Adventurer's Peril, by Regin34

“Three friends out on the road in a fantatical land and the challenges on their quest.”

“You know you are in for a good time when there is typo in the description of the story.”

“Now, don't say this Marcie, I am sure the story can still be pfft...good...bwahahahaha.”

“Ahahahahaha!”

“So what have we this time? Fantasy? Meh, I guess it was only a matter of time until we enter Middle Nerd.”

“Indeed, this time we are reading Adventurer's Peril, by Regin34”

“Looks like a decent amount of likes tough.”

“Unfortunately, likes are not indicative of quality, My impression of the readers of this site remains frighteningly low.”

“Well, yeah, what else is new?”

“So, before we start I actually have to clarify something. This story is co written, meaning the author changes from chapter to chapter.”

“No doubt, this will do wonders for the consistency of the writing.”

“I do think it's an interesting exercise, there are some fairly popular works who do this, like the book series Wildcards.”

“Did we get permission from both authors to screw them over and do we even care?”

“No and no. Shall we begin?”

READING IN PROGRESS (BGM)

(7 chapters in)

“...”

“...”

“Well...how do I put this nicely...?”

“This guys grammar and syntax is revolting.”

“H-hey...”

“And I'm being courteous here, you can't have titles like “Pleasant ask for help. (Tipical) and expect me to not call you out on it.¨

“Really Marcie? Do I have to be the nice one, this time around? I hate being the nice one.”

“You can be what you want, because I will not suffer this travesty.”

“I mean half of the chapters where decent.”

“Indubitably, and that makes it even worse. His co-writer clearly has a decent enough grasp on the English language. Why didn't he help his partner out by proofreading? Actually according to some comments he has two proofreaders? HOW? Are you trying to tell me that this is not the first draft? That this slob of linguistic vomit actually got trough some sort of quality control? What is next? Are we to allow the laws of physic to change at a whim as well? Have we found the Philosophers Stone? Is perpetual motion on the horizon? Why is Gamestop up 2000%? That is preposterous! Unacceptable! No, I refuse to believe it! This can't exist! And yet it does! This construct of haphazardly thrown together letters is questioning my grasp on reality! Have I gone mad, Gina? I have, have I? What other explanation could there possible be? This is it! The end times are upon us! The very fabric of time and space is convulsing around us and soon the great old ones will rise up from R'lyeh! Oh tidings of madness and woe! Take me now, for the ones who got eaten first are the fortunate ones! Komm süsser . Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn! I̵̬̟͘ ̷̱̝͕͜͝s̸̫̲͑͘̚͠ȇ̷̜é̶̪̮̭͇̃̾̿͝ ̸͚̖̆Ȳ̶̗͔̓̾̈́o̵̬̟̯͙͍͑̅̾̈́ų̶͎̀̏ Ah!...ack...wheeze....wzgrfl!”

“Marcie!”

TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES

“Um...Master should be fine. She is just . Lets let her rest for a couple hours.”

“Oh wow, that got me scared for a sec there. Although reading this was almost worth it, just to see Marcie turn purple like that, bwahahahaha!”

“But who is going to finish reading the story now?”

“I don't know and I don't care, we just post what we have and call it a day.”

“But that is mean! The author surely put lot of work in it! We can't just let his dedication go to waste!”

“God, your such an obnoxious little shit! Fine! How about YOU finish it then?”

“M-me?”

“Well Marcie is sure as hell not gonna do it. So it's either you or you.”

“Alright! I do it!” clenches fists

“Bah.”

READING IN PROGRESS AGAIN (BGM)

“And we are done!”

“Y-yeah...that was quite the naughty story...”

“I guess you should start by introducing yourself. You know for the 2 people that give a shit.”

“Ah yes! H-hello! My name is Frank.”

“We call him Cutie tough.”

“A-and i'm Masters Servant.”

“More like Marcie's and boytoy, no idea what she sees in you, but whatever you will have to do.”

“D-do what?”

“Summarize this sordid tale you just read.”

“Umm...alright I try. So it's a story about three girls that set out on a quest to find some missing girls. Its a human, halfelf and an elf! Mira, Khala and Ariane!”

“Oh, wow you actually bothered to remember.”

“Well, it would be mean to the author not to, right?”

“Oh yes, we care very much about the authors feeling here, do carry on.”

“So...they come across a cart stuck in the mud...of course they tried to help but then....then.”

“Yup, time.”

“That was awful, they poor girls just wanted to help and got tricked by two evil mages.”

“That's why you never help anybody.”

“T-they then chanced to come upon a lake and...”

“Hold it.”

“Y-yes?”

“Do you understand the concept of summarizing? You don't have to mention every little detail!”

“But what if it's important for the plot! They also met Lex there!”

“Who cares! The Girls settle down for the night, have more sexy time, then suddenly Goblins! Lot's of and ensues and eventual the girls save the day and rescue the kidnapped girls. THE END! Christ, i'm having a headache. Feels like Marcie was the lucky one.”

“I don't think it was that bad tough. The writing really improved around 10 chapters in.”

“Looks like the Author DID get a proofreader eventually, but they didn't bother to patch up the first few chapters, you know the ones that are supposed to make a good impression?”

“But if you get trough this you actually get a very exciting adventure, full of danger!”

“And horny mages.”

“T-there was a lot of s-sex....it was kinda embarrassing.”

“Ah yes, this is the part where Marcie is always asking me if I masturbated to it. I guess this is my job now as well, so did you jack off to it?”

“W-what?”

“You heard me.”

“I-i..that's private!”

“You don't have any privacy, so spill the beans!”

“O-of course I didn't! That's way too embarrassing!”

“You aren't lying are you? We have cameras in here, you know.”

“I'm telling the truth!”

“Tch, lame, so next is...favorite scene...ah yes, what was your favorite scene?”

“Hmmm, I found the final fight in the cave very exciting! I almost thought the girls where doomed. My hearth skipped a beat when the goblins actually managed to wound them!”

“As if that author had the balls to kill his characters off. The villains on the other hand die way too easily. Like that evil mage. Why did that archer guy get the kill anyway and not the mage who got ? She should have cut his dick off and kicked him down a cliff. That's what I would have done anyway. something now, bastard! Muahahahahaha!”

“Uhh...but I also really liked the ending!”

“Oh, when they all walked home naked?”

“N-not because of that. It was just a nice, happy ending.”

“Well, for the first quest anyways, there is apparently more stuff, but it's not finished, and I'm not starting another plotline that stops RIGHT WHEN THINGS GET INTERESTING!”

“In any case I enjoyed reading it.”

“The only enjoyment I got out of this was seeing Marcie lose her mind.”

“Ah yes, we should probably carry her to bed.”

“Or we strip her naked and toss her outside!”

“I...take care of her. So everyone thanks for having me, this was very fun and I really enjoyed the story! Please clean up the beginning few chapters tough, I think this will go a long way of making the story more accessible. So anyway, bye, bye!”

“Go fuck yourself.”