A tragic labor

As for your pregnancy, there was no way in hell you were going to carry the child of a ****. You try and abort you really do but it never works.

The day after the **** you attempt to morning after pills once the police let you go but everywhere you go, they are sold out. You cannot believe it but it takes a week before you get morning after pills. At that point they are no longer helpful.

Your next attempt is with the clinic but they refuse service without proper ID which you have none of. Jessie and you then have to go through so many hoops to get IDs that by the time you do the clinic will not grant an abortion because you are too advanced.

You hate your unborn child as it grows, you had not wanted it and it had ruined your life, more so than anyone can realize. The day of your labor that changes.

"Push," says the doctor as another contraction racks your body.

You squeeze Jessie's hand and your face goes red. With a final push the child is born. You take several deep breathes before noticing the eerie silence.

"I'm so sorry," says the doctor as she wraps the baby.

"What about?" you ask panting and knitting your eye brows with concern.

She is unable to meet your gaze as she replies, "still born, the baby didn't make it."

You grip Jessie's hand even tighter, your face a blank slate. Jessie's eyes slowly grow wider and his lips part in a stupor as he looks at the wrapped-up infant.

"Do you..do you want to see?" asks the doctor a tremor in her voice.

"No," you say in a hushed voice and drop your gaze.

The doctor departs without another word leaving Jessie and you alone.

You break the silence first, "that isn't fair."

Jessie only manages a whisper, "what?"

Correcting your previous statement, "I wasn't fair."

"What do you mean?" asks Jessie slowly turning to you.

"I never gave the kid a chance. Hated it from the begin," you close your legs slowly.

"Who could blame you? It was **** and look what it's done to you," Jessie squeezes your hand.

You turn to him, "that doesn't matter. It wasn't the kids fault." Tears start welling in your eyes. "Am I a monster?"

Jessie voice shakes, "what? Of course not."

"Then why did it take the **** of an innocent child before I realized what I'd done, what I would've done," unable to hold out any longer you burst into tears.

For nine long months you had been brooding and hating your unborn child. With the child gone you, your miss placed hatred has nowhere to go. You would have made a horrible mother which only makes it worse.