Why even go?

The bell hadn't rung yet, which meant it wasn't quite fourth period. If he was being honest with himself, he didn't really feel like going. He was worn out from fucking Cassie so hard — mentally, physically, and emotionally — that he'd really rather just go home and take a long hot shower. He didn't think his teacher would appreciate him missing class though, and he'd rather not fail a test because he skipped; Madame Decuire, the French teacher, was notorious for her tests, and French wasn't his best subject to begin with.

Readjusting his backpack and again feeling the soreness of his muscles, Kevin was hit upon by several ideas at once. He could wish away the strain, wish himself fluent in French, and his earlier wish made it so that Madame Decuire probably didn't care less about him missing class.

Rubbing his hands together and cracking his knuckles, he wished, "I wish that I am no longer sore, will never get tired or sore unless I want to, and that I am fully fluent in—" a thought occurred to him mid-wish "—all languages."

The wish took effect immediately. The soreness in Kevin's body quickly receded to nothingness, leaving him feeling more energized than he'd ever felt in his life. At the same time, he was hit with a wave of dizziness as the knowledge of how to fluently read, write, and speak all languages man had ever conceived, including the dead ones, flooded his mind.

He quickly decided that wishes on himself were the safest and would probably be the most gratifying in the long run, even if any wish that altered his brain seemed to leave him with something of a head-rush. He was about to wish himself home, when he remembered he had an SUV in the parking lot and a sister to give a ride home.

He contemplated wishing these problems away, but he didn't want to deal with trying to figure out what the aftermath might be. Plus, what fun was skipping without someone to enjoy it with.

Thinking for a moment, Kevin recalled that Hana had biology third period, and set off back to Mrs. Cooper's class. When he opened the door to the hall, however, he was met with a sight that made the nerd in him shiver. Brad Meyers was picking on a scrawny short kid, holding his backpack above his head.

"Come on Brad, let the kid have his stuff," Kevin said in a weary voice.

Brad rolled his eyes and tossed the bag at the student he'd been tormenting, nearly knocking him over. As Brad's now confused victim took off down the hall, the quarterback looked after him almost longingly. Turning to Kevin, he shook his head and said, "I'll never understand why you're such a goody-goody. You're strong enough to shake down nerds, just like the rest of the team."

"Maybe I'm just confident enough to not need to torment someone else to make myself feel better," Kevin shot back, with more vitriol than he'd intended.

If Brad took offense, he didn't show it. He just grinned, adjusted his crotch, and said, "Hey, man, I've got plenty of confidence, if you know what I mean."

Kevin unfortunately did, and he was sick of it. Taking a brief moment to formulate a plan, He wished, "I wish I knew how long Brad Meyers' penis is." Instantly, he knew it was just shy of seven inches long; big, but several inches shorter than his own, and hardly worthy of the title 'Thundercock'. Still, it was too much for the bully and it was time to change that.

"I wish that starting right now, Brad Meyers' penis will shrink half an inch each time he does something unkind, also that his penis will grow a quarter of an inch at the end of each day during which he does something kind for someone he doesn't know to a maximum length of eight inches, and finally that if he does no good deeds for a week his penis will begin to shrink by half an inch each day until he does something good for someone he doesn't know." Hit by a spark of inspiration, Kevin amended, "I wish that my previous wish applied to the entire football team, with the limit on growth being one inch longer than their current length."

"Anyway," Brad said, speaking over Kevin as he made his wish, "I came here to congratulate you, man." He walked over and draped an arm over Kevin's shoulder. "You not only bagged Cassie, but you wore her out! I guess if anyone could pull it off it'd be you; I mean, you've got more energy than anybody else on the team. She looked fucking exhausted when she walked out of there, man, well for her. You told me earlier you were going for her, but I figured you'd just ask her out or something, not bang her in an empty classroom. Much respect." He extended his free fist to Kevin for a bump.

Kevin raised his fist and tapped it against Brad's. Grinning at the praise from the man he'd just cursed, he said, "What can I say, she wanted it. Wait, how did you know we'd be in there?"

Brad laughed, "Dude, I had no idea. I just heard some chick moaning like crazy while I was walking by in the hall and thought I'd stick around to see who it was. Don't worry though, I chased off the other guys hanging around; they were creeping me out."

Kevin opted to not point out that it was just as creepy that Brad had been listening, instead asking, "What did Cassie say when she came out and saw you?"

A pall fell across Brad's face and he absently rubbed his ribs, as he said, "Let's just say I won't be telling anyone about finding you two. Your new girlfriend can be very convincing." Brightening back up, he slapped Kevin on the back and said, "Anyway, congrats, man! I'll see you at practice!"

Kevin watched as his former tormentor and current experiment walked away. He was still trying to wrap his head around a few things the quarterback had said.

"You're strong enough to shake down nerds, just like the rest of the team."

"I guess if anyone could pull it off it'd be you; I mean, you've got more energy than anybody else on the team."

"I'll see you at practice!"

To his great confusion, Kevin was fairly sure he was now on the football team. He tried to search his memories, but only found what he had before, that he hung out with the team and the cheerleaders, but wasn't actually on the team. Then it struck him, his earlier wish had only been to understand the changes caused by his wish to make his family rich.

Bracing himself for another rush of information, Kevin wished, "I wish to know the changes my wishes have caused and the changes that all future wishes cause as I make them."

After a now familiar buzzing in his head, he had the answer to his question. He was now, and to the rest of the world had been for some time, the celebrated running back of the Eastlake Tigers, almost as revered as Brad himself.

Apparently his wishes for immunity from serious injury, limitless energy, and a body that could keep up with a dynamo of a cheerleader had been enough to make him a good fit for the position, and Jess and the rest of his friends had pushed him into it at a young age, despite his geeky hobbies.

In fact, his love of FPS games had actually rubbed off on a lot of the team and they played together online regularly. A couple of them had even gotten into the more battle oriented shonen anime in a very casual way. He had, to some small extent, gotten the cool kids into geeky stuff. He almost felt bad for wishing for their dicks to shrink. Almost.

His recollections of his current reality made Kevin realize a couple of things. First, he had practice today, which could throw a wrench in his plans to skip class with his sister. Second, and perhaps more important, he needed to make a wish.

"I wish that my wish regarding the penises of the football team didn't apply to me."

That bullet dodged, Kevin was still left with a choice. Should he skip school with his cute Asian sister, or hang around and attend practice, potentially seeing the results of his wish for more decent football players?