What Are We, Some Kind Of Sui-Side Plot?

Written in collaboration with Shadowmage

“Ugh, can’t believe you’re making us go through the bloody sewers Waller.” Hissed an angry Australian, groaning deeper when his foot hit something squishy. “And if that wasn’t fuckin’ bad enough, we’re in the sewers of the wanker capitol of the world: Gotham Fucking City!” He roared while kicking the water he was standing in.

The blue woman he splashed yelped in surprise. “Hey! Watch it!” She snipped, “I’ll freeze your fucking balls off Boomerang! Don’t you dare splash me with bat shit again!”

“It’s water. Stop being a baby.” Growled the large reptilian man walking in front of her.

“Says the guy who practically lives down here.” grumbled a woman on fire floating just above all the brown liquid. “I’m with the others, why the fuck are we here?!”

The man in the very front, wielding just a semi-automatic rifle and tactical army vest, sighed. “We follow orders. Anyone has a problem can have a new eating hole to eat through. Explosively.”

Other than a few under breath grumbles the crew piped down. Rick Flag nodded, satisfied with the response to continue their trek through the sewers.

Though he had questions too.

“Off the record, why this team Waller?” He asked very quietly to the woman in his ear, “Seems like a lot of fire power for Gotham.”

“That attitude is exactly why you have so many high powered assets.” Crackled the woman back in his ear. “Reports say that Batman’s about to crack down on the Ice Lounge in search of the same information we need. Without those villains to distract him you’ll never get the safecracker to crack the Penguin.”

“Safecracker.” Boomerang laughed, “Is that the name of whatever weirdo you have in that high tech bullshit?”

Flag looked back at the woman he was talking about. Being guided through the murky depths by Killer Croc was someone in a LOT of high tech bullshit. Her eyes and mouth were covered, as well as having hands trapped by enough locks to slow down even Deathstroke. Considering the company they were in, it was a strange sight for this average looking girl to be the one locked up so heavily.

“Penguin isn’t going to tell us what we want to know, that’s why she’s here.” Rick explained, “The freak locked the info in the deepest safe possible, one in his ****. Meaning we need an expert of mind manipulation in order to extract what’s in there.”

Waller’s voice suddenly crackled through a speaker on the woman’s iron mask, “Hypnota knows what’s happening and has agreed to this task for time off her sentence. She also knows why I don’t trust her blue controlling eyes to be let out for anyone to see.”

Frost clicked her tongue, looking at the contraption a little suspiciously. “Yeah? Why the mouth cover then?”

“In her own words: So she didn’t have to endure Boomerang’s small talk.” Walker replied bluntly, getting a wave of chuckles from the villains. “She’s also wearing a camera so I can have an extra pair of eyes on the situation.”

“Speaking of, we’re here.”

The group all looked up at the seemingly harmless ladder leading to the surface. They had all been briefed on the Penguin’s many escape routes around Gotham, this was just the one he’d be closest to at 10:42 in the morning. The plan was Croc and Volcana to burst in there first, Croc to capture Penguin and Volcana to take down any immediate threats. Then Frost, Boomerang and Flag would bring Hypnota up. Easy, in and out type grab. Even if Batman shows up there’s enough of a group to cover the hypnotist long enough to get the info.

That was, until Volcana said: “There’s no one here!”

“What?!” Waller hissed through the speaker, “That’s impossible! The Penguin’s missing?!”

“Not just Penguin.” Gruffed Killer Croc, “Whole damn club is empty. Not a soul in sight.”

The rest of the team quickly headed up to the hidden room of the office suite inside the Iceberg Lounge. Sure enough, the club was a ghost town. The once bustling hive of scum and villainry was only missing a tumbleweed.

Even as they entered deeper into the club they found no one. Not even a leftover janitor. If it was Batman there’d be more **** goons, if it was Joker there’d be more laughing corpses, if it was Penguin there’d be more abandoned fools. No one made sense.

“Are you seriously fuckin’ telling me we walked through all that shit for nuthin?!” Yelled Boomerang stamping his foot and kicking a random empty bottle on the floor, “Waller you are an absolute fucking cu-!”

“Don’t say anything you can’t take back Boomy!” Chirped a new voice. One that quickly squeaked a little when multiple weapons were pointed at her. “H-hey! Is that any way to greet an old teammate?”

“Harley.” Rick groaned, “The hell are you doing here? Was this you?”

The clown reached over and leant her elbow on his gun, “You fuckin serious Flag? You think little ol me has the power to disperse the whole Lounge?” She tutted as if he was a true fool, before singing, “Someone’s losing their touch~!”

“Harleen Quinzel. I have the authority to put you back in my custody with a new micro explosive in your neck within two seconds if you don’t start telling us what’s going on!”

She instead just blinked at the place the voice had come from. “That you in there Waller? I knew you and Flag were into kinky shit but to bring it to the workplace…”

“HARLEY!”

The woman backed off when several villains yelled at her in unison. “Hey! I don’t know anything Gawd!” She admitted, “I needed to call in a favour for my own shit I’m dealing with, then when I go penguin hunting, no fucking Penguin!”

The group collectively lowered their weapons. Knowing that Harley wasn’t a threat, even if she was lying.

“Still no sign of Penguin. I’m advising full retreat.” Rick said with his stern voice. “And may I say off the record, I’m getting the fucking creeps Waller..”

“Not yet. This is still a chance to search his physical documents.” She grumbled, “This will not be a bust.”

“Well, I was about to check Penguin’s booby traps!” Harley chirped up again, “If I had a super secret lair I know I’d get stuck in em all the time!”

The group considered this, looking at the clown in confusion. “Traps?”

“Yeah!” She grinned, a chill going down their spines when the grin turned a little too evil. “Like this one!”

It all happened so suddenly, Harley grabbed the bound Hypnota and dragged her forwards. In a second the two began freefalling, leaving the rest of the Suicide Squad behind as their trap closed behind them. It gave way to a slide that pushed them quickly to a secret freezer that Penguin wanted to keep Batman in. It was dark, especially for the woman looking at it through the camera screen.

“Harley’s stolen the asset!” Amanda barked through her comms to Rick, “I’m trying to re-establish visuals!”

In the dark screen, in the dark room, the dark skinned woman was looking deep to see where her stolen villain had been taken. Any clue as to where Harley was or where they were in relation to Flag.

At that moment, Amanda Waller had lost.

Because instead of finding the information she wanted, she found herself staring at the most beautiful pair of breasts she’d ever seen.

“You can see them, can’t you, Waller?” Came Harley’s voice, somewhere registering in the woman’s mind but unable to think of anything but those tits. “They’re fucking beautiful aren’t they? Able to turn anyone’s mind to absolute mush just from sight.”

With incredible superhuman resistance, Amanda Waller was reaching forwards to turn off her monitor. This was supposed to be a quick job, one that didn’t require all her usual backup and helpers, so she was alone in her office.

But she stopped when she heard that voice.

“Stop Amanda Waller.” It whispered to her, making her hand freeze just before it touched the button, “Stop resisting and stare deeper.”

The voice had told her to look deeper, and so she did. Looking at every inch of breast like it was the most beautiful thing in the world. She wanted to jump into the screen and worship them for all time, suckle and squeeze those massive mammaries like her life depended on it. Cause right now, it felt like it did.

“You are under my control. Now and forever. Repeat this to us.”

“I am under your control. Now and forever.”

“You wish for Jason Todd to grow a harem. You will do everything in your power to make this wish come true. Correct?”

“Yes. I will do everything in my power for Jason Todd to have a harem.”

“Good girl Waller.” The voice praised, making the smart and powerful Amanda orgasm on the spot from such a simple phrase. “Now. Release Hypnota. Let my sister and I bind ourselves together.”

Waller didn’t hesitate for a second. Slamming the button to release her and thanking the stars that Harley had enough mercy to hold the camera steady, keeping it trained on those breasts.

There was a significant clang as the rest of the contraption fell to the floor. “Wuzz happenin?” Hypnota asked, bleary eyed and confused. “Where’s Penguin?”

When her blue eyes did fully open it was to the sight that would soon take the rest of the Suicide Squad. Two bouncy bosoms that glowed in the darkness, on the front of a beautiful woman smirking down at her.

“Hello Hypnota.” Purred The Mighty Endowed. “We’re about to make such sweet music together."