I think so.

"Oh, I get it. The modifier makes you pretend to be real. Ok, my human girlfriend. Thank you for coming to a people restaurant with me."

"I'm not a fucking golem!" A few nearby diners glanced at them. "Why do you keep saying that?"

Instead of responding, Andrew dug the red script out of his pocket and flashed it at her. She blinked, then burst into laughter.

"Oh my God, dude, that was fucking crazy!" she said. "I couldn't- I couldn't- it's like, you know when something gets stuck in the back of your mouth and no matter how much you swallow it won't go down? It was like that with my fundamental identity."

Andrew stared. "What?"

"I couldn't know I was a golem. Oh, right! The script! Wow, that... I think the golem part is still waking up. So yeah, these scripts are based on Chambers' script technique for hardwiring golem thought patterns."

"What?" He was aghast. "Maria! We've only had those a week! They drove Pat insane!"

"You'd be surprised at what a team of the best yetzirologists in the world can do in a week," she said. Now she reached her hand out to hold his again. He almost retracted his, then let his fingers intertwine with hers. "Madison helped me with this. They fast-tracked the R&D. Chambers' initial insight was revolutionary but his follow-through was sloppy. These are clean - almost no chance of a ****/**** spree."

*Almost?" he cried.

She cleared her throat. "Bad joke. Anyway, you've got these handy on/off switches. You don't like the girlfriend experience, flash the red one and we're back where we started."

"Girlfriend experience? That's what this is about?"

"Yeah. A real, honest-to-God girlfriend. Normal."

"You're already indistinguishable from a human," he objected, motioning to the waiter for another glass of wine.

"A twenty three year old human who has never brushed her teeth or bought a tampon or-"

"Wait, it makes you menstruate?" he asked.

"Yeah. And have BO. A golem obeys the script with body and mind. If the script tells me to sweat, I sweat. I guess I should find a good hairdresser."

"Can't I just tell you to act more human?" he asked. "Why the script?"

"It prevents me from being a golem in any way. For example, suppose we were in public and I was supposed to pass as human. If you were trapped in a housefire and I needed to reveal my nature to lift a heavy beam off of you, I would."

Andrew was staring to understand. "But with this script, you wouldn't."

The waiter interrupted them with their dessert. A shared piece of chocolate cheesecake. When he had gone, Maria immediately took a bite.

"I would sure as hell try," she said after swallowing. "I'd come to your rescue and pull with all my strength. I might even fuck up my back, but if I could get it off of you in time it'd be worth it."

"You'd have back problems?" Andrew asked. The waiter stopped to refill his wine.

"That's the fun part. You can take it off and ask me to cure it. The scripts are structured so that I can change almost anything about human Maria, except for the human part. For example, I suggest having her forget that whole previous conversation."

"How does this whole thing work?"

She beamed. "I knew you were gonna ask! I brainstormed a lot and I think I've got a couple of great metaphors. Ok, imagine my brain is a parking lot. Spaces are potential thought patterns, and cars come and go, activating those thought patterns. This was if someone put up traffic cones around the 'I am a golem' area."

"What the hell are you talking about?" he asked.

"Hmm, that one didn't work. Would help to tell you each space is ℵ₀-dimensional?"

"Nevermind. Why would I want this? You think I wished you got periods?" he asked. The cheesecake was more than halfway gone and he hadn't picked up his fork. She took another large bite before answering.

"Because you get tired of the golem thing," she said. "Put it this way: normally, I would pay careful attention to how you're eating and calculate exactly how much to eat. If you told me to act like a human, I would make a decision based on how much I'd eaten that day. If you gave me that script, I might be feeling bloated after the pasta and hang back on purpose."

"Or you might..." Andrew said woozily, as she pushed a perfect golf ball-sized bite of cheesecake towards him.

"Feel like eating it most of myself. You know, selfishness. Remember that?"

"And if things happen to go south..."

She grinned. "You get sick of crampy, tired Maria hogging the bathroom in the morning, you flash that script. We can also set up a few code phrases. Those are usually call-and-response, ordinary phrases like 'Have you heard that new song, Golem Girl?' and then you have to sing some lyrics or something."

"I have to sing?" he asked incredulously. The wine was starting to go to his head. He noticed she was signing the check.

"You are so sweet," he blurted out before she could reply. "You did all this for me, and I haven't even thanked you yet."

She grinned and patted his arm, then helped him to his feet. "You can try it out for real tomorrow. I think tonight I'll need a superhuman ability to tolerate your drunk ass. Human Maria would probably call an Uber for you and find her own way home. Oh, and- oof, the superhuman strength is a plus too.

They were outside, and she was... carrying him? He giggled a little and burped up a little carbonara. They were outside now and Maria was depositing him in the passenger seat of his cheap sedan. He closed one eye and watched her walk around the front of the car.

"You are the best," he slurred, reaching to touch her cheek. Just as he was about to make contact her hand came up and stopped his. She kissed his knuckles and guided his hand to cup her jawline. He shuddered with pleasure before slouching into the seat, half-asleep and only dimly aware of the scenery rushing past.

"And don't you forget it," she replied.