A Lonely Leaf

“Squirtle, I’ve a feeling we’re not in Kanto anymore.”

Squirtle stared at her as if to say: Bitch, if you don’t cut the outdated references, I’ll water gun you.

Leaf grinned. “What’s the matter, can’t stand the sight of a strong young woman?”

It seemed a good idea at first, looking for Pokémon in a place designed for animals, but now that she saw it, she had to admit no one in their right mind would willingly hang out in this horror movie.

“Ah well,” Leaf said. “Let’s just get back to the restaurant, I guess.”

They kept walking, Squirtle waddling on with a serious look on his face that made Leaf laugh.

“Cheer up, Squirt! I know we’re in danger and all, but—“

She stopped in her tracks when she heard the warbling of the purple monsters. They’d found them.

“Okay, Squirt. Get ready.”

The dark goo seemed to come from everywhere, forming the obscene shapes she’d not yet gotten used to.

“Remember, keep ‘em at a distance at first. You don’t want to be grabbed. Use water gun to soak ‘em, and freeze their shit with ice beam. Then you can destroy them with iron tail.”

She gave Squirtle some more pointers during the battle, but mostly, the strategy worked perfectly. After some excellent finishes, the things retreated.

“Great job, Squi—“

A hand grabbed her shoulder. She swung around, and kicked her assailant straight in the balls. The guy—about her age and clearly not one of the creatures—bent over and dropped to the floor.

“I—“ he gasped, “Sorry.”

“Oh shit, dude! Thought you were one of them. You okay?”

“Yuh— yeah.”

“You shouldn’t sneak up on girls like that, dude. It’s bad karma.”

“I noticed.”

“Come on, I know a safe place.”

“So what you doing here, Lucas?” Leaf sat down in one of the booths of the restaurant, and threw her new friend a beer from the kitchen. Squirtle stood guard at the door, looking as grumpy as ever.

“Just trying to survive whatever’s going on.”

“Same. How’s the dick?”

Lucas turned red. “What?”

“I feel bad, can’t imagine getting kicked in the nuts feels much better.”

“It’s okay.”

“You sure? Want me to check?”

He turned even redder now. Geez, this guy was serious. She couldn’t help messing with him.

“What do you mean?” he stammered.

“Let me have a look, make sure everything is okay.”

“I’m not sure if—“

“Give it a kiss to make it feel better.”

“I—“

“I’m joking, you doofus. Why are you so serious?”

He looked rather embarrassed. Leaf stared at him. Poor guy, he probably lost some people too.

“Anyway,” she said, changing the subject. “I got a strategy. That cute little guy by the door is my Pokémon.”

“Your what?”

“My pocket monster. I catch them, train ‘em to fight. Now, I saw a really strong one flying this way earlier, and if I find it, we’re set.”

“We?”

“Yeah, bud. You’re the first human I’ve seen in days. Besides, you got your own pocket monster, right?”

Lucas looked confused. “What do you— oh,” he said, noticing her grin.

They sat talking for a while, drinking their zoo-restaurant beers. He was rather cute, in a reserved, innocent kind of way.

“It’s getting dark. We better make ourselves comfortable,” she said, throwing her bottle across the room into a trash can. “Come, I made a little bedroom in a storage closet.”

A bit of awkward maneuvering later, they were lying side by side in the dark on her bed made out of the upholstery of some destroyed booths.

“Sorry about earlier,” she said. “I tend to be a bit…“

“Annoying?” Lucas suggested.

She laughed and punched what she thought was his shoulder. “Was that a joke?”

“Maybe.”

She lied there, staring at the darkness for a moment.

“How many have you lost?” She asked, dreading the answer.

“Too many. You?”

“Same.”

She swallowed, trying to push away the memories.

“Lucas?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you hold me for a while?”