Greek War

Some people will tell you the best way to get through college is to sell your body, in one way or another, but you never really subscribed to that theory. You thought that there was more money elsewhere, in a career that won't tarnish you if want a glamorous career, but you were wrong. Sex is the best seller in today's society, there is no denying that, but the second best seller is weapons' dealer, proving society can be boiled down to pain or pleasure responses. But you're not one of those nuts who sells guns and knives, fuck no. You don't sell weapons that can kill people and start the next world war, you sell weapons that and humiliate others. Which has an interesting story behind it.

Your roommate, Kevin, pledged one of the fraternities, you can't remember which, and his was at war with another one, still can't remember which (at this point, all the Greek chapters on campus blended together in your mind so can't really remember who hates who and which sorority is the sister to which fraternity), and Kevin's needed to get the other fraternity fast and hard. You took a look around your room and recalled some things you heard on the grape vine, and came up with a beautiful plan, but wanted thirty dollars for it. You got half up front and were promised the other half when they finished and would only receive all if they approved of what happened. You gave the fraternity some chemicals from your chemistry set and told them to add the chemicals to the body washes they use before their sister sorority threw that big party. As a result, after the next time they showered, they reeked of skunk and rotten eggs for a month, and everyday took three showers to scrub out the smell, never figuring out the smell came from the body washes. Due to the smell, the sorority uninvited them, leaving the horny fraternity to use their hands on the big night they all felt certain they would score any girl at the party. Kevin's frat was so impressed they threw you an extra twenty just because of how funny it was that they never even tried a different wash until the tampered stuff ran out.

Needless to say, word spreads fast and you quickly became a dealer of humiliation, favoring whoever makes the better offer. You occasionally make a deal with sports teams, minor clubs, and students whose motives weren't even rooted in an organization, but the fraternities and sororities are your best customers. Through these dealings, you have earned enough money to secure your life until your forty, assuming your bank doesn't declare bankruptcy, and have gotten all forms of sex from sorority girls, cheerleaders, and sisters of Greek members. And to show everyone your neutral, you never commit the pranks, you only plan them and give out the supplies, and if someone ever buys pays for secrecy and someone offers more to break that secrecy, you take the more money, after raising the amount a bit, and give a 100% refund to the person who paid for secrecy.

This year, it's your sophomore year, and you're prepared to dish out the ultimate in tortures. Your grades earned you almost unrestricted use of the campus lab, which kicks the shit out of your childish chemistry set, as long as you're willing to pay for the chemicals you use and equipment you break. Naturally, your rates are higher this year, but hey, this not only gets you laid, it also shows you have the most creativity on this campus. You hold the monopoly and the students are often asking for a plan to a plan you created. This is a self perpetuating career that won't end as long as you stay original.