"Have You Ever Had Your Bare Bottom Displayed On National TV ?"

Debbi peered through the gap in her bedroom curtains and saw the press till camped out. While she waited for Lawrence to arrive she switched on breakfast TV for some distraction. They were doing their daily review of the papers. "And the Sun are leading on the bimbo WAG who stole Roddy's heart" the female anchor said sneeringly as the screen was filled by a facsimile of the front page, including the photo of Debbi's bare bum. Millions of people were seeing her bare bum !

"I suppose it could be argued that is the most important news of the day ?" the male anchor pondered. "It is to Sun readers, especially if there's a bare bottom involved" his female counterpart replied condescendingly. The banter continued back and forth. "Have you ever had your bare bottom displayed on national TV ?" the male of the team asked flirtatiously. "I most certainly have not. And I can assure you that I never will" his female sparring partner answered haughtily as the screen once more displayed Debbi on the Sun's front page. "Still, I'm sure it's no hardship to this little gold digger as long as she gets her five minutes of fame" she concluded cattily.

Debbi raged helplessly but was brought back to the present moment by persistent ringing on her doorbell. Looking through the spy hole, she saw a man and a woman she did not recognise.

"Who is it ?"

"Daily Mail" came the answer. "We'd just like a quick interview. Maybe a few pictures ?"

"No, clear off"

"It'll be much easier if you talk to us. We'll only make something up otherwise !"

"Bugger off !"

There was laughter from the other side of the door. "Oh well, we've got all day" the voice said. The fuming Debbi had just sat down when the doorbell rang again. "I told you to fuck off" she screamed. "Calm down sweet pea, it's me." Debbi flung open the door in relief. "Oh Lawrence, I'm so glad to see you." Debbi had forgotten that she was only dressed in a t-shirt and knickers. The swarm of cameras clicked again. "Bastards" yelled Debbi, stamping her feet and giving more photo opportunities as her t-shirt rode up ! "Take it easy precious, it's OK. Come inside and we'll sort it all out" Lawrence said soothingly.

Debbi's mood was a mixture of dismay and righteous anger. "They said they'd make things up if I didn't talk to them."

"That's the tabloids for you. Don't worry. I've contacted Harry Mason and he's making initial calls to all the editors before he comes over here."

"Who's he ?"

"Haven't you seen him on TV ? Top PR guy to all the celebs. He'll know the best way to handle this."

Debbi's phone rang. It was her boss Jeff. Lawrence could not help but smile at the one sided conversation he heard.

"I've never even met the guy"

"I was just doing a favour for a friend"

"What I do in my own time's my own business"

"Of course I won't mention the company"

"How am I supposed to get you his bloody autograph ?!"