Asian Persuasion, by daciadesire and lamancha

Someones got a bad case of The Yellow Fever

---

“Oh, this is one of those stories.”

“Those stories, Gina?”

“You know, cringy as fuck!”

“That doesn't exactly narrow it down.”

“You know what I mean!”

“I suppose...we haven't really had to deal with raceplay before.”

“Yeah, its pretty gross. I don't want racism in my porn!”

“Finally this is a place where I can air out my hot takes on orientals.”

“Please don't.”

“Look, I'm not a racist, but...”

“OK! So, this is all about fucking asians, huh? Should we bring Marel along for the ride?”

“I feel that would be even more cultural insensitive then this already going to be.”

“Oh, this is gonna suck.”

“But before we start this no doubt delightful tale of cultural appropriation, I have something to clarify.”

“Great.”

“The story that we are tasked with reading, Piya, the Tall Thai girl is written by two authors, daciadesire and lamancha.“

“Ok, been a while since we had one of these. Last one was...Adventurer's Peril?”

“Hurk!”

“Marcie?”

“I'm still experiencing PTSD from that one.”

“Just try to not faint this time around, alright?”

READING IN PROGRESS (BGM)

“Hm! That sure was something!”

“You don't know what to say, do you Gina?”

“Piss off! This was just a story about a guy having sex with women! The fuck am I supposed to say about it?”

“Yes and surprisingly enough it was even consensual. I...actually don't think we had a consensual non fetish sex story before.”

“I mean, depends if you count the whole race thing as a fetish.”

“Eh, I don't think it was racist enough for that, but we should take it from the top. We are the protagonist without a name.”

“Is this also a first? Pretty sure these fucks always had names, even if we don't always remember them.”

“Yes, you sometimes get to customize their names but opting to completely omit it is a rather bold move.”

“Who cares! Protag-kun has the personality of a canadian toaster.”

“...ehem, “Protag-kun” as it is, happens to work as a bouncer in a nightclub. As you might have surmised by now he likes asian girls and this is the story of him having sex with said asian girls.”

“Specifically in this case Piya, the tall thai girl.”

“While Piya has a boyfriend, he kind of sucks, so she decides to screw around.”

“Protag-kun is of course all on board with that.”

“Curiously enough, I wouldn't describe him as a douchebag. He just wants to have sex without commitment. Which is why he gets it on with two girls at once. The titular Piya and Yui.”

“And that means sex, loooots of sex...haaa.”

“Gina?”

“I mean, when you first me to read stuff here, I was definitely expecting all stories to be like this. Just sex scene after sex scene.”

“Well...”

“But surprisingly enough, a story like this is more the exception then the norm. Thankfully.”

“So I take it you are not a fan?”

“How do I say this as gently as possible? This shit is fucking boring!”

“Eh, we had worse.”

“Yes, but at least I could make fun of them. This isn't even bad enough for that!”

“It is certainly not badly written. In a sense this is the quintessential CHYOA story. If you are into asian women and are on this site to get your willie wet(which you obviously are) this is for you.”

“I'm just soo not interested in Protag-kuns boring life! At first there was at least this jealous ex-boyfriend to look forward for some drama, but 50 chapters in and everyone is just happy fucking each other!”

“There is indeed very little drama. The two main girls don't really have an issue with Protag-kun basically two-timing them.”

“You would think that's interesting but it isn't. When the only potential conflict is that Yui's parents might find out that she is fucking a non asian you know you have fucking plot issues.”

“I suppose this is unavoidable when a story has two authors. It is hard to have a consistent plot that way.”

“You know what's far more interesting? The two authors relationship. You think they fuck each other?”

“Gina!”

“No, hear me out. They always comment how sexy they find each others chapters. They are clearly writing to get each other off at this point. That's kinda hot.”

“Gina, what did I tell you about lusting over the authors?”

“No seriously we only read 50 chapters, but this shit is 300 chapters long! These two are jerking each other off via literature for a long time!”

“Gina, please.”

“Just think Marcie! A story about two authors co-writing fiction for each others pleasure! This shit is way more interesting! Someone write this!”

“Ok, Gina, I hate to do this but according to his profile lamancha is a guy.”

“Oh, well there goes any interest I had. Fuck you, lamancha!”

“Good. Now, if you allow me to steer this review back into a more normal direction, what do you think of the writing itself?”

“Eh, it was ok. lamancha is clearly the more talented of the two.”

“Hm, I suppose I have to agree. On the other hand we only get lines such as..."

I’m in the hospital for a couple of hours with Stephen diagnosed with a priapism. I’m pretty sure I’ve had a couple of ‘Piyapisms’ in my life.

---

"...from dacia."

“Ugghhh!!!!"

“Oh, come on! That one was genius!”

“At the very least her chapters are short.”

“Which one of the two main girls do you prefer?”

“Seriously, Marcie? Is there even a difference between Piya and Yui? Because I sure as hell can't tell.”

“Hmm, any favorite scene?”

“No, duh. The only remotely sexy thing are the two lesbians and they aren't even asian.”

“Oh dear, this is like pulling teeth.”

“That would be more fun then reading through this slog.”

“I suppose the masturbation question is a no go as well.”

“Obviously. We done?”

“Yes, I'm just pondering how to properly close this review.”

“Go ahead.”

“...”

“...”

“Now about these hot takes...”

“WE DONE.”