Still more naked nightmares

Katie Rosenbaum, 1998, felt pretty pleased with herself as she walked out into the spotlight. The host of the award show was a handsome blonde man in a sparkly blue suit whose teeth gleamed as he smiled at her, welcoming her onto the stage.

"Now, Katie," he said. "I'm sure you've guessed why you've been invited tonight."

"Not really," said Katie, smoothing down her little black dress, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious. She knew the show was going out live across the entire world. The theatre was packed with thousands of people, including all her friends, plus her thesis adviser, ten favourite scientists and high school crush. "Is it my ground-breaking work in the field of atomic chemistry?"

"No, it's not that."

"Then it must be all the vital contributions I made to particle physics. I worked really hard on that!"

"I'm sure you did, Katie," said the host, smirking and tipping the crowd a wink. It really was a big crowd. Katie could see, in the front row, the entire cheerleading team from her old high school, dressed to kill and watching her expectantly. She frowned, trying to repress a few memories. "But tonight we're celebrating something else. Why don't you stand right over here?"

"Uh, okay," said Katie, a little nervous, taking centre stage. She felt the host's hand brush the back of her dress, fixing something up for her, probably. At the sides of the stage she could see the black lenses of television cameras, focused on her. "What is it?"

"Well, we've done the math, Katie, and we've realised something very special about you. There's no denying it."

"What?"

"You are one hundred percent, officially, scientifically, according to the latest research," the host said, eyes gleaming, "the biggest nerd of all time. Hit it, boys."

Katie heard the whistle of rope as a counterweight was released backstage, and the shuffle of silk. The hook that the host had attached to the back of her dress was yanked sharply into the air, taking the dress with it.

"EEEEEK!"

The whole theatre burst into laughter and applause as a blushing and very naked Katie jumped for her dress, now suspended just out of reach of her fingertips. Her small breasts bounced, her pert little bottom wiggled as she squirmed in the spotlight. The cheerleaders laughed longest and loudest of all.