A lobby, a stairwell, a hallway, and three apartments

The building’s lobby is a wreck. The mailboxes look intact, though.

“Can I check my mail?” you ask Sigrid. “Assuming my key still works?”

She nods. The mailbox lock sticks a bit, but then opens cleanly.

“Oh, good!” you say, as you extract the power bill that must have arrived yesterday morning. You hold it up to show Sigrid. It’s a bit scorched, but still legible. “See? Name and address, right here.”

“Keep that with you,” she recommends. “You might need it again later.”

“Thank god you didn’t switch all your bills to online,” Eleanor points out.

Past the lobby, there are two staircases. The one on the right is clearly blocked by debris, so you take the left one.

“Do we know what started the fire?” you ask, as the three of you carefully make your way past the second floor.

“Larry fell asleep smoking,” Eleanor grumbles. “Fucking Larry.”

You’ve never learned Larry’s last name (although you know it begins with “T”, and you’re 90% confident he’s of Germanic descent), but of all the neighbors you’ve had in all the places you’ve lived, the 75-year-old was the worst for a whole bunch of reasons that would make you angry to think about.

“The ambulance was running its siren when they took him away, so I guess he was still alive then,” she adds.

“I didn’t hear about anyone having died in this fire,” Sigrid says. “Although I’m not sure I would have.”

The hallway on the third floor is a mess, with the doors to all four apartments at least **** open, if not broken completely out of their frames, and wind blowing through the smashed-open windows. Sigrid looks grim. You feel sick. Eleanor starts to cry.

“Hug?” you offer, and she wraps her arms around you and weeps into your shoulder. You hug her back. Sigrid gives you a questioning look; you nod, and she joins the hug. Eleanor stiffens for a second, but doesn’t object.

Your phone is buzzing quietly, and after a moment you realize that hugging two pretty girls like this is starting to give you an erection. Which is absolutely inappropriate in this time and place, no matter how you feel about someone.

Although, part of your brain says, isn’t there a cliché about people getting horny in the aftermath of disasters? Celebrating the fact that we’re still alive?, and for a second you imagine fucking Sigrid while Eleanor sits on her face, moaning in ecstasy as you reach for no, stop, not here, and anyway she doesn’t feel that way, does she? Plus she’s crying, and your dick goes soft.

After a few minutes, Eleanor’s sobs ease to a sniffly halt, and you and Sigrid let her go.

“Thank you,” Eleanor says. “I’m so lucky I know you.” She leans forward, hesitates visibly, and then kisses you on the cheek. Then she kisses Sigrid on the cheek too; Sigrid blushes almost as hard as when she asked about your erections, but smiles.

“Let’s do my place first?” you suggest, and Sigrid and Eleanor follow you in through what’s left of the door.

Some of your apartment isn’t as bad as you were expecting, but some of it is a lot worse. You take photos of your ruined TV, your ruined gaming console, your ruined chair…

Eventually, you take a photo of your bed. Some of the blankets look like they could be salvaged, but for the most part it’s very clearly a lost cause. At least you cried about it last night, so it feels like that’s out of your system.

Although, you realize, you’ve been staring at your bed for over a minute.

Eleanor nudges you. “I had a lot of daydreams about the first time I’d get to see your bed,” she says, with a rueful grin. “This doesn’t hold up.”

Your eyebrows go up. The incident in the hallway, admittedly, was not the first time you’d fantasized about Eleanor – or even the fifty-first – but you could have sworn she only thought of you as a friendly neighbor. You don’t have time to dig into that right now, though. Dammit.

“Can I check in my closet?” you ask Sigrid, and she nods. The contents of the closet, remarkably, look pretty intact – clothes, DVDs, books, some USB keys… although, you realize, any or all of your digital media might be dead too.

In principle you’d like to take everything that even looks like it could be intact, but there’s way too much to carry. You don’t even have a backpack (you had a very nice backpack, but it was by the door and it looks ruined). “I can come back tomorrow with a car and get everything worth salvaging, yeah?”

“Uh huh,” Sigrid says. “If I’m not the one out front, just give whoever it is my name and badge number. And make sure you document everything you take out.”

Just in case you need more proof, you take a picture of Sigrid, and a close-up of her badge, and then pass your phone to Eleanor so she can take one of you and Sigrid together.

“You have a car now?” Eleanor asks as she hands back your phone, and the three of you leave your apartment. It feels really weird to not bother closing the door.

“No, but I have a friend who offered to help.”

She smiles, and you and Sigrid follow her through what’s left of her door. “I’m glad. I worried about you not having enough friends. Is that who you’re staying with?”

“No, I’m staying with my sister and her daughter.”

She pulls out her phone and takes a picture of her ruined sofa.

“Hold on,” you say, “what resolution is your camera?”

She blinks. “Not sure. Why?”

“Could I see?”

She passes you her phone, and you examine it.

“...yeah, mine is much higher-res, and I’ve got more storage. I could take the pictures for you?”

Eleanor looks delighted. “Oh! Yes! Thank you so much!” she says, and clasps your hand. Sigrid smiles at that.

You take a fresh picture of her sofa. “So where did you spend last night?”

“I’m staying at my sister’s place too,” she says, and points you towards the ruins of her TV.

“Miranda, right? How is she?”

“She’s great, thanks for asking! Very worried about me, obviously, this is all so sudden.”

You take a picture of the remains of her computer. “Raul should have his cast off by now, yeah? Has he started physio yet?”

“It just came off last week. And yeah, he’s in physio. Thank god for workman’s comp.”

Eleanor leads you around her apartment and points to various items. Picture, picture, picture. “I bet Vincent was excited to have Tia Eleanor staying over?”

She nods. “He was, yup. Asked me a ton of questions about fire trucks.”

Picture, picture. “What’s his favorite dinosaur this week?”

She blinks. “How did you know he has one!”

“He’s six. Of course he has a favorite dinosaur.”

Sigrid and Eleanor both laugh at that.

“This week, he likes the ankylosaurus,” Eleanor says, enunciating the last word.

“Oh!” you say. “The one with the club tail?”

Sigrid’s face lights up. “Yes!” she says. “You like dinosaurs?!”

You shrug – picture, picture – then remember something weird. “Actually, wait, are ankylosaurs technically dinosaurs?”

Sigrid tilts her head. “… yes? That’s why they have the -saur name?”

“I remember seeing something about how they were like a hundred million years before dinosaurs?”

She frowns. “Uh, no?”

“The ones with the big curved backs?” You outline the general shape with your finger. Picture, picture, picture.

“Oh! No, you’re thinking of dimetrodon, the ones with the big sail-fin on their backs. They were Permian era, that was thirty million years pre-dinosaur.”

“And… wasn’t there also a mammal with a club tail? Glip something?”

“Glyptodon, yeah! Pliocene era!” Sigrid says with a huge smile.

You shake your head. “I’m sorry,” you say. “It’s been way too long since I read about dinosaurs, so the details are… vague.” Picture, picture.

“There’s a new exhibit at the Natural History Museum next week!” she says, excited. “Wanna go with me?”

You blink. “I mean, I’ll have to check my schedule, but… sure?” Picture, picture.

There’s a buzz from your phone… followed, seconds later, by a different buzz, which you recognize as your appointment reminder.

“Anything else?” you ask Eleanor.

She hesitates. “Uh… my closet?”

You wince. That side of Eleanor’s apartment shared a wall with Larry’s, so the heat damage is probably worse. “Well… let’s take a look,” you say.

She hesitates again, then sighs and opens the closet door. Inside are clothes, shoes, blankets, and a cardboard box of half-melted rubbery plastic things, which you abruptly realize are dildos.

“I…” she says, then blushes. You pretend you didn’t notice, and take a picture of the contents of the closet… and then one at a slightly different angle, so that the box isn’t visible.

“Okay, is that everything?” you ask once you’re done.

She nods. “Me and Miranda will come back later with the truck to get my stuff,” she says to Sigrid. “Is that okay?”

Sigrid makes sure Eleanor has her name and badge number too, and then they pose for a picture together – again, just in case Eleanor needs extra proof.

As the three of you make your way towards the stairwell, a gust of wind through the broken windows shoves the door to your neighbor Graham’s apartment all the way open.

You and Eleanor look at each other, eyes wide. “Banana,” you both say.

Sigrid blinks. “What?”

“Graham has a pet rabbit named Banana,” you explain urgently. “I don’t know if Graham was able to get him out –”

“Graham wasn’t here when the fire started!” Eleanor says.

“He stays in his hutch during the day, so –”

Sigrid holds up a hand, cutting you off. “I’m only letting you do this because the door’s open. You can only look to see if he’s in his hutch. Don’t touch anything else. If Banana’s still alive, take him, but if he’s not, leave him for Graham to find.”

You and Eleanor both make dismayed noises.

“I don’t want to be a hardass here, because I really like both of you, but if we’re not rescuing a bunny, we have no grounds to be in Graham’s apartment and I could get in trouble just for letting you go in, much less take anything out.”

You sigh. “Good point.”

The three of you walk inside carefully. You keep your hands behind your back so as to not touch anything.

Ten steps in, you see the hutch. The plastic is a little melted and scorched, and some wreckage has fallen on it, but overall it looks intact. Inside you can see the large black lump that is Banana.

He’s trembling, but alive.

“Oh thank god,” the three of you say in unison. You’d laugh, but right now it’s not funny.

“Let’s get him down to the car,” Sigrid says.

“Graham has rabbit food, I can get–” Eleanor begins. Sigrid cuts her off. “You can bring the water bottle because it’s part of the hutch. Don’t touch anything else,” she says firmly, and Eleanor nods.

The combined hutch-and-rabbit isn’t that heavy, but it’s bulky, especially since you have to keep it oriented along the proper axis, so Sigrid helps you carry it into the stairwell.

“I’ll call Graham, he’ll be so relieved!” Eleanor says.

Sigrid manages to facepalm with one hand while not letting go of the hutch with the other. “You know how to contact him?”

“I’m… pretty sure I do, yeah? … oh. Shit.”

“Tell him we’re at the building, tell him his door is wrecked, and ask him if we can go in to check if Banana’s okay,” you recommend. “Once he says yes, we’ll pretend we’re going in and rescuing him, and then you can ask if he has rabbit food.” Sigrid raises an eyebrow at that, but doesn’t argue.

As anticipated, Graham frantically gives you permission to enter his apartment and rescue Banana, and for Eleanor to retrieve the bag of pellets. Then you and Sigrid carry the hutch down the three flights of stairs. “Ba-na-na,” you say repeatedly in what you hope is a soothing tone. “Good bunny. Good boy. Ba-na-na good bunny. Such a good boy. Such a good Ba-na-na.”

“He knows his name?” Sigrid asks, and you nod. “They’re pretty smart,” Eleanor says.

“Poor little guy must be traumatized,” Sigrid says as you carry him through the lobby and out onto the street. She opens the back door to the police car; you maneuver the hutch onto the back seat, and then Sigrid refills Banana’s slightly melted water bottle from her own water bottle. Banana starts drinking immediately. Eleanor drops a handful of pellets through the bars.

The three of you watch him for a minute, then you sigh. “I need to go, I’m sorry,” you tell them. “I have an appointment with my insurance company in a half hour, and then I’m stopping in at work.”

“They’re making you work today?!? After the fire?!?” Sigrid and Eleanor are both outraged on your behalf.

“No, no,” you assure them, “but I do need to talk to my manager about time off.”

This is true, although you omit the part about having lunch with your manager, because you’re not totally sure how they’d feel about it. They accept this, and then they both call you to make sure their numbers are on your phone.

“Call me any time you need to talk,” Eleanor says, gazing into your eyes. “Any time. No matter what.”

“I’ll send you my work schedule,” Sigrid says. “You can call me to talk whenever I’m off duty. You can call me whenever I’m on duty, too, but I might not be able to answer right away. So text me first?”

You promise them both that you’ll call them, and then head for the bus stop, which is two and a half blocks away. You don’t regret the extra ten minutes it took to rescue Banana, but you are not gonna catch that bus unless you run.

So you run. You do manage to catch the bus, just barely, but you’re panting and wheezing.

You slump into a seat, take a few minutes to catch your breath, and then pull out your phone. You’re interested to see what the app says about what just happened, but you do have something else you need to do first.

You text Sigrid and Eleanor.

“Please tell Graham:

the cop let us go into your apartment to rescue banana before we called you, because we told her it was an emergency and because Eleanor didn’t realize she had your contact details. The cop didn’t let us touch anything else, not even the bag of pellets. Once we were out in the hall, Eleanor found your number in her phone, but it would have been more complicated to explain that at the time and we needed to get banana out of the building so we could give him water. Really sorry.”

A minute later, Sigrid responds with a whole row of thumb’s-up emojis and exclamation points. Eleanor’s response is “that’s a good idea, thanks”.

Now you can look at the Multiplier.

Although, to be honest, you’ve still got a stitch in your side from running, which really sucks. Maybe the Multiplier can do something for that? But this doesn’t feel like something that could be helped by a “Global Attribute”.

You open up your own profile. When you glanced at this yesterday, it just had options to view “Personal Information” and “Physical Information” – there was no “Personal Attributes” section like there is for Tammy (and presumably for Molly and Penelope and Sigrid and Eleanor and even Sonia).

Maybe that’s changed now?

...no. Well, that’s disappointing.

Suddenly, the bus screeches to a halt and its horn blasts, startling you so badly you nearly drop your phone. The driver swears loudly at someone.

“What just happened?” you ask the man next to you.

He shrugs. “Some asshole ran the red light and went right in front of us, I think. Dumbfuck is lucky he didn’t get killed.”

You nod, and look at the app again.

Now there is a Personal Attributes section in your profile.

Would that idiot have driven through the intersection if you hadn’t been looking for a Personal Attributes section just then, you wonder. Probably no way to know.

You open it and skim through the options, looking… aha!

Steel-Driving Man: 2500 points (You will have greatly increased stamina in all physical activities)

And you have exactly 2500 points. So you buy it. The pain in your side vanishes immediately, and you feel like you could run more, although you hope you won’t need to.

Now that that’s dealt with, you take a look at what the app has to say about Sigrid and Eleanor.

As you expected, you now have profiles for both of them. Sigrid’s has a picture of her with her hand inside the hutch, petting Banana.

Name: Sigrid Amalia Petersen

Personal Information -

• Age: 29
• Gender: Female
• Marriage Status: Single
• Children: 0

Physical Information -

• Height: 5’10 1/2”
• Weight: 164
• Eyes: Blue
• Hair: Platinum blond (currently shaved)
• Bust: 36C
• Waist: 26
• Hips: 36
• Sexual experience
• -– Oral: Nonvirgin – Inactive
• –- Vagina: Nonvirgin – Inactive
• –- Anus: Nonvirgin – Inactive

It’s been three years since Michael dumped her, you remember.

Eleanor’s profile has a picture of her leaning on the police car and talking on her phone.

Name: Eleanor Gertrude Rodriguez Villalobos

Personal Information -

• Age: 32
• Gender: Female
• Marriage Status: Divorced
• Children: 0

Physical Information -

• Height: 5’5”
• Weight: 160
• Eyes: Brown
• Hair: Black (currently with dyed blue streak)
• Bust: 38D
• Waist: 28
• Hips: 38
• Sexual experience:
• – Oral: Nonvirgin – Inactive
• – Vagina: Nonvirgin – Inactive
• – Anus: Virgin

You consider looking at their sexual histories, but are more interested – right now, anyway – in learning how they feel about you, so you call up the history.

• Sigrid Petersen: You didn’t even acknowledge her. -1 (-1)

Whoops.

• Sigrid Petersen: Hat rescue!: +5 (4)
• Sigrid Petersen: You asked an intelligent question about her motivations: +4 (8)
• Sigrid Petersen: “Oh no, are they okay?”: +5 (13)
• Sigrid Petersen: “Fuck cancer.”: +4 (17)
• Sigrid Petersen: “You’re very pretty!”: +10 (27)
• Sigrid Petersen: Caught you looking at her tits: +5 Lust (27/0/5)
• Sigrid Petersen: You didn’t deny it, but also you weren’t crude about it: +2/0/0 (29/0/5)
• Sigrid Petersen: Thinks you’re cute: 0/0/+3 (29/0/8)
• Sigrid Petersen: Likes that you’re taller than her: 0/0/+1 (29/0/9)
• Sigrid Petersen: “Michael’s loss.”: +8/0/0 (37/0/9)
• Sigrid Petersen: You listened. You really listened: +7/+4/0 (44/4/9)
• Sigrid Petersen: Likes that you’re funny, and that you give her a chance to be funny too: +4/4/0 (48/8/9)
• Sigrid Petersen: Likes that you care about historical accuracy: +3/+1/0 (51/9/9)
• Sigrid Petersen: Reached 50 affection: Love Unlocked; Lust Unlocked. 500 points awarded.
• Hunka Hunka Burnin Love: Love started above 0 for someone. 100 points awarded.
• I’m Too Sexy: Lust started above 0 for someone. 100 points awarded.
• Sigrid Petersen: Is a little uncertain about your attitude towards her scalp: 0/0/-1 (51/9/8)

Huh. She took that seriously?

• Sigrid Petersen: You apologized even though it honestly wasn’t a big deal: +1/0/0 (52/9/8)
• Sigrid Petersen: Sexy banter!: +8/+1/+8 (60/10/16)
• Sigrid Petersen: Just realized she asked you about your erection: 0/0/+12 (60/10/28)
• Sigrid Petersen: You told her she gives you an erection: +8/+10/+14 (68/20/42)
• Sigrid Petersen: The names thing was hilarious!: +1/+1/0 (69/21/42)
• Sigrid Petersen: Feels so sorry for you: 0/+2/0 (69/23/42)
• Sigrid Petersen: Oh my god, that hug: +4/+11/0 (73/34/42)
• Sigrid Petersen: Asking you for ID is totally reasonable: -2/0/-1 (71/34/41)
• Sigrid Petersen: Thank you for being sensible: +2/0/0 (73/34/41)
• Sigrid Petersen: It’s nice to have a chance to be helpful: +1/0/0 (74/34/41)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: Is so relieved you’re okay: +9/+8/+4 (40/30/38)

Your eyebrows go up. Those scores are a lot higher than you would have expected for “lived across the hall for almost three years; carried groceries, helped move furniture, fixed internet, sampled cooking; had occasional – well, okay, semifrequent – conversations.”

• Eleanor Rodriguez: You actually made it easy to talk to a cop!: +4/+3/0 (44/33/38)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: You held her hand when she was scared to go into the building: +6/+5/0 (50/38/38)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: You held her when she cried: +7/+10/0 (57/48/38)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: Reached 50 Affection: Love Unlocked; Lust Unlocked. 500 points awarded.
• Hunka Hunka Burnin Love: Love started above 0 for someone. 100 points awarded.
• I’m Too Sexy: Lust started above 0 for someone. 100 points awarded.
• Sigrid Petersen: You’re so kind to Eleanor!: +1/+8/0 (75/42/41)

Oh, right – you turned off jealousy. Maybe you could have told them you were going to have lunch with Penelope.

• Eleanor Rodriguez: Is positive she felt your erection: -1/+1/+10 (56/49/48)

Whoops.

Also, you can lose affection while gaining in love and lust? Huh.

• Eleanor Rodriguez: Is relieved you’re respectful enough to not try anything right here and now: +2/+1/0 (58/50/48)
• Hearts and Flowers: Got someone to 50 Love. Aww. 100 points awarded.
• Eleanor Rodriguez: Got to kiss you, even if it was only on the cheek: 0/+1/+5 (58/51/53)
• Peaches and Eggplants: Got someone to 50 Lust. Mmm. 100 points awarded.
• Eleanor Rodriguez: You’re sad and she wants you to feel better: 0/+2/0 (58/53/53)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: Hinted to you that she’s been fantasizing about you for a long time: 0/0/+3 (58/53/56)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: You offered to help with the picture-taking: +3/0/0 (61/53/56)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: You remembered everyone’s personal details: +10/+4/0 (71/57/56)
• Sigrid Petersen: You gave her a chance to talk about dinosaurs: +6/+9/0 (81/51/41)
• Hearts and Flowers: Got someone to 50 Love. Aww. 100 points awarded.
• Eleanor Rodriguez: You pretended you didn’t see her dildos: +2/+5/+4 (73/62/60)
• Sigrid Petersen: You want to help rescue a bunny: +1/+3/0 (82/54/41)
• Sigrid Petersen: You made her be the hardass: -1/-1/0 (81/53/41)
• Sigrid Petersen: Thank you for being sensible: +2/+1/0 (83/54/41)
• Sigrid Petersen: That’s a pretty glib lie you just told there, buddy: -6/-3/0 (77/51/41)

Oh shit, that’s right: most people would just let something like that go, but most people aren’t cops.

• Sigrid Petersen: It’s really nice seeing you be kind to a bunny: +2/+4/0 (79/55/41)
• Sigrid Petersen: Feels protective of you: +1/+2/0 (80/57/41)
• Eleanor Rodriguez: Feels protective of you: +1/+1/0 (74/63/60)
• Sigrid Petersen: Is relieved that you’re honest: +6/+4/+1 (86/61/42)
• Hello, Indiana Jones: Unlocked the secret Personal Attributes store for yourself. 200 points awarded.
• Hello, Charles Atlas: Bought a personal attribute that makes a physical change to yourself, for the first time. 300 points awarded.

Hm.

This is very interesting, and you’re not 100% sure what to do with all this information about Sigrid and Eleanor – but what you are sure of is that if you think about it in too much detail, you’ll get another erection, and there are other people on the bus. And although Sigrid would almost definitely love to see it, you don’t think other cops would feel the same way.

How many more stops to your appointment?

You check your current location on the bus route app. Then you double-check the insurance company’s address and realize that what you thought was a 3 is actually an 8, and that this bus won’t take you as close to where you need to be as you wanted.

You swear, get off at the next stop, and then run another block and a half to your insurance agent’s office.