You're a straight male

POV change, I'll be writing in 1st person

Kate was everything to me. The first day of school we instantly became friends. I was a little shy and she didn't care. She saw me sitting by myself and decided that we were going to be friends if I wanted to or not.

After we started high school I managed to muster up all the courage I had and asked her out, I was so happy when she said yes.

At 18 she was picked up by Golden ticket records, and after a year I'd become her manager, skipping 3 years she was semi-famous and we decided to build our dream home, we didn't want a mansion and Kate wanted the main area completely open with big windows that overlook the woodland area behind our home, we also got an office to share upstairs between our master bedroom and the guest room. but my favourite place was in the basement, we had a mini studio that we would spend hours in, I'd play my guitar and she would sing, I'd fall in love with her every time I got to hear her angelic voice and afterwards we would relax in the hot tub just laughing and enjoying each others company.3 months ago was when my entire life crumbled, Kate had a concert, the crowd was the biggest we'd ever seen and I got to watch from the front row, I never liked standing backstage and Kate always kept her eyes on me through her entire set, this time though, she was about two thirds of the way through the set when the rigging collapsed, I raced to her side but she was already gone, 3 other people lost their lives and even though it was selfish I didn't care about them, I held Kates lifeless body tight to me, there was nothing I could do.

I've visited her grave every day, it is nice to know that her fans, even after 3 months, still visit to pay respects and leave roses, the grave only has one different flower and that is the lavender that I replace when I need to, she loved lavender, it was her favourite colour and the loved the smell.

It's a short drive home and when I get in I trudge my way up to our office, Kate was almost finished with her new song, any time I tried to see what she was working on she'd scold me and tell me it wasn't finished, the night I got home I came in here and flipped the pages over so that I couldn't see what they said and wept while sitting at her desk, it's become a bit of a routine, I get home, sit at her desk until I get tired, then I go into the guest bedroom to sleep, I haven't been able to bring myself to sleep in our room, I don't think I'd be able to take it.

*Ding Dong* It's late, I wonder who it could be. I head downstairs and open the door, I freeze looking Kate in the eyes, "Hey Robin, I hope I'm not disturbing you, I haven't been around for a while and I've felt so lonely since Kate passed away, I just wanted to feel close to her for a while, I hope you don't mind," tears start to well up in my eyes when I realise it's Alex, Kate's younger sister, "Oh my god, are you alright?" She rushes over to me, she is so much like her sister it just drives home that I'll never see my kate again.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, you look so much like Kate that for a second I thought she'd come back," I blubber unable to contain my tears, I motion her to come in and excuse myself to the bathroom, I probably look So pathetic right now, "come in, I'll be a minute," I barely manage to say, I rush towards the ground floor bathroom and try to calm my self, I splash water on my face, damn I didn't expect to have another bad day. I'd taken to calling days where I wasn't able to manage my grief as bad days. After managing to calm myself down I went out to try and greet Alex properly, I head into the living room and Alex is sat on the couch with Kate's childhood blanket, Kate liked to wrap it around her when she was nervous, which was before every recording session and concert. "Hey Alex, I'm really sorry for breaking down like that, I just didn't expect," I up a little before clearing my throat, "I didn't expect you."

"Robin, there's no need to apologise, I should have called and by the look of it, I should have been here more to support you. Has anyone been by to check up on you?" she asked.

"No, but don't worry I'm fine, I just... I miss her so much," I wipe a tear away before it falls.

"I didn't realise, I've been so busy first with shock and then I thought I could just drown everything with work, listen I'm going to stay here with you for a while, I know you need time but you also really need someone to look out for you and obviously no one has taken any time to do so. I'll stay in the guest room, don't worry I'm not going to baby you but you obviously aren't getting the support you need right now and I know Kate would hate seeing you like this. I don't have any clothes with me so I'll bring some back with me after work tomorrow and I'll stop by the grocery store it doesn't look like you've been eating properly," Alex rambles a little.

"Okay, sure, thanks for looking out for me Alex, I'll quickly go clean up the guest room and I'll let you get some sleep," I head upto the guest room and pick up my things before straightening out the bed, I head out and go into the study to turn off the lamp when something falls, It looks like a sticky note, Kate used to leave these everywhere for me to find, I must have missed this one, I pick it up and read it, it says -Everyday I'm with you I fall in love with you all over again- I feel the waterworks start to build up again and I sit down for a minute to calm myself, I need to be stronger with Alex here after all Kate was her sister and I'm sure she is just as torn up as I am, I take one last look at the note and kiss it before sticking it on my desk.

I head downstairs and tell Alex that the room is ready, we both head up and I'm about to go into my room, "Alex... Could I hug you? You don't have to, it's just whenever Kate was going to be staying away she would hug me and wish me a good night, it's erm, actually never mind."

"Wait, come here," she opens her arms.

I walk over and embrace her time seems to stop and speed up all at the same time, I stroke my hand through her long auburn hair and breathe deeply, "Goodnight Kate, I love you now and forever," my eyes shoot open as I realise what I've said, I push back, Alex has tears flowing freely down her face "I-I'm so sorry Alex, I wasn't, I didn't."

She pulls me back in for a second, this time openly crying, "It's alright, I miss her too," this hug is different, I feel like it's more about me needing to support her than me needing support.

We separate, "I.. Goodnight Alex," I walk to my room and hesitate before opening the door, it's been 3 months since the last time I entered the room, our clothes are still at the foot of the bed and it still looks dishevelled, I walk over feeling all cried out and lay down on my side of the bed.