A Step Forward, a Voice from Behind

“I don’t.. It’s just.. Aagh I don’t even know where to start,” fumed Grace, throwing her good arm up in frustration.

“You don’t have to-” Ethan tried to speak.

“No, I do,” countered Grace, cutting Ethan off, her thoughts going back to the fight with the dungeon boss. “I’ve been putting this off for how long now? Harris was right to ask you about it. They let us take risks in E-ranked dungeons, and we’ve seen how those are dangerous enough. We’re never moving up to D rank without me taking a Bond.”

The room fell silent with quiet agreement.

She pressed on, her eyes meeting the others in turn. “So, that means getting my reservations out into the open instead of keeping them to myself. When I take a step back and look at the team without the idea of needing to Bond, it’s everything I want. I don’t have any complaints there. I’m worried that Bonding will fuck that up.”

“How?” Penny prodded gently. “I mean, when you say you’re worried that Bonding will mess things up, what specifically worries you?

“Sex can make things weird,” blurted Grace, scanning their faces, seeing the agreement on everyone’s expression. “See? If I learned anything from my ex, it was how sex can be used to plaster over problems. We’d have an argument and end up in bed without ever resolving it. Right now, when there’s an issue, we talk about it. I’m worried that would change.”

“I don’t want to speak for everyone, but I haven’t felt that pressure,” interjected Alice. “But… I get that it’s different for me, Ethan and I have known each other forever.”

“I agonized over the same thing, Grace,” confessed Mei. “That if I allowed Ethan and I to grow close, more than teammates, we’d end up being.. Worse off for it?”

“What changed your mind? Grace asked earnestly, wanting to banish her own skepticism at the idea.

“The month with you here on the team,” explained Mei. “I saw how Ethan and Penny worked together. You’ve seen them, neither of them hold back on their criticism just because they’ve been dating for a few years. If they could handle it, I realized, why couldn’t I?”

Grace leaned back into the bed with a deep breath out, wincing at the pain in her ribs, absorbing the words. Mei was right, the egoless synergy was the team’s greatest strength, and Graced craved that. She’d worked with enough Class Marked over the last five years to know how valuable and rare a team like this was.

“We stumbled upon that when we first started dating,” Penny admitted. “Both terrified of giving each other criticism, afraid of hurting feelings. Thankfully, Alice called us out on it.”

Alice laughed at the memory. “They’d both secretly begged me to ‘talk to the other.’ After the third time, I got so fed up with being the messenger, I snapped. Sat them both down together and shrieked: Use your damn words!”

The whole room laughed, easing the tension as everyone compared the Ethan and Penny in front of them to the version in the story.

“It worked,” chuckled Ethan, rubbing his neck. “We realized the feedback came from care, not malice. Since then, it’s been the default. My Class depends on that sort of honesty. Without it, none of us would be here.”

“I was skeptical,” conceded Mei. “Until I Bonded. I miss a lot of things from my old team, but we’d never had the sort of trust I found here. He didn’t dodge a single question, even when I asked about him and Alice, or how his class worked with Penny and his relationship. That.. that’s what convinced me. No hidden agenda here.

“If we can be honest about our daily essence dramatics,” teased Penny, smirking. “I think we can endure being honest about anything else.

“So, practically,” pressed Grace, cheeks flushing, “how does it work when we all need to imbue daily? I mean, just the time it takes alone…”

Ethan gave a surprised laugh, running his hand through his hair. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever feel normal talking about his class like this. “Surreal question, but fair. Essence.. It streamlines things. The Essence itself magnifies what you’re feeling. With Mei, even casual touch like hair stroking, hand holding, triggered enough Essence to.. finish quickly.”

“What we fell into was weirdly relaxing, is what he’s trying to get at,” added Mei, nostalgic. “There weren’t any romantic undertones, not really. It was like unwinding in a bath after training. At first, it was purely functional. It wasn’t until later that it grew.. deeper. It had a feeling of routine to it, after a while,” she continued. “Neither of us intended for it to happen, but it did put up a wall between us. I guess you could say it was almost platonic? While we can still fall back into our routine, we've also learned that that’s not all it has to be.”

“Most days are routine,” acknowledged Alice. “Training leaves little time or energy for grand romance. How far and how often things go, it’s your choice where you take it.”

“That’s reassuring,” murmured Grace while nodding. “I.. I still don’t think I’m okay with being romantic, but sex feels so inescapably tied to romance for me. What if I grow jealous? Or.. Or.. something else? Emotions aren’t neat, even if you _want _to logic them away.” She paused for a breath, her stomach turning as she thought back to her ex. “The fear is that I try and do as the rest of you have done, only to find out I can’t.”

The room stilled as Grace voiced her fears.

Penny broke the silence first, sitting down at the foot of Grace’s bed.. “Is there any other way to know.. Without trying? It’s the same thing I told Alice and Ethan when they first bonded. Isn’t failing better than not risking it at all?”

“Penny’s right,” echoed Alice. “My fears aren’t yours, but trying gave me.. everything.”

Grace sat quietly for a moment, her gaze drifting to the floor as she mulled over Penny’s and Alice’s words. Her fingers fidgeted with the edge of the sling around her broken arm, the weight of the decision pressing down on her.

Grace looked up, meeting his eyes, then glancing around at the others. The sincerity on their faces, Penny’s encouraging nod, Alice’s quiet smile, Mei’s calm reassurance, it all hit her harder than she expected. She let out a deep breath, her tension of indecision leaving her.

“Okay,” she said finally, her voice quieter than before but resolute. “Okay, I… I think I want to try. I’m still scared shitless that this is going to blow up in my face, that I’ll mess up the team dynamic or get caught up in feelings I can’t control. But you’re right, I can’t just sit here letting that fear stop me. Not if I want to move forward with you all. Not if I actually want to be free from my past, from my ex. I can’t use them as excuses.”

Penny grinned, giving Alice’s leg a light squeeze. “That’s the spirit. We’ve got your back, you know that. If things get weird like you said, we’ll figure it out together.”

“Yeah,” Mei added, her tone gentle. “And if it doesn’t work, or if it feels wrong, you can step back. No one’s going to hold it against you. We’ve all had to navigate this in our own way.”

Grace gave a small, nervous laugh, rubbing the back of her neck with her good hand. “Guess I’m really doing this, huh? So… what’s the next step? Do we just… I don’t know, shake on it or something?”

Ethan chuckled, shaking his head. “Not quite. We can start slow, figure out a way to Bond that you’re comfortable with. Like I said with Mei, it doesn’t have to be anything more than what you’re okay with. Touching, essence generation, we can work out a routine that feels right for you.”

“That sounds… doable,” Grace admitted, her voice steadier now. “I like the idea of keeping it practical, at least at first. No expectations, no pressure. Just… whatever gets the job done for the Bond.”

Alice nodded. “That’s how it started for me, too. Practical, even if it didn’t stay that way.”

“We’ll find the right time to Bond.” Ethan nodded.

“Why wait?” Grace questioned, her demeanor changed now that she had made a decision. “Why not right now?”

Ethan’s breath caught. “Right here?” He felt his pulse quicken as Grace caught him off guard. He’d imagined Bonding with Grace countless times. Her resolve during a fight, the way her sharpness softened when she let her guard down, the shape of her body that made every sparring match electric. But now, here? In front of the rest of the team? He swallowed, throat tightening as he looked around the room and saw agreement in the expressions around him. He’d wanted this, wanted her, for longer than he’d admit. From a childhood crush to this moment it nearly felt too good to be true.

Alice nudged his arm, snapping him out of his thoughts. “You’re overthinking,” her look said.

He knew Grace wasn’t one for half measures, he’d learned that over the last month. This was her leap, not just his. He’d asked her to jump, so how could he say no when she did? She had decided to trust him, how could he hesitate? Looking at her again, even in bed, injured, she was magnetic.

“Okay,” he managed, walking to her. He took her good hand, pulling her up to sit on the edge of the bed, legs dangling. His other hand went to her cheek, turning her face to look up at him. “This isn’t how I imagined this moment,” He had a sly grin, excitement leaking through, “but I’m ready if you are.”

Grace locked eyes with him, her chin jutting up, her good hand resting on his waist. “We’re friends. Teammates,” she said firmly, to him or herself, she wasn’t sure. “That doesn’t change, okay?”

Something in her tone pricked at him. She was steeling herself. For him? For the Bond? He felt he needed to say something, anything, but she was already pulling him closer. She shifted forward, as close as they could be.

Penny, ever perceptive, caught Ethan’s hesitation. The way he took a breath as she spoke to him, the slight tremble in his hand as he touched her. He’d been waiting so long for this, and she knew the weight of his childhood crush being rekindled over the last month. The way his gaze lingered on her when he thought nobody was looking, how they always seemed to gravitate towards each other when they hung out. But she also knew his discipline. If Grace needed this to be practical, to have it not change things, that’s what it would become. He’d bleed before he let his own wants and desires come first, always willing to be the one to accommodate.

Grace’s pulse was loud in her ears. The others were motionless, quiet. No lewd smirks, no awkward shuffling. Just waiting, supportive, patient. Banishing the remaining doubts, she took a deep breath, closing her eyes and parting her lips, inviting him to meet her halfway.

Unable to look away, unable to blink, he watched as she committed to the Bond, to the kiss. His own heart leapt and he ignored it, leaning down, her cheek cupped, their lips met.

Essence flared, and he could feel her reaction to it. Her back straightening, chest pushing forward, she pressed deeper into the kiss. His hand on her hip squeezed and he felt the threshold for the Bond broken. He reached into his mark and activated the ability, offering Grace her Bond. She accepted without hesitation and her world went white.

No amount of warning could have been enough to prepare her for the Bond. The surge of Essence from the kiss paled in comparison to the feeling of Essence flooding every inch of her, all at once. She tensed, breaking the kiss, her hand on his waistband clenched, pulling him tight to her. She pressed her forehead against his chest as she climaxed, his hand still holding her head softly against him. The feeling of the Essence seeming to rebound within her, driving the peaks of her orgasm higher and higher.

She was quiet as she came, nothing more than the sound of her breathing growing heavy to let the others know what had happened. Ethan continued to hold her there while she recovered.

Alice watched as he held her, wondering if that was what she looked like when they Bonded. A small spike of envy found its way forward, wishing she could experience that moment again, only to be smothered by the feelings of empathic joy as she watched Grace recover. She that quiet hope fulfilled, knowing that with the bond, Grace wasn’t going to disappear on them again.

Mei’s lips curved into a warm smile, genuine happiness written on her face as she watched Ethan and Grace. She took a half-step forward in joy, wanting to be there for Grace in the first moments after the Bond, the same way Ethan had been for her.

Penny bit her lip as she watched Grace tremble and stiffen. The moment the Bond was accepted was clear as day, and she felt an odd sort of pride well up in her. Watching Ethan finalize the last Bond on their team, knowing it was Grace, had a feeling of rightness in it. There was no jealousy, no insecurity, only warmth.

Ethan felt as Grace’s clenched fist loosened and her breathing returned to normal. Still holding her, he channeled his own Essence pool and began to heal. He saw the break in her arm, the splintered bone. Her ribs had fractures running through them, the skin covering them a dark blue-black. A myriad other cuts, scrapes, bruises and other injuries were spotted all over her body.

At first, Grace didn’t understand what was happening, it was similar to that feeling at the back of your neck when someone is watching you. It was quickly followed by a warmth and tingling sensation that spread through her, starting from where Ethan’s hand still held her in the crook of her neck. When it reached her broken arm, she gasped. A deep pressure bloomed in the broken bone and she could feel the bones aligning, knitting, fusing back together as if they had never been apart.

Staggered gasps were all she could manage as her ribs were next… the ones that had made every breath she’d taken a punishment, the Essence slid over them and dissolved the pain she’d been bracing against for hours, each breath going from pain to.. Nothing, a complete lack of pain. She could feel as the bruises faded, the sensation of coolness all that remained as the Essence continued on, searching for further wounds.

The Essence continued deeper, suffusing across all of her. The aches she’d long accepted as part of training, part of life, began to fade. The constant background throb in her shoulder, the one she’d injured three years ago, evaporated. The pop in her left hip every time she moved wrong, gone. The crooked tip of her pinky, torn from a bad punch, straightened. That, more than anything, broke her composure.

An incredulous laugh escaped her, eyes wet with tears she stubbornly blinked away. A flex of her shoulders, testing and expecting to find the familiar pain. Relief hit her, equal parts joy and disbelief. She took a hesitant deep breath, sending shivers down her spine in relief at the absence of pain, letting the breath out in a shaking exhale, eyes wide.

“I…” Her voice cracked.” I didn’t know it could feel like this.”

She pulled away from Ethan, looking up and meeting his eyes. He had an expectant smile, knowing what she had felt and knowing just how free of pain she was. Every doubt she still held was banished as she wrapped her arms around him, standing up as she pulled him into a hug.

Grace moved to Alice next, quickly followed by Penny and Mei, squeezing each of them tight. The Bonding, the healing, the welcome from all of them. It was enough to overwhelm Grace and she laughed as happy tears rolled down her cheeks. Disbelief was vanquished from her mind as she fully embraced becoming a part of a team she could have only dreamt about months before.

“Grace?” A voice called from the doorway.

Everything went still, as if Grace’s body was trying to make sense of what she had just heard. Her chest felt like it had suddenly dropped inward, as if the air had been pulled out before she had time to brace. A tight, hollow ache. Part shock, part dread. Her heartbeat stumbled, pounding harder out of alarm.

That voice.. She looked to the doorway, seeing him standing there, bouquet of flowers in hand.

Her expression turned hard, and her voice matched it. “You need to leave. Now.”