"Wait," Joan spoke up. "What about blood? Liver, kidneys?"

"Oh." Natalia looked worried.

Laurel laughed. "That sounds like a terrible idea, unless you want to 'come out' as a witch. Area 51 might be comfortable. Hair seems easier to launder."

"Yeah." Natalia nodded. "Also wouldn't donating kidneys and livers hurt?"

"Probably not. Just knock yourself out, trigger it as you wake up, or have someone trigger the change. I'm sure there are masochism TFs, too." Laurel grinned. "You can even try to get a masochism TF deliberately with your bonus points."

"Really?" Joan brightened at the idea. "That sounds useful in general. Like, if I enjoy pain, it should open up a lot of jobs. Not all masochists are like that, but some people really do process pain differently. If I liked sore muscles, or didn't care about them, that's a lot of jobs I would enjoy that are high demand."

"Good thinking." Laurel nodded. "I hear living ships are all masochists, but I don't know the details. There isn't a lot of Stargazer text here, compared to last time."

Laurel exhaled. “Yeah. Sorry—that’s where we are.”

“If you weren’t dealing with existential dread, you wouldn’t be on Harem Hotel.”