"It's your choice"

You don't hear anything for a few minutes, and Alice replies, "I'll text later".

Your heart drops like a rock into your stomach. This is it. Alice might actually have sex with another man, and you agreed to it. Your head starts spinning, and for a moment you feel like you might throw up, and you lay down on the cold, comforting bathroom floor to try to collect yourself. You feel the weight of sensory overload, unsure of what to think or how to act, and all that anchors you is the unrelenting throbbing and leaking between your legs.

You try to push the thoughts of what Alice might be doing right now out of your mind. You rationalize; maybe she won't go through with it. Maybe she'll have second thoughts. Maybe she'll stop herself, or just leave it at foreplay for now.

Or maybe she won't. Not knowing is the worst part.

You try to **** the thoughts from your mind and get on with your evening. But no matter how hard you try, your mind keeps going back to Alice and wondering what she's doing right now. You try to **** yourself to eat by picking away at vegetables, but realize you have no appetite nor are likely to have one tonight. Those uncomfortable thoughts -- what she's doing, in what positions and with what body parts -- just keep coming back.

You keep your phone by you at all times, waiting for the promised text. And you realize, the longer you go without hearing from her, the more certain it is something is going on between her and this other man. You end up pacing through the apartment with the television on for background noise, and after an hour of no word from Alice, there's only one conclusion: she's actually having sex with this other man.

The cold sweats and wooziness return. You move from laying in the bedroom, to laying on the couch, waiting for word. You pick up your phone, about to text Alice, and realize nothing you can say might change what is happening right now. You put the phone down, and resolve to just watch and wait.

One hour turns to two, and two into three.

Finally, you hear the phone vibrate and see the screen light up. You grab the phone, and check it. It's Alice.

"I'm on my way home," the text reads.

Too excited and nervous to wait, you reply, "what happened? Did you go through with it?"

A moment later, you see a text. "I'll tell you when I get home".

All you can do is wait. Eventually...