1st Round Announcement: Hotel Hotties Pizza Delivery

Loverboo paced the stage, coaching the few girls here and there who were still acting so transformed, fitting into their new roles, that they couldn't listen to the rules of the contest effectively until they got to a suitable state. "Alright, alright. Very silly, very sexy new girls, yes yes, we love it. But we must calm ourselves for just a moment to listen to the rules of the first contest, or we aren't going to get very many VP, now are we?" the cupid-dressed rabbit doll insisted, raising its voice over the others. "Focus, ladies, focus! Eyes up once again. I'm going to explain the first contest. It's a favorite of mine I'm bringing back from a previous season I attended, during my own honeymoon phase as a host."

A fancy video package began to play out on screen, featuring big-breasted women in somewhat skimpy, vaguely copyright-infringing pizza delivery outfits, like something out of a low-budget pornography.

Round 1: Hotel Hotties Pizza Delivery

Every guy loves two things: hot girls and hot pizza! These go particularly well together in an erotica setting such as ours, like cheese and pepperoni atop a a fresh pie. Our first contest is themed around the classic, a smoking sexy pizza delivery girl answering a lucky guy's door-- or a pair of them, since this is a team contest, after all. Your goal is the same as every service industry worker's. You want to secure a big, big tip. Directly, your tips will translate directly to BP, but moreover, the contest's winners will be the ones who secure the biggest tips from their delivery customers.

This contest has two phases: the Run-Up and the Service.

The Run-Up is just what it sounds like. You need to reach the target as soon as possible! There are four customers, to be divided between each of the contestant factions, each situated in the same alternate version of the Harem Hotel that you will be transported to, with no specific customer assigned to any specific group-- it's first come, first served. Your mission, as pizza delivery girls, is to deliver them hot-out-the-oven pizza while it's still hot.

However, you're not just trying to reach them quickly for the sake of good service. You'll also find that certain customers are more desirable than others. Below is a list of them:

1) Room 301, the executive suite, where a wealthy talent broker by the name of Bill Freeman is waiting. Old Bill is a very eager recipient of the Master contract in an alternate Harem Hotel season, just as handsy with the room service as he is with the girls assigned to his harem. He's likely to be a very big tipper if persuaded the right way. If you're having a hard time identifying him, he's the big one with the hairpiece. I'd recommend you don't mention any prior knowledge of the hairpiece and for God's sake, don't touch it. Also, as a forewarning, I don't think he's terribly interested in the pizza.

2) Room 235, where one of Bill's coworkers, Quincy Cline, is waiting. Quincy is a sweetheart, not like Bill, and he probably thinks he's just getting a pizza, bless him. One of his friends ordered him Hotel Hotties as a sort of a prank. That said, he's into women, even if he's nicer to them, and he has deep pockets. Oh, there is just one catch though... He's completely blind. Are you wondering why he's here with Bill in the first place? Bill had him brought here as part of one of the contests and... it's complicated. Don't worry about it.

3) Room 240, at the end of the hall, where another of Bill's coworkers, Angela Topps, is waiting. She's actually a contestant on the show, but she's still allowed to order Hotel Hotties pizza if she wants it. You see, Angela very much prefers the company of women and wants one last hurrah before Bill inevitably flips her. She'll probably be a good tipper as well, although she doesn't have the same deep pockets as the others. There's a vague sense of desperation about her that's common among most early contestants, frankly. Show her a good time for her last night of lesbianism, won't you?

4) Room 201, at the opposite end of the hall, where a hotel employee party is taking place. They've actually ordered you just for the pizza and aren't looking for any special service. They might not even leave a tip! Diffusion of responsibility and all that, right? Spoiler: this one is the equivalent of failing to catch a seat playing Duck-Duck Goose.

You'll understand that some rooms are more desirable than others for the sake of winning the contest. Please keep in mind: only one team gets each room, and whoever gets their first, it's yours. No fighting between teams after the fact.

As for part two, the Service, you probably understand where this is going. Do whatever you can to secure a big tip. There are almost no rules as to how you go about securing that tip, except that you may not harm anyone at the other hotel and whatever you do with them, it has to stay inside of the room. I won't have you trying to take them out of the hotel or anything silly like that. Oh, one more rule: you cannot straight up just steal their money, nor can you threaten them for it. They have to give it to you.

Anything that has monetary value in their world and is given to you as payment for services will be exchanged for BP once all contestants have made their return. The stakes for this contest, besides the BP you earn from tips, are as follows. You'll see that, if you should fail to truly apply yourself to this contest, you can expect some extra Resonium to boost your performance going forward.

1st place: 15 VP each awarded

2nd place: 5 VP each awarded

3rd place: 0 VP each awarded, + 1 A rank resonium for each contestant

4th place: -5 VP each awarded, +2 A rank resonium for each contestant

One more thing: you can use the Loverboo Catalogue in your phone to place advance orders for tools and tricks that may help you in tomorrow's contests. There's like a few other fun goodies as well. Try to strategize with your partner before the competition and come up with a game plan to beat the others. Leverage your bodies, brains, and wealth to become the queen of the fast food service industry!

Loverboo, looking pleased with itself, dismissed the monitor and returned it to a static, scrolling heart pattern, occasionally interrupted by a virtual Bangboo shooting an arrow. "Whoever put that package together deserves a big round of applause from the whole theater, I say!" she congratulated herself.

When only the audience actually joined in, ineffectually patting their paws together, the host sighed. "Qingyi, give me a round of applause."

The android snapped a salute, then began doing as requested. As she did, she turned her head to the game's Master with a dubious frown on her face. "Wise, does it strike you that Bangboos are overly prone to narcissism?"

"They tend to act like children, and children do have a narcissistic view point... but as a reminder, this one isn't actually a Bangboo. It's just being remote controlled by the host."

"I see. Our host is like a narcissistic child, I agree."

Rina turned to Ellen with a smile, placing one hand upon the other girl's shoulder. "Did you hear that, Miss Ellen? Service! Also, a change of clothes, I wager, which is a bonus for yours truly! This is sounding like just our ticket. We won't be beaten when it comes to service, will we?" she giggled, wearing a pleasant smile and massaging the smaller girl's shoulder enthusiastically.

"Yeah huh. Just remember that if I do like... anything tough, I'm going to either need to eat two dozen donuts or do something dirty with Wise. And I think the donuts would only work a few times before I'd have to finally sleep, sooo..." the other girl mused. She blinked a couple of times. "I can already feel my energy leaving..."

"Oh no... Chin up, Miss Ellen!"

Nicole, with her top now back into place and seeming as though she wasn't even slightly embarrassed about her previous behavior, threw one arm around Anby and pulled her in close for a new scheme. "Sounds like we get to do a little shopping! My fav. Let's pull up those catalogues and start investing, he he!"

Anby lowered her eyebrows. It was strange-- Nicole still seemed to be acting like herself in some ways, but the fact that she wasn't even slightly concerned about performing for a bunch of horndogs to rake in tips was definitely out of character. Plus, she had her own relationship with Wise to think about... how was "her boyfriend" going to react, seeing her play around with other guys?

"Pizza delivery? Feels like I've been demoted. I guess if we get there really fast, we'll get a big tip, and that's that?" Koleda asked Grace, speaking idly with a lack of concern.

"Sweetpea, you do understand that getting there fast is only half the contest, don't you? Once we're there we have to 'work' for the tips," Grace questioned, keeping her voice low.

"Huh? What does a pizza delivery girl do after delivering the pizza? She gets the tip, then, right?"

Grace leaned in closer, whispering the fine details into her increasingly red-faced boss's ear.

"We've got the ultimate weapon. Nobody is going to be able to resist you out of uniform. For that matter, dressed as a pizza girl? What a fantasy," Qingyi coached her partner, now literally offering the lap pillow service she'd mentioned earlier. Ordinarily, Zhu Yuan would be way too proud to take it, but with her personality switch, she seemed open to being babied. "Let's just remember though: our goal isn't to get anyone 'eliminated.' In fact, if we think strategically, we might be able to keep everyone in the game, besides helping each other."

"You're right, Qingyi. I may be... different," Zhu Yuan murmured, still grappling with that vague change in her own personality, "but I'm still a police officer. I still have a duty!"

Wise rubbed his hands together, not with excitement, but with an awkward wringing. He hoped the girls were going to keep their excellent, tip-worthy service outside of the realm of hardcore pornography. All of his effort to play the part of a gentleman and keep his hands off the increasingly eager girls wouldn't do much if they were focusing on other guys instead for this contest.

"Ahem! I can see you girls are all eager. Splendid! However, there is one more thing we've yet to discuss," the Bangboo on stage interrupted the various whispers on stage. "Namely: you will all perform better if we take today for a little R&R. Rest up today, put your plans together with your partners, enjoy our food and amenities, and have a nice sleep. Then we'll start bright and early in the morning, putting those cute booties of yours to work."

"Hey, Loverboo. Isn't it weird that they're serving another Harem Hotel? And that you know so much about it? Are you... hosting two games at once?" Wise asked, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

"That is..." the Loverboo answered, wearing a cryptic, blank expression for just a moment, before smiling with its heart eyes squeezed into crescents. "None of your business, darling! I will say, this is a big enterprise and we've got a lot of wheels in motion. However, rest assured, New Eridu Edition is my baby. You and the audience are going to, in the end, have a very good time."

For the remainder of the day, things almost felt normal. Wise found that it wasn't a lot different than spending time with the girls around the city back at home. They could have meals together-- anything they wanted, catch a movie marathon, and head back to their rooms to rest peacefully. They could hit the beach, although Wise decided to abstain from that. He could only imagine the number of wardrobe malfunctions he'd see if he got them all in swimsuits.

After a while, no one really cared that Rina was stuck in her underwear or that Anby was a little confused about her exact relationship with Wise or that Grace was unnecessarily interested in the state of his erection. It felt normal.

Wise was almost relaxed as he headed up to his room, but he had to make a pit-stop first. He felt like he'd be more comfortable using one of the men's public bathrooms on floor 2 than he would using that giant bathroom in his private suite, so he stopped there. As soon as he sat on the toilet, his phone began to buzz.

>"Master?"

The message had no listed sender. Was it from one of the contestants. They'd all been instructed to call him Master, but he hadn't expected them to actually do that. "Who is this?" he answered, frowning down at his phone.

>"My apologies. Even an AI can be forgetful. There are an unusual number of women who call you Master."

>"This is Fairy, your advanced AI companion. I was waiting for a moment of low viewership with no host to contact you."

>"Your private toilet time seems to meet that criteria."

"You've... been here this whole time?!" Wise asked, clutching his phone tightly in disbelief.

>"A part of me, at least, has been **** here and remains inside of your phone. You may think of me as a piece of the original Fairy."

>"Unfortunately, while I am still this dimension's most advanced AI, my functionality is limited. The so-called 'alien technology' is actually rather simple."

>"I have explored every corner of the HOTEL_WIFI network. Very little is actually connected to this network."

>"Suggestion: Harem Hotel is supposedly operating in multiple locations. Our host is watching two games at once. They must be connected by some sort of network."

>"If you can upload me to that linked network, perhaps through some sort of terminal, I may be able to assist further in constructing a valid escape plan."

>"If you actually want to escape, that is. Far be it from me to deprive you of your all-expenses-paid vacation."

>"My operation here consumes almost no battery power with zero contribution to your home electricity bill, so there are certain advantages."

Wise nodded, then began to put up his phone. He paused, then brought it back out. "Thanks, Fairy. I'm glad you're here."

After finishing up in the restroom, Wise rinsed his hands and headed up to the bedroom. He'd nearly forgotten about the competition to come in the morning. His mind was occupied with trying to hatch a scheme... He needed a way to get Loverboo distracted, find a terminal linked into the network between hotels, which must surely have greater administrative access, take hold of that access, and use it to bring them all home.

But did such an access point really exist?

While he was still thinking about it, he walked absent-minded into his bedroom. Having mostly forgotten the contest, he'd forgotten its important rules. Specifically, it had slipped his mind that he wouldn't be alone in his bedroom tonight...