You ask Her what she means

“What are you saying?” You ask her. “Oh, my poor son has always had the worst luck when it came to his, ahem, family jewels.” You giggle, your bf gets red faced, “Mom, she doesn’t need to hear about that stuff” “Yes I do” you quickly interject.

“Well ever since his danglers dropped, he’s been getting hit left, right and center. Not literally of course, but a lot more than any other boy. His first girlfriend, ah! She was so mean to him and his poor boy bag. I’m surprised he stayed with her as long as he did.” “Hm, maybe you just like it?” You ask your boyfriend. “What?! No! Why would I?” He asks, face turning deep red.

“I would hope not, otherwise some things I said in the past would become retroactively very awkward, hahaha. I used to threaten to crack his nuts with that very nutcracker you’re holding. I never did, of course, but it was always funny to see his reaction to even the implication.” His mom says. You start laughing, “Hey, it’s never too late!” You joke, and with that your bf shakes his head and walks out of the kitchen, face still red.

“So, I take it you’re also none-too gentle with my son’s, danglers?” You shake your head, “Not at all, haha. It’s just too fun and too tempting to not. I’m sure you get it.” She nods, “Oh of course I do. I never actually hurt my poor boy’s danglers. But when I was younger I was a terror to the boys in my class, or any boy who thought it appropriate to touch me without my permission. Even my husband, his father, let’s just say that it’s somewhat impressive that we had 2 children together.”