Day 17: The Right Rite

Wedgie / Spank

Something was in the air, and Auderinus Nuarawidos did not care for it. Not one bit. For the past week and a half he had been staying in his new country estate, he couldn’t shrug off the odd feeling of being watched. He heard creaking that came out of nowhere. Odd items seemed to disappear, then appear in the most peculiar places he had no memory of even visiting.

Was he just being paranoid?
Yes. Definitely.
He made a point of being paranoid. Always. Constantly on edge. Ready to spring into action at a moment’s notice, no matter what happens. But Auderinus could feel something was off. He had been trained in the arcane arts since the moment of birth. There was definitely something funky about the residual mana.

His eyes shifted as he paced from room to room. He spotted nothing out of order, but he wouldn't expect to. For each step, the floorboards succumbed with a shrill creak. He stopped in the study.
There was another creak...

He turned abruptly. Nothing there. Only the hallway from where he came.
He turned back to the study.

“Ahhh!”
Auderinus jumped back. Before him a lean woman stood, dressed in red hakama tied at the waist in a red bow, with white long-sleeved kimono tucked inside. She pressed her palms together, smiling playfully at him.
“Oh…” He flipped his chestnut hair off his face, “Y-you’re Asuka, aren’t you?”
Her grin sharpened, and she answered with a bow, “Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Nu-ara-wi-dos San. I do hope you do not mind that I let myself in.”
“...Yeah. I’m just happy to see you right now, but... please. Do remember to knock next time.” Auderinus cleared his throat, “May I offer you some tea?”

Asuka gave a narrow but sincere smile, “Oh, Nu-ara-wi-dos San… I have been waiting for someone to ask since I set foot on this continent.”
“But of course.” Auderinus answered with a smile on his own, as he leaned through the entrance of his study, “Buri! Two cups of tea, will you?”
“A’ight, Chief! Two cups, coming right up! Grunt!”

When Auderinus heard that a renowned exorcist from Zipangu would be passing through, she struck him as exactly the solution he was looking for. For the past couple of days he had been in correspondence with her about his concerns, and she had pretty much insisted on taking a look.
Auderinus did not know what to expect, but he wasn’t expecting… that.

Asuka was short, reaching only up to Auderinus’s navel, yet she presided over the space with a subdued dominance that made anyone nearby aware that, whatever she wanted, she got.
She belonged to a race of raccoon people native to Zipangu called Gyoubu Danuki, known for their cunning and intelligence. According to legends, they travel to the lands of the Order to spread their corrupt wares. But if that was true then no one has ever seen through their disguise.

Undisguised, they appeared as Asuka. She had round fuzzy ears and an enormous fluffy tail swishing behind her. But unlike the beastmen that roamed the wilderness, she had hands like a human. She had feet like a human too, and adorned them with sandals of thick wood which had a pair of wooden “teeth” as soles.

Clop!
Clop!
Clop!

How she managed to sneak up on Auderinus with those things on, he would never know. He heard every step on the way to the table in the lounge of the south wing. There, a maid poured up a pair of fuming cups to them. A pig maid, with short twisted tail poking out from under her skirt, soft pointy ears and thick pink body. When she served Auderinus, she leaned in especially close to give him an exceptional view of her bountiful chest.
“Enjoy your tea, master~” She said, oinking.

Once done, she carried the silver tray away with a bounce in steps and sway in her hips.
Asuka sipped from her cup, “My, you have some lovely servants indeed. She is one of them 'orcs' that roam the continent, no?”
"The very same." He answered.
"Really now. She's as far from the picture I have of the orcs from stories I've heard. The band of savage brutes who raid the countryside in search of men."
Auderinus chuckled, “That’s not too far from what they were like when I encountered them. Hell, they were about to **** me into submission and take me away to do who knows what.”
“Oh, my…” Asuka covered her mouth. Monsters commonly didn’t aggressively attack in Zipangu, “And yet you ended up so close in the end?”
Auderinus met her with a smirk, “You could say that... to be honest, this was exactly what I planned when I wandered into their territory. Orcs by nature start out as predatory and dominant, and will try and capture their man by ****. But if their target ends up overpowering them, then they relent to his strength. Become subservient. Loyal. So all I had to do...”
He held up his closed hand. When he opened it, a bright amber flame flickered over his palm, "Was to come a little prepared."
“Is that so?” Asuka sang, “And now you got an entire harem of willing pig girls all for yourself. That certainly is an… intriguing taste.”
He shook his head, “I don’t have any interest in them, Asuka. Not really. My heart and soul is dedicated to one thing and one thing only. And that is the pursuit of money. Having a staff of strong and dedicated monsters can always be handy in any enterprise.”

“So you say, so you say.” Asuka took another sip,”But then the maid outfit…”
“That’s entirely their doing. I have no idea where they even get these things, but they insist on trying to seduce me at every turn. They are mamono, after all.” He laughed, “Not that their attempts will ever sway me. I’ve got my eyes on their price. The point is that they obey every command of mine. Even if I ask them to die for me.”

A clatter was heard as Asuka lowered her cup to the saucer, “You’re a man of ambition indeed, Nu-ara-wi-dos San. But I must warn you, those who attempt to take advantage of the desires of mamono for their own gain inevitably end up trapped in those very desires.”
“I believe I will be more than capable of managing myself. If things ever get out of control, my magic will be enough to deal with them. And I’m confident in my ability to foresee a problem before it afflicts me. That’s why I picked out this manor to act as our headquarters, to reconvene and organize. And that’s why I called you, Asuka, here to provide a solution for whatever has afflicted this estate.”
“It is a most impressive homestead, I have to give you that.” Asuka assured him, “I didn’t take you for a big spender. Not after that speech you gave of your aspirations.”
“I’m not. Got this for almost nothing. It actually started out as a convent for nuns, but that came to an end once they got a visit from a certain serial killer. It was then repurposed as manor, but the people who moved in all either moved out immediately, or went insane.”
“Ah, and now you have thought out an alternative three… Which is to say me. Is that it?”
“You got it.”

Asuka gave him the most predatory grin, “Now, I would absolutely love to offer you my advice as an expert on exorcism… But I must warn you, I must insist to be paid in advance. Here are my fees.”
The raccoon girl wrote down on a slip of paper, and slid it back to Auderinus. He picked it up and took a look at the price. He nearly had a heart attack. That was nearly half the sum he paid for the house!
“I see. A bit on the steep side, wouldn’t you say?”
“That is the price for my services, Nu-ara-wi-dos San.” She tented her fingers, “I will not go so much as a specie lower.”

His eyes shifted between her and the slip of paper. It was not as if he could keep living there until the spirits drove him insane. He couldn’t sell the manor now. Not without a considerable loss. All things considered, even with the exorcist fee in mind, the house would still have turn out as the bargain of the century.
He sighed, “It’s… acceptable. Tory?”

Another one of his orc girls arrived, also dressed in a maid outfit. He gave the slip of paper to her. Tory left, and returned with a small sack of gold coins.
“Pleasure doing business with you.” Asuka said with a smile.

After both parties signed the contract, Asuka made a thorough investigation of the estate. She came back to the south wing just before sunset, where Auderinus awaited in his armchair, arms folded before his chest.
“Well?” Auderinus leaned towards her, “Did you figure out how to get rid of the spirits?”
She shook her head, “I’m afraid I have to be the bearer of bad news, Nu-ara-wi-dos San. From what I could tell, every single nun who were killed lingers within these walls as evil spirits. The entire estate is washed in demonic energy. It will not be as simple as putting up a talisman or two.”

“We are not moving.” Auderinus asserted, “Are there any alternatives? Anything at all?”
“Ah, yes… If you are ready to try anything, then there is something we can try.” Her most predatory grin glowed up again, “Tell me, Nu-ara-wi-dos San, what do you know about sumo?”
He blinked, “Sumo? That game where fat babies wrestle with each other?”
“Oh, I’m sure that’s what it looks like for foreigners. But it actually is deeply intertwined with Zipanguese spirituality. Every aspect of it plays a ceremonial role. Indeed, in the right circumstances, a game of sumo is the ultimate cleansing rite.”
"I see… You’re not suggesting we need to get some of those flabby strongmen and have them fight within these walls?”
“Oh, no no no.” Asuka waved dismissively, “As the house owner, it falls on you to participate.”

“...Say what now?”
Asuka clapped her hands together, shooting him her most innocent smile, “ Oh, and why not use one of your porcine assistants for your opponent? Look at their builds! Look at their… Grace. Why, I can hardly imagine a better rikishi.”
“You mean… We get to go up-close and personal with master?” One of the orcs inquired with a grunt, glowing with anticipation.
“Maybe get a little handsy with him?”
The orc girls squealed and oinked as their faces flushed, completely enraptured in their fantasies of going down with him in the ring.
“Absolutely out of the question!” Auderinus yelled, standing up from the chair.
“Oh?” Asuka said, her round ears slumping down “Oh… That’s too bad, Nu-ara-wi-dos San. I wish I could’ve been of more assistance. I’ll just take your money and head for greener pastures.”

…That’s right. According to what they agreed on, he paid for her advice. And that’s exactly what she gave him. If he rejected it, she had no obligation to pay him back.
“...I suppose it’s worth a try.”
…
…

“Very good, Nu-ara-wi-dos San!” Asuka said, clapping her hands, “Now take off the robes.”
Auderinus groaned, but pulled on the sash to let the red garment float to the ground outside the ring. The orcs in the audience howled and panted at him, admiring his lean yet muscular elven frame. That’s more of his fair impeccable skin than they had seen since they were subjugated by his hands. Only the white loincloth that sumo wrestlers wear as their uniform was left to cover his shame. And his orc crew was positively elated.

His opponent, a voluptuous blond orc woman with enormous chest called Dari, had already entered the ring. She too wore only the white loincloth.
With a sigh, Auderinus stepped in as well. The fighters threw salt from their palm into the ring. Once out of salt, Auderinus dusted off his hands.
SLAM!

The floor shook when Dari stomped her foot. She was much taller and larger than Auderinus, and although her body looked soft, he knew she was a monster with monster strength. His own stomp ended swiftly with a faint thud.
“Now for the ritual sonkyo.” Asuka announced.

Both of them crouched standing tiptoe with their knees facing outwards. Each of them dipped their hips until their buttocks touched the balls of their feet.
They then crouched down by the center, legs far apart and knuckles resting on the ground. They stared each other down. Dari looked at him like a predator would her prey.

Auderinus stared up defiantly. Sure he didn’t have her size, or her strength. But Asuka had assured him that sumo was just as much about technique. Not like he had to win to get rid of the spirits, but he abhorred losing.
“FIGHT!”

With Asuka’s signal, they flung at one another. Before he knew it, her naked chest smacked into him like a meteor. He tried to reach for her belt, but it was far away. She grabbed his loincloth, and tugged it.
Oh the pain. The pain of it all.
It was the wedgie of thousand needles of pain.