Hard As A Rock

Your Red Viper with tinted windows speeds down Hummer Ave. In the immaculate high performance car with you are two of your closest drinking buddies. You had not intended to come to this part of town earlier tonight, but you and your friends had got to talking about how all the best sexual experiences you’d ever had were always with older women, rather than naïve waifs with no idea what to do with your hard meat. Talking yourselves into a lustful frenzy, you knew there was only one place you wanting to spend the evening; The Cougar Bar! Originally called that due to the large paintings of said feline on its walls, it had become known as the place for mature assertive women to come and sip their drinks and hunt for men. Whether the ‘Cougars’ had started frequenting the establishment due to its name or through pure chance you didn’t know, and frankly, as long as they kept returning there you didn’t care either way!

Bringing your car to a gentle stop, you wind down your window and take off your shades. "Here we are guys, The Cougar Bar!" you say, turning to smile wolfishly at your mates. "Let’s just hope it hasn‘t changed to the Kitten Bar..."

"Hell yeah!" Says Vince, your buddy that still has one foot in his punk teenage years, what with dyed green hair and all.

"No stealin' my babes." Chips in Ernest ‘Lucky’ Jr.

"Babes! Pfft, if anything, the lady you pick is the one we all know to avoid more like!" You say.

You look out the window; some hot babes are walking along the front. A chick in a red !TIGHT! dress passes by, stopping out the front for a smoke. As she stands there lighting up, you get a chance to grade her, and the grade is A+! She’s all by herself so it would be easy to strike up a conversation with her and not have to worry about friends of hers trying to butt you out, but you do have Vince and Ernest with you and they probably don’t want to stand around outside while you try to score early.

As you all hop out of the car you wonder, walk straight inside or try to start a conversation with the cougar in red?