ALICE Ch 295

Glynda pauses in the hallway to cough into her elbow. If she has Covid again, she is going to kill someone with an axe. Maybe everyone. She gets out an N95 mask and puts it on, then lets herself into Alice’s room.

The bathroom door is closed, and muffled voices come from within.

“See? That’s not so bad,” Kylie says.

“I’m just struggling with this being an OK thing to do. A toy is one thing, but for some reason it being my finger makes it seem not cool.”

“You’re very cool, Alice. Come on. We’ll make Faye proud.”

“Oh my god. The sad thing is that you’re right. She’s gonna be so stoked. What am I doing with my life?”

“Well, today you upset everyone by taking needless risks to faff about with your old friend.”

“Who, Val? Look, if she wants to be the next Lewis Hamilton, I’m gonna make her work for it,” Alice says.

“Less chat, more, er… you know. Get it in there.”

“Farther than this?”

“Alice, you’re barely doing it.”

“Because I feel like I’m not supposed to touch this! Am I going to hell?”

“No. It’s fine.”

“And this stuff is cold.”

“Were you always such a whiner? Think of Faye.”

“I don’t have a choice but to think about Faye. She texts me every five seconds and she can’t type so she’s doing it all with voice to text and she talks funny so it’s all completely unhinged shit that makes no sense,” Alice says, frustrated.

“OK, mate. Quit being salty. The idea is to relax. You have to take deep breaths and properly relax. Your whole body. Down there too. Think about your cooldown.”

“Thinking about getting handjobs from you is not going to help me calm down.”

“You’re sweet. I mean actually cooling down properly. Deep breaths through your nose, out slowly through your mouth. You have to let it all go.”

“OK. I’m trying.”

“Shut up and breathe.”

“You’re not my real mom,” Alice says.

It’s quiet for a moment. Glynda stares at the bathroom door in utter confusion.

“A little more,” Kylie says.

“Like this?”

“That’s it. How’s that feel?”

“Weird.”

“OK, good enough. I’ll do the rest. Here’s what it’ll be like, Alice. It’ll feel strange and it’ll be uncomfortable at first, but then suddenly it’ll be in there and the discomfort will be gone. Having it in isn’t uncomfortable. The uncomfortable part is just getting the widest bit in. All right? But the more you relax, the easier it goes. OK?”

“OK,” Alice says uneasily.

“Relax.”

“I’m relaxed.”

“You’re not! Your bloody knuckles are white. And your…”

There’s a pause. “What? My what is what?”

“It’s very cute, Alice. Breathe.”

“Dude, I’m trying.”

“And I’m running out of patience. You know I can just shove it right in there anytime I want, right?”

“Can you not say things like that?”

“I could be in bed with an Italian lady who looks like a young Indira Varma right now.”

“Who?”

“She’s an actress. OK, relax or die.”

“What? Oh!”

“Easy. Easy.”

“Jesus!”

There is some labored breathing, but it doesn’t sound like they’re having sex. Glynda adjusts her mask, feeling another cough coming on. Her throat hurts.

A sudden, sharp gasp comes from the bathroom. It’s followed by a sharp slap and a yelp.

“There you go! Good job, mate.”

“Fuck me,” Alice says. “People do this for fun?”

“You’ll get the hang of it. Should I take a picture for Faye?”

“I will break your phone.”

“I didn’t even bring it. How do you feel?”

“Weird, mostly. It’s cold. It doesn’t hurt though. It did for a second, but now it’s OK. It’s so weird. I can’t move. Ah! Yikes!”

“Yeah. What now?”

“I guess I’m supposed to jerk off and then tell Faye that I enjoyed it.”

There’s another pause. “I kind of want to see.”

“Uh uh. Faye wouldn’t care about you helping me out with the, uh, technical stuff, but that? I dunno.”

“Oh, come on. I’ll be all the way across the room. Not like it’ll take long. Look at you,” Kylie says.

FF1

Inside the bathroom, Alice still leans on the sink, breathing hard. The plug is inside her, and she is rock hard. Her erection feels a little strange. It’s twitchier and drooling more than usual. Her whole body feels sensitive.

Should she let Kylie watch?