Aqua City One, by The Other Guy

“Aqua City One, by The Other Guy...is this some Waterworld shit?”

“I can see why you would think so, Gina. But based on the first chapter, this appears to be more Utopian.”

“Hm, ok...so this water city became independent, and then four families rose to power and have ruled over it ever since.”

“Yes, I am of course in favor of enlightened dictatorship, but these type of Oligarchs rarely produce anything of note.”

“Ok.”

“Seriously, Gina. Is there a more wretched form of government then hereditary monarchy? These witless fools think that there mere birth elevates them above the rest of society. It is laughable! Delusion in its finest form.”

“Marcie, for fucks sake can you not?”

“I suppose we should give this “state” a chance. I am sick of unkown7's laughable idea of statecraft. Let us see what nonsense this author comes up with.”

READING IN PROGRESS (BGM)

“And we are done! And Marcie? You satisfied? Statecrafty enough for you?”

“Meh.”

“Yeah well, what where you expecting?”

“Some political intrigue would have been a start.”

“I don't think the story has any interest in that.”

“Sigh, just get on with it. I'm sure my enthusiasm will come back eventually.”

“Alright, we follow Lucis Lux, son of the mighty house Lux and before we go any further I have to say something very important.”

“Sure, go for it.”

“Lucis Lux is a retarded name, holy shit.”

“While that is a reasonable criticism, I do think we should aim higher then complain how dumb the main protagonist's name sounds. Even if it is especially stupid this time around.”

“We COULD change the name but...”

“This isn't a complain exclusive to Aqua City One, but to all authors who make heavy use of the customize feature. You do realize this resets every time you restart your PC, right?”

“Who the fuck wants to put in stupid shit like “The core colour of house Lux“ every time they start reading?”

“Quite, so we just stuck with Lucis Lux.”

“Which is still a stupid name.”

“Gina...”

“Fine. The Lux family is hot shit, but because they have some weird rotation system in place, every house rules for exactly hundred years, before another takes over.”

“And the story starts when the rule of Lux has just ended and House Felstat takes the reigns...haaaah...”

“...”

“I said....haaaah...”

“Oh geez, Marcie! What's wrong? Please tell me for I much desire to learn what grieves you!”

“It's frustrating you know. The setting is interesting enough, there is a decent amount of world building. You have a good setup for conflict, both with the four families and house internal infighting. Furthermore, the story starts within a transition period, which is a hotbed for interesting developments.”

“Ok.”

“And yet, despite having all the ingredients, the author just...does not cook them. Lucis apparently wants to do something, he feels that his position is threatened, but the situation is clearly not dire enough because Lucis spends almost all his time fucking whatever comes in front of him.”

“Ok...”

“I mean. Let us compare this one with “A sissy in the 22nd century.” On the surface they are very similar. Sci-fi set in the future in a society with an absurd focus on sex. In sissy it is a dystopian world seen from someone on the bottom. Meanwhile here it is utopian, viewed from someone at the very top.”

“Ok...zzz....”

“But in “Sissy” the author still manages to keep up the tension. We want to follow Jesse because we want to see where this journey takes him. I don't feel Lucis is on any kind of journey, he is just living life and that is boring.”

“...”

“Gina? Are you sleeping?”

“Woah! N-No! I'm complete awake! Story sucks! Totally agree with...whatever you said.”

“Perhaps, I'm being overly critical here. I never wanted to bludgeon my brain in and while the grammar and syntax could use a bit....a LOT of touch up it was...serviceable.”

“Heh, at least when the author didn't have a stroke.”

---

“You’re tempted the reactive the projector to get the cooldown cooing but now that you’re clean you decide against it.”

_

“On the not brain damaged side, there are some lines in here, that I found genuinely funny.”

---

“I was promised and you two aren’t getting any dessert until that promise is kept.”

---

“Uh...are we going to talk about the actual plot eventually or...?”

“What plot is there, beyond Lucis waking up, having lots of sex and going back to sleep?”

“Yeah, fair point. Also there where five dickgirls in this. That's a new record and I fucking hate it.”

“I am pretty sure there where more in Lois Lane.”

“Yeah, but these five had actual names and personality and shit. Like, we where supposed to care for them. Ugh...disgusting.”

“As for the sex scenes itself, they where decent and varied enough. Although I think the dick sucking was getting a bit stale, both figuratively and literally speaking.”

“This is one of those stories where everyone just fucking loves the MC. It's hilarious that he feels his position is in danger at all, given how much his dick compels everyone.”

“There is one character, who seems antagonistic to Lucis, but the one scene we have with her makes her come across as a complete joke.”

“I was kinda hoping we get to see more of whatsherface, just to get a bit spice put back in the story.”

“Yes, the spice doesn't flow.”

“So, the verdict on this one is...”

“Undecided. The story now sits at 55 Chapters. That is a lot, but it is not too late for the author to introduce a conflict to keep the reader hooked. Again, the set up is all in place. The author just needs to stop twiddling his thumbs.”

“Hate to break it to you, Marcie. But last update was from March. And the one before that was September. Seems like twiddling thumbs is all this author is good for.”

“Lovely, this might actually be the biggest amount of wasted potential we encountered so far.”

“But, at the very least there is potential here to be wasted, which is more then we can say for most of the shit we read!”

“I believe this is a good positive note to end things, Gina. Good night everyone.”