Afternoon haze

John walked into the room for his last class of the day in a largely dejected mood. His first session after lunch had been a bust; between having to focus on the finer points of a period of history that bored him to tears and his private thoughts spiraling around fantasies of curvy older women, he’d not managed to accomplish anything towards his goals. He’d even been too distracted to Observe his classmates, although that was less of an issue now he’d completed the first optional Quest Objective. He had at least managed to find one more item of interest in between lessons; passing by one of Ashcroft’s trophy cases, he’d spotted an odd looking plaque that had produced an even more unusual result from Observe.

It wasn’t exactly amazing as far as out of place objects went - John personally ranked its usefulness to him as markedly below the egg timer save for the clear indication it gave that there was more out there than the mundane; his only real appreciation for the thing came from the fact that he was now on three out of the five odd objects he needed for his Quest.

To add to his woes, the last session of the day was all about religion. Normally, John viewed the subject with distaste - not due to any innate dislike of religion, but due to a feeling that it was a waste of his time; after all, Ashcroft was supposed to be an advanced study for adults to turn them into the leaders of tomorrow. At least, some bullshit marketing speak like that had been on all the fancy fliers that his mother had shown him when discussing his attending the place. How useful then was comparative theology, really? It wasn’t as if the real world had a need for clerics like the ones in his games.

Sitting back in his chair as the lecturer droned on about the links between various monotheistic religions, John considered that last thought with rather more care than usual. Clerics in the real world just stood in front of people, waved bibles around or booped people on the head with ceremonial paints and oils and stuff. But… there had been that woman - Moira - earlier. Her Class had been paladin, hadn’t it? And paladins were just clerics with extra armor and a line in divine smiting in most games. So, if paladins existed, why shouldn’t proper clerics? Or monks for that matter, of the ‘throw a million punches’ type rather than ‘be a hermit and live on a mountain alone’.

Grimacing to himself as he adjusted on the hard plastic seat, not for the first time wondering why this class out of all of them had to have the most uncomfortable chairs in the entire building, John pulled up his Status. He still had the Quest he’d been working on - regardless of anything else, he would be getting two Wisdom points, some Experience and at least one Item at midnight. But while he’d been focusing on getting that final optional Skill Up Reward, there was the matter of his other Quest to deal with. “Find your class”. Huh. How exactly did one go about finding a Class?

Brain on autopilot, John answered a question from the teacher regarding the short-lived Aten-worship in ancient Egypt without much effort; the information was in the textbook that everyone had open in front of them, after all. "If this were a game, getting a Class should be a matter of either doing an action or completing a Quest. I already have a Quest though, and it’s not giving me any clues,” John muttered under his breath, doodling in the margins of his notebook as he did so. “So it’s probably that I need to either find a trainer or do some specific action.”

Looking down at his textbook, he realized he’d written the word ACTION in all-caps, and circled it several times. Further up the page, his notes on Aten-worship included the word CLERIC; he’d written that in full capitals as well. Hesitantly, he drew a line connecting the two, then an arrowhead pointing towards cleric. “Action leads to a Class. And if clerics - or monks - are as fun as they are in games, that could work.” He grinned, his daydreams of Matilda now returning in full **** - her spilling something hot on her arm, him healing the burn, but of course then she’d have to take her top off for him to work, there’d be a lingering touch after she was healed, her lips mouthing her thanks as she slid down from her chair…

John shifted awkwardly in his seat; there was that arousal back again, and with it a stiffness that made sitting behind the low desks uncomfortable. Even with his small size, he was brushing up against the surface of the bottom of the desk, and if anyone looked over, he’d be even more of a laughing stock. Reaching down carefully to adjust himself, he moved his hand - and yelped.

Pulling his arm out from under the desk as everyone looked at him, he stared at a fragment of metal that protruded quite some way from the back of his hand. Blood was already beginning to ooze up from where the metal had pierced the skin. The lecturer took one shocked look and gestured to the door. “My goodness, Mister Newman. Go and see the nurse at once; I’ve been telling them for years that these desks are going to fall apart and injure someone. No, take your things - we’re almost done anyhow.”

Hurrying out of the class, glad of the distraction even if the injury felt only skin deep, John had made it halfway to the nurse’s office before he skidded to a halt. The blood wasn’t oozing too badly, so he paused and double checked his Status. Sure enough, there was that Gamer’s Body thing; so how was he bleeding? Damage was supposed to reduce his Health Points, didn’t that mean he wasn’t supposed to take wounds? He’d also lost a good four hp, which felt like rather a lot compared to the injury until he saw the Status Effect blinking at the bottom of the screen.

It didn’t feel like it was that big of an injury; it’d hurt, but bleeding wasn’t supposed to be a thing… John glanced at the shard of metal. No way, it couldn’t be. Could it? Starting to move towards the infirmary again, he cast Observe as he ran. After all, that bleed could be fatal if it lasted too long, he did only have forty-one Hit Points left, and dying of a minor stab to the hand would be utterly idiotic. The screen popped up a moment later, and he almost stumbled as he tried to read it and turn the corner at the same time.

Well, that was a fourth item for his collection of odd things and no mistake. The bit about absorbed magic was just another fun tidbit of info for how weird his life was becoming - and additionally he now knew that he could slow his rush to the infirmary down somewhat. Even if he bled for the full half an hour, he’d only drop by at most ten more hp. That was manageable, and more importantly the magical effect explained why his own abilities hadn’t prevented the wound from bleeding. On top of that, he’d also gained a really useful bit of information without having to get punched in the face by Frank; he’d been tempted to stand up to the bully earlier on the basis that he was immune to wounds as long as he had hp remaining - but now it was clear that while he might not get visible wounds, the damage would still hurt.

Sitting in the nurse’s office some time later while she bandaged his damaged hand and slathered what turned out to be a tiny cut with antiseptic, John managed to get a hold of the metal remnant while her back was turned and stored it in his Inventory. She’d left it under a bunch of empty packets from her cleaning of his wound - and thankfully, when she returned with a small booklet on the possible diseases he should watch out for after being injured, she just tossed the entire tray into the bin without checking the contents.

Assuring the woman that he’d definitely go to the hospital if he showed any signs of the myriad of potential issues a stab by old metal could cause, John hurried out; if he ran, he could probably make the earlier town bus rather than having to get the Ashcroft one, which would let him do that shopping his mother had asked him to do far sooner. There was a reason for his haste now; he’d had an epiphany while getting his hand bandaged. His favorite classes in games at the moment were monks and clerics - and one thing they both had in common was meditation. He’d never tried it seriously before, but now, as soon as he could get home and get somewhere he wouldn’t be disturbed, he intended to meditate for as long as it took if it’d kick-start his Class. The other optional Quest he had remaining was probably a bust now anyway - it seemed unlikely he’d find the final object before midnight. Better to concentrate on the Class related one for now and then see what the Rewards he’d already earned were like.