What'd you think asswipe?

The duo walk up to door number seventeen and Lani quickly opens the door.

They then head in and immediately make themselves comfortable on the double bed but sit on opposite sides to make sure they avoid one another's gaze.

John sets his bag down at the side of the bed before asking, "Uhh, does the room have a uhh-".

"A bath, yeah, through that door" John then gets up before heading to the bathroom, as he does, he's stopped by Lani's voice, "Can you... fill up... a bucket for me?".

John is stunned, for the first time since she left Tally's, Lani's voice seems almost, innocent once again, John simply nods and says, "Uhh, yeah, sure, umm... where is the bucket?" Lani points to her side of the bed and John heads over, grabbing the bucket before heading into the bathroom.

John is immediately surprised as he sees an actual bath with actual working taps. He's confused, so he asks Lani, "Hey, do baths here normally have taps?".

"Yes, why?" Lani responds.

"Uhh well.. I just kinda expected to fill the tub up with the bucket or jump in a creek" The human answers back.

Lani lets out a small giggle before saying, "We're not savages! We do have plumbing y'know?".

John let's out an impressed chuckle before looking around, looking for the toilet but doesn't see anything resembling one so he asks, "So, where's the toilet?".

"Look for the wooden chest!" John is confused as he looks around again. He then sees what Lani seems to be describing, so he heads over, seeing what seems to be the lid of a toilet. John begins to worry as he approaches said wooden chest.

John finally gets to the chest before grabbing the lid and lifting it up, seeing that there's a hole there but no flusher.

He sighs in annoyance but that's when it hits him, the absolute revolting stench that emanates from within. John quickly closes it, coughing as he gets to the doorway and asks, "That's the toilet? I though there was plumbing here?".

"Okay, we may not be as advanced as Earth but it beats shovelling it".

John sighs before asking, "What about toilet paper?".

"There should be a little door at the bottom, should be some in there" Lani explains.

"Oh, okay, so, i'm probably gonna regret asking but, where does that lead to?" He asks while pointing to the toilet before realising that Lani isn't beside him.

"The hole?" Lani asks for clarification.

"Yeah" John responds.

Lani chuckles, "It leads to a Xharlyun pit".

John then asks, "What's a Xharlyun?".

Lani has finally turned back into her old guide self again as she explains, "Oh, Xharlyun's are a pacifist species. They live in tunnels underneath the ground, you can usually find them in deep caves. They like to stay away from the Network to avoid the carnivores".

"Oh, so they don't mind people, dumping their literal crap in their caves?" John asks with a disgusted tone.

"Oh no, they love it! It's how they feed!" Lani explains making John almost gag at the thought.

"Hold on... they... feed... on shit?".

"Yep, faeces, urine, pretty much any waste you can imagine. It's practically why the streets are so clean. They also mate like six times a day to create more too".

John opens his eyes in shock as he thinks, "Six times a day? God, I'd love to be able to do that!".

John is eventually snapped out of his mind by Lani who asks, "So, about that bucket?"

"Oh yeah! My bad" John eventually heads back into the bathroom and turns the water taps on, filling up his bath and Lani's bucket.

After a few minutes, John eventually finishes and heads into the bedroom again with the heavy bucket in hand, "Uhh, where do you want this?".

"Oh, just here thanks" John then places the bucket on the floor beside Lani's side of the bed.

"Okay, do you need anything else?" John asks.

"No, i'm fine, but thank you for asking" John then nods before heading back into the bathroom and stripping off what little clothes he had on before getting into his bath. The steam emanating off of the water surface as he sits down, relaxing after a very, very, weird day.