Challenge 2, Part 2: Some Head Home

Dinah

Dinah finds herself stepping into her office. It is rather spartan, all things considered. Old textbooks and her diplomas line the walls. A singular adjustable standing desk with an office chair pushed to the side. A springy mat for standing on. A couple of fake plants to add a little fake life to the room. Her colleagues’ offices usually have pictures of family, friends. Dinah’s does not. The de-aged doctor sighs.

What am I supposed to do with this thing? She asks herself, feeling the weight of the magic rifle on her shoulder. And what possible ‘loose ends’ do I need to tie up? She stands at her desk and boots up her computer, finding and flicking through her real cell phone. No family notes for the foreseeable future. Not that my family wants much to do with me most of the time. Appointments are booked pretty solid. Two deliveries scheduled for next week. Do I spend this time trying to find all of my patients a new OB/GYN? That’s probably the right thing to do, but not exactly going to win me any favors with the audience. Either way, I should be heading home. Don’t want to arouse any suspicions.

Dinah grabs her purse and slumps her way out of the hospital. No one bothers her. Good thing I have my reputation for being absolutely miserable to be around post-delivery, eh? She gets in her car and drives away, wondering what exactly she should do with the ridiculous challenge before her, the rifle covered by a blanket she keeps in her trunk for emergencies. This is the weirdest emergency she’s ever dealt with.

Scarlet

Scarlet finds herself shoved into a hallway in her department’s building. She instantly turns back around and walks back into the bathroom. She quickly holsters the rifle into her inventory and takes a moment to breathe. Regaining her composure, the redhead walks to the TA cubicle area and grabs her purse. Then she heads out of one of the side doors to the campus green.

As she walks outside she overhears a conversation. It catches her attention for the sheer oddity of it. Assistant Dean Wormwood is hurriedly following an army officer with a strange Grim Reaper insignia on his shoulder, openly wielding a shotgun.

“Sir, I am the commandant of the college’s militia unit. Please tell me what you intend to do here?”

“Classified. I will inform the college if I need further assistance. Please stop following me.”

“It’s part of my duties to ensure the safety of all on campus and...”

The officer turns around, “I don’t give a flying shit about you militia pansies. You will follow directions like a good civilian and get the fuck out of my way.”

“Do they teach you civility? Give me the name of your commanding officer.”

Then Wormwood takes the butt of a shotgun to his face. The strange officer walks into the front door of the psychology department building. Scarlet sees the old man struggle to stand up, bleeding profusely from a gash on his forehead.

I shouldn’t use my ki, but I should help him. Walking to the man and offering her hand, she asks, “Hey, you okay, sir?”

“I’m not, my dear. Could you please take me to the campus infirmary? I need a check-up, an ice pack, and a phone.”

“Sure. Right this way.”

Daphne

Daphne is enjoying swimming through the staff water tubes once again. It feels good to be back in the water instead of using her weird human legs to move around. She doesn’t understand quite how her harem-sisters stand it. She heads to her old cave in the staff area. When she gets there, she sees all of her stuff that didn’t make it to the dorm room destroyed. Her books. Her childhood dolls. Everything that gave her joy as a fingerling. She crawls into the middle of the pile and starts to weep.

Why, Daphne bemoans, why is everyone in the frenzy so vindictive, so mean? I didn’t do anything to hurt them. Why treat me this way? Daphne wonders, not for the first time, why she is so different. Sure, she hungers for testicles like the rest of them, but she never felt the need to treat those who wronged her cruelly (when the old Betta brain isn’t acting up, at least). The thing she always wanted was for someone, anyone, to hold her like in the children’s books she used to learn how to read; her Beloved does it admirably. Now, she wants more. More than just the love of her Beloved, more than the love from her harem-sisters. She wants her old family, her frenzy, to love her as one of their own, too. Is this greedy? Yes. Mermaids are known to be greedy.

So, how can I change them to make them less cruel?

Scarlet

Well, even if I was going to go strip tonight, there’s no point going now. Scarlet sits in the militia barracks infirmary, listening to Wormwood complain over the phone. Even with getting half of the conversation, Scarlet figures out that the shotgun wielding commando was there for her. She should get away soon. Helpfully, the Assistant Dean hangs up the phone and turns to address her.

“Well, thank you, young lady. If there is anything I can do to repay you...”

“Actually, there is. One of my friends said that Professor McDougal in the psychology department is harassing her. Since he’s on the Tenure Committee, she’s afraid of reporting him. Can you perhaps do an informal investigation?”

“You’re not the first to report him. It will be done.”

“Thank you, sir. If you don’t mind, I’m late for work so...”

“Fine, fine. Thank you, young lady.”

Scarlet heads out the door. She knows what to do with the gun. She just hopes she can get there in time.

Dinah

Dinah parks her car in her assigned covered parking spot at her condo, still unsure what to do with her rifle shot. She shoulders it, then heads to unlock her door. She hears the mewing of her cat. Oh, Mittens! How I missed you!

Dinah scoops up the cat, who is clearly annoyed by it, and starts to smoosh her face into the soft kitty tummy. Mittens, for her part, bops Dinah in the face. Dinah, satisfied for now, sets the cat down and tosses a subscription TV dinner into the microwave (it is about time for lunch back on the show). Again, her home is spartan. The only additions to the basic “comes with the condo” furniture she has are all either of or for Mittens. Her few personal photos are of Mittens. Mittens has an auto-feeder for both kibble and water. A fancy cat tree with a built in scratching post. She is definitely a crazy cat lady in the making; just has to wait the next 15 to 20 years before she can retire and then have nothing in her life other than her cats. The conclusion makes her start to sob for a completely different reason than the one she would usually have after a delivery.

Daphne

Daphne is in the Hotel library, having snuck her way past the contestant detectors using the staff water tubes. She is digging into various dimensions’ information on mermaids to try and come up with a solution to her problem. Her frustrations are rising in a fashion that chewing on her Squeaky Squid Sid just doesn’t relieve. She wishes Scarlet or Harper were here. Daphne dabbles in a lot of things, but the behavior of sentient creatures was not an expertise. Wait a second! Harper is in the hotel and she has a phone!

Daphne pulls out her phone to text her Beloved: “Hey, Beloved. What makes sentient creatures nicer?”

Harper texts back: “Are you trying to use me to cheat the challenge?”

Daphne replies: “It’s what wizards do best. Wanna help me cheat?”

Daphne twiddles her thumbs and gnaws on her chew toy waiting for a reply. She gets it eventually. It’s long: “So, Scarlet would be able to give you a better answer than me, but, from behavioral biology, parental investment in children usually goes hand-in-hand with ‘niceness’. R-selection species like spiders tend to be meaner than K-selection species like elephants, all other things being equal.”

Daphne texts to confirm: “So, caring for children makes people generally nicer?”

Harper sends back a thumbs-up emoji. Then a peach emoji. Then a tongue one? Ooooh. Harper is horny. Guess she’s really getting into us challenging the challenge. Now that I know what I’m looking for, I’ll figure it out!

Scarlet

“Pumpkin, is that you? Aren’t you supposed to be studying for your orals?”

“Dad, you can’t be saying that I’m not allowed to visit my parents just ‘cause, are you?”

“Sure you can, pumpkin. It’s just... sigh... come in.”

Scarlet enters her parents’ apartment. It is a lot less nice than the one she grew up in. Ever since her mom got cancer and her dad lost his job trying to take care of her, finances have been tight. Too tight. She does what she does every time she visits: heads to the kitchen to cook some dinner for them. Her dad is a terrible cook and her mom rarely has the energy. She specifically makes the pizza adjacent meal that Harper cooked her on their first date to avoid triggering her transformation as much as possible. As she works, she asks her dad, “Good day or bad?”

“Bad. Your Mom’s not taking too well to her new meds. You? Good few weeks or bad?”

The question shocks Scarlet. Then she realizes that, in her effort to get her thesis ready for review, she was all but ignoring her parents for a couple of weeks before she was kidnapped on the show. She replies, “All in all, good few weeks? Got my thesis written. My faculty advisor is being an ass, but I’ll be free of him soon. Made some new friends.”

“Smoochie friends or just hanging out friends?”

Ugh. Dad knows just how to wound me. “What makes you think I made a smoochie friend?”

“I said smoochie friends, not friend. Your smile makes it up to your eyes. That hasn’t happened since Alex and Heidi. You got some pics of them yet? Your Mom would probably like some.”

How do I even explain this? “Sorry, no pics yet.”

“Ok, on a scale of Heidi to Alex, how hot are they? If my daughter is gonna be eating clams for all her days, she better be eating the best.”

Scarlet rolls her eyes as blatantly as she possibly can. Her dad chuckles.

“Don’t be mean. Just because Heidi was a little plain, doesn’t mean she didn’t have other admirable qualities.”

“She dumped you at Alex’s funeral. Fuck her.”

Fair enough, Dad. “Well, all 3 are towards the Alex end, in their way. One’s like a blonde Mom from back in the day. One’s a slightly taller, slightly bulkier version of that Ms. Katzenbaum I caught you perving on once. Third is a bit of a work-in-progress; she’s adjusting to some new circumstances, trying to find herself. But she’s about as tall as you are and can really dance. I also made some not quite to smoochie level friends, but I’m sure they get to smoochie level soon enough.”

“My pumpkin, such a pussy slayer!”

“Daaaaaad!” He just loves to tease me. So embarrassing.

Before he can continue, his phone fires off an alert. “Need to check on Mom, kiddo. Maybe she’ll feel strong enough to sit at the table for dinner for your sake.”

Dinah

Dinah has the rifle out. Am I really going to do this? It’s insane.

Mittens looks at her dumb-founded. Dinah points the gun at her cat and mentally selects her at the target. Then, she fires. Direct hit, as promised.

Suddenly, her cat is not just a cat anymore. Another Dinah, naked as the day she was born, is lounging on the couch. “Mama?” it asks.

“It’s okay, Mittens, it’s okay. Mama gave you some special powers. Mama is going away for a while and she needs you to be able to take care of things for me, okay?”

“What Mama need me to do?”

“Okay, so when you are here, you can go from looking like me to being a cat and back. When you leave, you’ll be me: my thoughts, my personality, my knowledge. I need you to be me while I’m gone. Take care of my patients, keep you in food and lodgings.”

“Oooh, can I eat people food if I want?”

“Yes.”

“Can I get some boys to play with?”

“I mean, you’re fixed, so sure, I guess...”

“Yeeaaaaaah! Thank you, Mama! Mittens make you proud!”

I just made a monster didn’t I? With that thought, Dinah is gone.

Scarlet

Scarlet finishes making dinner for her folks. They still haven’t come out of the bedroom. Scarlet knows what she has to do. She’s just worried about the fallout. So, she was told some help was just a song away but she doesn’t feel like singing. She just prays.

<Eilistraee, I want to bargain.>

There is a strange delay, like she’s trying to speak out from space or something. Eventually, she hears in her mind, “<Dear... sweet Scarlet..., our connection... is weak. How... far away... are you... from Skye?>”

“<She’s on the other side of the continent. Far.>”

The pause is palpable. “<Be... quick then..., dear.>”

“<If I use the gun as I intend to, will the army be after my parents like they were after me this afternoon?>”

Another long pause. Too long. “<Given... how they... are pursuing... Tina... right now..., likely... yes.>”

What did she get into now that got the army on her cute little tail? “<If I join one of your orders, will you keep them safe?>”

“<If you... join..., I will... keep... them safe... after... you do... your part.>”

“<Close enough. Agreed.>”