Better buns

“S-see Rachel, I h-have a much nicer ass than that Sally-no-tush!” Giggled a drunken Jenny.

“You’re right. It s-should’ve been called Jenny’s b-big ass bur- bur- burgers!”

The two friends had gotten drunk this Friday night, something Jenny typically doesn’t like to do. But since she’s been laid off earlier today due to budget cuts, she just had to unwind a bit.

Even though it could no longer be considered ‘a bit’ anymore.

“Damnit, what are those hooligans doing at my sign?” A heavyset man in his fifties looked outside his window. “Come, kid. Let’s chase them away.”

“Right away, mr. Sanders.” Answered his waiter, a guy in his mid twenties.

“Get away from my sign, you harlots!”

“Oh, crap! Run Jenny!” Rachel was already sprinting away before Jenny even realized what was going on. Seeing the two man, she jumped down from the sign…

…only to get stuck in the mud.

She bent over and tried to untie her shoelaces, but it was too dark and she was too drunk.

As the two man came closer and got a great look at her ass, she cried. “Please, don’t call the police. I have just been fired today and I really could not use this right now.”

The older man sighed. “I don’t know, miss, I-“

The guy spoke up. “Wait! Boss, look at her ass!”

“Dammit kid, now’s not the time to think with your other head!”

“That’s not what I meant!” Yelled the guy defensively. “What I meant was that her ass would be perfect for that job you’ve been talking about.”

“You mean the one I couldn’t find a girl for, because it was ‘too embarrassing’?”

“That one! Maybe this girl is interested?”