An "anonimous" e-mail to the principal

You decide to write an e-mail to the principal describing what she should be avoided in order to better accommodate the needs of male straight students

The e-mail is anonymous so that it can't be officially traced back to you should this go south, but you leave enough clues so that it's obvious who's behind it, so that she knows who to direct her "****" at

You begin the e-mail denouncing her and making an obviously fake threat of legal action should things not change. The goal of this is to piss her off and make sure she falls for it. Then you list your demands:

1 A strict dress code

"It can be very disturbing for straight boys to be regularly exposed to the female figure. So students should be demanded (or at least heavily incentivized) to always wear underwear and clothes of appropriate sizes. 'Flashy', 'clingy' and 'see-through' clothing should similarly be avoided"

2 Privacy

"It is essential for young boys to have privacy, especially from women. As such, they should not be required to share dormitories, rooms, bathrooms, showers, or beds. This is especially true for sexual activities, such as masturbation"

3 Bodly autonimy

"This practically goes without saying, but straight boys should always have the right to refuse any of the following:

Blowjobs

Creampies

Dick riding

And any derivatives, such as anal or group variations. The reverse is also true, it should be made clear any unwanted sexual advances by the straight boy in question will not be tolerated or ignored"

4 fatherhood rights

"In the case of any unwanted pregnancies, the man should always be allowed (if not required) to provide economical assistance and support. Few things are as heartbreaking to a straight man as feeling as thou he is not needed to raise his children, or that he committed a 'pump and dump'. As in impregnated a woman and will not have to care about the baby."

Having finished your e-mail, you hit send in the middle of Sunday morning. If your calculations are correct, the principal should be able to create a new "anti-straight" code of conduct and pass it on to students before the afternoon, meaning everything will be in motion before Monday

You smile and lean back on your chair, already imagining how great it's gonna be to be 'discriminated' against by morning