Monica's Feeling a Little Catty

"Don't worry, ladies, there's a bunch of us and only two guys playing," says Monica as the spinner rotates. "I'm sure one of us will come out on top." The dial slows down to stop on 1.

"Not if you keep making spins like that," groans Rachel. She reaches up and feels the metal collar around her neck. "It's not like we can leave anyway, with all the exits magically bricked up."

Monica picks up a green card and reads, "You've got a pussy, and you're dressed like one, too/Let's make that costume a part of you." With that, a white flash surrounds her briefly. "What? What?" she asks -- it's hard for her to see what's happening, but the rest of the group can see her human ears shrinking to nothingness while the cat ears on the top of her head suddenly look more realistic as the plastic headband they were attached to disappears. A small silver hoop earring appears in each one. Her long black tail, formerly an immobile prop pinned to the back of her teddy, starts twitching back and forth. Since you're next to her, you happen to be looking at her eyes and notice that the shape of her pupils changes, from round to little slits. And what Monica does see is the final change, her fingernails growing longer, over an inch, and tapering nearly to a point at the tip, looking very much like talons -- or claws.

"Oh, my God, she's, like, half cat," says someone.

"What? I --" Monica stops and tilts her head. Her tail puffs up a bit. Everyone's silent for a minute, but then Monica relaxes and explains, "Sorry, thought I heard a dog." She puts a hand to her mouth and starts licking the base of her thumb, then moves her hand to her hair and runs over it with the wet part. She notices everyone is still watching her and says, "Well, come on, someone go. You don't want your collars to zap you again, I'm sure." At the mention of "collars," you notice that Monica's now looks leather and not metal, although it does have a metal tag attached; it's engraved "MONICA - PROPERTY OF CHANDLER BING" with a phone number.

"Fine, I'll go," says the woman in a genie costume. She spins and gets to take a yellow card, which she reads. "Since a genie is how you're dressed/You'll now grant any man's request." A flash surrounds her, but she doesn't look any different. She shrugs.

The maid: "You clean up well, but here's a gripe/You should talk like a stereotype." The flash only happens around her throat, and when she opens her mouth, the words come out in a fake-sounding French accent: "What has happened? What is zis? What is wrong with moi's voice? Oh, no! I am talking like in ze bad movie!"

The schoolgirl: "The costume in which you're being seen/Would make more sense at age 18." The flash surrounds her whole body, and the changes are subtle, but it looks as if she's had about 20 years knocked off. She seems happy, saying, "Wow, I don't think I looked this good the first time around!"

The devil gets a red card and reads, "Although your growth might make you moan/Supergirl shouldn't feel alone." Within a few seconds, her skin-tight red leotard is bulging in the front as much as Phoebe's costume is.

The witch: "You're a little wicked, true/So now for the appropriate hue." The flash surrounds her, and her skin quickly changes to the green color seen in "The Wizard of Oz" as, more subtly, her hair changes to a jet black. She hasn't changed otherwise, and you find yourself thinking she looks kinda hot like that.

With that, Rachel's the only female who hasn't taken her turn yet, but she's watching Ross and Chandler locked in their arm-wrestling battle at the kitchen table. She yells at them, "Have you two even noticed what's going on in the rest of the apartment?"

Ross is still starting intensely at Chandler. "Um, we're a little busy here."

"Then you might as well not even be here!" says Rachel. She turns to Gunther hoping for the easy validation and asks, "Don't you agree?"

Gunther quickly chimes in with, "Yeah! I wish they weren't even here."

At that, the genie says, "Your wish is my command." She gestures towards Ross and Chandler, who both flash and then disappear. She puts her hand to her mouth. "Oh, my God! What did I just do?"

Gunter looks stunned. There's some conversation in the room, but Monica pipes up with "Hey, isn't it Rachel's turn?" You look at her and are startled to see that she's sitting on the floor, one leg up in the air, leaning way over and licking her inner thigh --looks like she's become a lot more flexible now that she's part cat. And the tag on her collar now reads "PROPERTY OF JOEY TRIBBIANI." You really, really hope you or Gunther wins this game.